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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

ignoring my daughter's uncomfortable sock/knicker complaints?

40 replies

DonMusic · 10/01/2012 10:33

My lovely 5 year old daughter seems to have a problem with seams - it used to be knickers and now it's socks. We just let her go sockless on non school days, even if it's cold. On school mornings I just ignore her until she finally gets socks and shoes on after a lot of moaning. AIBU?

(Could be time for some new shoes, of course...)

OP posts:
MotherPanda · 10/01/2012 10:35

Sounds like she might have sensitive skin - I have this and knicker seams are awful! Would you like spend all day in itchy knickers? Perhaps invest in some 100% cotton underwear and socks for her?

OR

This is what all 5 year olds do - testing the limits...

lesley33 · 10/01/2012 10:36

Are they too tight? children's feet at this age are delicate and too tight socks are as bad for them as too tight shoes.

sunshineandbooks · 10/01/2012 10:37

Just turn them inside out.

Pagwatch · 10/01/2012 10:37

Or sensory issues. Ds2 has this, ds1 did a bit but it has become much easier.

IndigoBell · 10/01/2012 10:38

Yes, I was going to say turn them out.

Kids really can be sensitive to seams, either wear the socks inside out or buy seamless socks (and knickers).

So, YABU. Ignoring your child makes her feel like you're not listening to her or taking her seriously, and makes her less likely to confide in you later.

IndigoBell · 10/01/2012 10:39

Seamless Socks

AngelDelightIsIndeedDelightful · 10/01/2012 10:39

My dd (also 5) moans about her sock seams too. I just ignore her Blush

Dd is usually ok if she's put them on herself. If I've had to do it then she adjusts them until she's happy. YANBU to insist she wears them to school.

Freakyfroggie · 10/01/2012 10:42

My dd had serious sock issues from about the age of 4 for at least 2 years! It was a nightmare, socks would come on and off at least 6 times before they 'were right'. Tried several makes of sock with the same outcome. She'll grow out of it, good luck!

PersonalClown · 10/01/2012 10:42

I was going to say sensory issues too. Ds will take his socks off at the first available opportunity.

Pagwatch · 10/01/2012 10:45

Ds2 has sn so could not explain it. But ds1 is very articulate and was able to explain 'it may seem minor but it feels like something digging in me all day, like an itch, almost a pain. Imagine having an itch you can do nothing about ALL DAY!'

suiledonn1 · 10/01/2012 10:46

My dd1 is 5 and has issues like these. It has been going on since she was barely 2 though.

She always wears her socks inside out and must fix them in a particular way.
As regards underwear I only buy ones for her now that have smooth edges - none of those little stitched trims that most have. She is very particular about clothes and fabrics and hates when it is time to buy new things.

I think how you deal with it depends on the child. You know her best and if you think she is doing it to wind you up then it needs to be dealt with as a behaviour issue. At first I battled dd on it but got nowhere and we were always stressed and upset leaving the house.

However, I realised my dd is not doing it to wind me up. She is genuinely sensitive to these things and has been since before she could talk and I found that by making the effort to find things she is comfortable in we have made life a lot less stressful for her and for us.

My dd has eczema and also has some anxiety/sensory issues.
We did a quick checklist on The Highly Sensitive Child and she scored very highly.

janelikesjam · 10/01/2012 10:49

Some people/children are just very sensitive. Whether you "ignore" it or not is up to you, but I think its genuine.

As an adult I am funny about things like rough material on my skin and shoes - they have to be really comfortable or I can't wear them.

startail · 10/01/2012 10:52

Check for glittery bits. DD1 wouldn't wear anything with metallic thread in it.
Has she got any Xmas socks, any with the sparkles knitted not printed may irritate.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 10/01/2012 10:54

Have you considered 'diabetic socks', OP? I don't know if they're available for children but they might be. I bought them for my bothers because they don't leave marks on the legs, completely non-grip but they stay up.

Can't help you with knickers... I like modal ones but I'm sure they don't make them for children, although I can't see why really?

Miette · 10/01/2012 10:59

My daughter is exactly like this. We have had so many problems with socks and tights. She has quite a highly strung personality too. I assume the two things may be linked.

mrsjay · 10/01/2012 10:59

HAs she got other things she complains about fabrics or loud noises that irritate her she could have a sensory thing going on , Or maybe just they are digging in and bugging her you can buy seemless pants I have seen them but cant remember where sorry Blush not sure what you can do about the socks though maybe get her turn down ankle socks they are a bit baggier ,

seeker · 10/01/2012 11:03

My brother always wore his socks inside out because of the seams. Could you try that?

And get her some bigger knickers!

oldmerryolesoul · 10/01/2012 11:06

YABVVVU Dont ignore her, its really horrible to have itchy clothes, dont be so mean

mrspnut · 10/01/2012 11:10

I buy boxer shorts for my DD2, they are more comfortable and they provide more coverage.

I also deliberately buy her socks that are too big so they don't dig in.

FionaBruise · 10/01/2012 11:20

hmmm in two minds OP. My mum, god love her, never gave a proverbial oss about whether I was comfy in my clothes, shoes etc. and I kind of picked up from her that it wasn't important to look after your own comfort and now I have the most *ed up feet and am always incredibly inappropriately dressed because I didn't learn good personal care habits!!
wah ha yes I know I'm old enough now to take responsibility!!!
socks inside out sounds like a good idea and making sure that the socks are wide enough for her feet maybe?

mummytime · 10/01/2012 11:23

My kids have all had issues like this. We cut out labels if necessary (sometimes cutting them out can be worse, so I wait until a complaint). Try to get seamless socks. Avoid metallic thread in clothes. Check for dry skin, and use a moisturiser if this is an issue.
Also make sure she has plenty of time to put socks on (my DD1 used to take 20 minutes).

carrotsandcelery · 10/01/2012 11:26

My dh has this. It is a massive problem for him. He can't stand labels, seams, certain fabrics etc.

His solution is to wear a t shirt vest inside out under his day clothes. He likes the very soft almost chenille socks from Fat Face.

His mum didn't pay attention for a large part of his childhood and it made him miserable. Please do your best to make her comfortable (assuming she is not just "at it") Grin

mishtake · 10/01/2012 12:01

DS insists we remove every label from everything and socks always have to be inside out.
He detests his school uniform - so he wears shirts that are 2 sizes too big and has his tie on loose elastic.
I want him to be comfortable - if he is comfortable he won't fidget and get nagged at school, he will be able to play more freely and just have a much better time all round.
Don't really understand why you wouldn't want to make your child as comfortable as possible. Confused

IUseTooMuchKitchenRoll · 10/01/2012 12:04

Ds has issues with socks, but he has aspergers and it's a sensory thing. It's also a pain in the arse. He would ideally wear brand new socks every day if he had the choice. We used to turn them inside out, but he's not so bad with it now that he's older. They have to be dried in the tumble drier though or he won't wear them, so I am one of those awful people that has the drier on in the middle of a heat wave.

littleducks · 10/01/2012 12:07

I buy boxer short style pants for dd, but have ignored sock/tights fussing as otherwise it would be new stuff all the time....she finds them comfy until they have been washed Wink