Gender speciffic roles are all politiccaly correct bolllocks but really.......for the love of God...

[aquashiv]

Try as we might blokes will always defauult to the Iam a bit shit and we wll always be ne acccused of nagging if we make them try and makemake them pul l their weight ,,
tis a huge subject I know just would like to diccuss......what is the fecking answer

Indeed.

Drink less?

lol PERHAPS BUT HOW WOULD WE COPE

You'd be in my relationship if the roles were reversed and he was the nag and she were the lazy shit :o

Lower your standards and out-lazy them.

It's becomes a sort of stalemate, but one of you will break in the end and clean up. Just make sure it's him.

NO he isnt lazy at all he is just laxx he is lovely he sees things he sees alot but npot enoguth. admit I have drink take taken and am not lucid yet he is ist that hartd is it realy tha t hard ......to put them to bed that all

But don't tar all blokes with the same brush. That's why feminism has a bad name.

Perhaps that really is the answer but with women we cant just leave it, and walk away we feel world will explode we really do feel we need to control everthing. Let them be in control and let pissy stinky socks be the way to go rock and roll

xx

ee

No, feminism has a bad name because idiots come up with straw man arguments then conclude '... and that's why feminism has a bad name'. If you bothered to find out the first thing about feminism, you'd know feminists don't tar all men with the same brush.

OP, when you are less tipsy , head on over to the Relationships section and ask them to sort you out, this question comes up over and again. Or read Wifework.

Is the OP just pontificating LRD? I'm not entirely sure, but I don't think there's a whole absolute real issue in there is there?

But it@s darn hard to tell.

it's

I don't know chaos, it's entirely possible you're right.

Having said, my post was mostly an entirely sensible and measured response to someone not the OP ...

That it was LRD, and I have just looked up your Wifework recommendation, I am just completely bemused by the OP.

I'm sure she'll reatrun in the morning and elucidate more clearly.

return.

"with women we cant just leave it, and walk away we feel world will explode we really do feel we need to control everthing."

We can leave it. I'm very good at not cleaning up; an expert if you will. Stop tidying up. Then the magic happens

(And the world doesn't explode. Even if the house looks as if it has)

Not sure I understood the OP fully.
I was raised being shown that housework and childcare were the equal responsibility of both parents/partners, a tradition which I do my best to continue.
Is that what this thread is about?

I think the OP needs a lie down and will need strong coffee in the morning!

I think you has it in a nutshell there, SWB.

chaos - Wifework (the book) is good; wifework (the practice) is pissing me the hell of atm. Hence my, ahem, tone on this thread.

Erm, in my house it is less of a man/woman thing and more of a personality thing. Since I accepted that he doesn't have the same obsession standards as I do and he accepted that I can't live with a shit tip, we meet in the middle and rub along quite nicely. He has his areas of chaos and I have my areas of everything being in its place and we look after the DCs together.

Some men see caring and housework as a 'woman's job' but so do some women. It is scary how ingrained gender roles are. Is it this which makes me feel that my house must be perfect, my children all perfectly turned out and also be a huge professional success? (they aren't, I generally end up in a hot bath with a good book while all around me goes to shit)

I only date guys who have lived on their own, so I know they're at least able to do housework/pay bills/cook etc. OK, so their housework standards may not match mine (although I'm not a neat freak at all!) but at least I know they know how to work a washing machine etc.

I'd never move in with a guy who'd previously only lived with his mum or another partner.