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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Would you think badly of this woman?

56 replies

MamaMaiasaura · 08/01/2012 13:33

In large communal baby change with feeding areas in JL and baby us on change mat. A grandmother of another baby compliments the baby and the mum of the baby says her baby was a little fatty when born at 9lb odd. And then stumbles over her words in an arkward way not making a hell of a lot of sense. She ends up plonking dirty rolled up nappy by her babys head before scooping baby up and taking through to feeding area. She gove her other child iPhone to play on to keep him quiet. Then baby is screaming blue murder so and not latching on and disturbing all other babies so she gives up and plonks pops baby girl into her pram. Grabs her ds and leaves. She also commented to the grandmother in her incoherent rambling that she was frazzled and probably a bit blasé now it was number 3.

If you were an onlooker or indeed that grandma, I am dreadfully embarrassed as was end of a hell of a day. I do think my daughter is the most beautiful gorgeous little girl in the world. I don't really think she's a fattie bum and I love her more than life chocolate ad my boys are wonderful and I don't normally completely ignore ds2 and hold him by wrist so he doesn't scarper. He'd had meltdown in shop and I since realised is poorly.

OP posts:
DaenerysTargaryen · 08/01/2012 14:47

is it not ok to call babies fattie? i always say dd2 is a fattie and i think its cute but a lot of people do comment saying 'she's not fat she's a baby' Blush i dont mean it in a bad way.

i would think that you were having a trying day :)

bochead · 08/01/2012 14:51

I'd hope you had a supportive partner/Mum/bessie who could watch the kid for an hour or o when you got home o you could have a "power nap" you poor sleep deprived/exhauted you.

Too busy minding my own parenting to hoick judgey pants on most of the time I'm afraid.

DoMeDon · 08/01/2012 14:59

I'd probably be a bit Hmm at the time tbh - I'd think 'bet she's having a crap day'. I think life's harder when you care this much what others think. You had a tough day- we all have them. I have spent days cringing over throw away comments, reckoning everyone thought I was a total tit. Not worth it Smile

pigletmania · 08/01/2012 15:16

YABU the poor woman was probably sleep deprived, nothing really wrong with the comment at all, give her a break!

Tyson86 · 08/01/2012 15:23

Piglet the OP is the woman with the baby :)

pigletmania · 08/01/2012 15:24

oh right bit confused, in my heavily pregnant state Smile

pigletmania · 08/01/2012 15:26

No nothing wrong with the comment at all, don't sweat the small stuff. You will never see them again anyway.

MamaMaiasaura · 08/01/2012 16:04

Phew Grin feeling better now. I bet she understood then. Just a very crappy day yesterday. I did put nappy in bin Blush but whllst getting stuff together had plonked it right by her head absent mindedly.

Apologies to those who have attempted to read my posts and found them too garbled Blush I only get on her when settling or nursi g dd in day and it's tricky to type Grin

OP posts:
MamaMaiasaura · 08/01/2012 16:04

Who I went emocion crazy!!

OP posts:
MamaMaiasaura · 08/01/2012 16:05

Wow not who

OP posts:
QueenPodling · 08/01/2012 18:46

No, like the other posters commented, I would have just thought you were tired and a bit frazzled. We've all had our off days.

kerstina · 08/01/2012 19:48

Read your post twice and understand it now it made me Smile. I like the sound of you OP you sound funny and nice and concerned what people think of you. I used to call my DS stinker as a baby, tinker as he got a bit older and still call him tink occasionally and he is 9 now ! People might have judged me on this but i did not care I knew how much I loved him.

WilsonFrickett · 08/01/2012 19:52

OP - with love - go to bed! Grin

nicknamenotinuse · 08/01/2012 19:52

I don't understand your post.

MamaMaiasaura · 08/01/2012 20:00

Kerstina - thank you. Love the nickname tink.

Nicknamenitinuse - I'm not sure I do either. I think I delivered my brain instead of placenta.

Wilson Grin there already with ds2 one side (sleeping after massive paddy over which loo he wanted to use?!) and dd sleeping the other. I can'tmove

OP posts:
KatieScarlett2833 · 08/01/2012 20:02

She sounds stressed to me.

No wonder.

BackToBligg · 08/01/2012 20:08

Mama. You is well tired. Don't worry about it but look after yourself. Kisses.

quirrelquarrel · 08/01/2012 20:34

Poor OP! Everyone gets frazzled...everyone has a hundred of those days.

Although I'd have to be judgey about the iPhone- no Famous Five to hand? Wink

natalie111 · 09/01/2012 21:50

I wouldnt worry about it.I always forget my childrens ages.

AteAWholePacketOfBiccys · 09/01/2012 22:10

If I saw someone in the situation you described I'd think she was just a normal, busy, tired great mum who despite all that has taken all three children out somewhere to get out the house for a while.
When I had 3 young children I was buying lots of shopping and things including one of those huge outdoor clothes dryer washing line thingys which I had for some reason dangerously balanced on top of the double pram.
A lady was staring at me and I thought she was going to be mean but she was lovely and said how good the children were and how if she could she'd help and come and do my laundry for me!
Ever since then I have really, really hoped I will see her again as I have had more children and have bigger laundry piles

hellhasnofury · 09/01/2012 22:13

No, I'd smile sympathetically and wish I could offer her a coffee and a few minutes break.

ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 09/01/2012 22:15

I read the first paragraph thinking you were mad and why on earth would you judge someone who was clearly doing the best they could in difficult circumstances. Then I read the second paragraph and realised you were completely normal and probably in desperate need of a Brew, Biscuit and a long sleep.

wigglesrock · 09/01/2012 22:27

I'd just think you were like any mum of a grizzly baby and a child in a department store. I forgot momentarily dd3 dob last week when a lovely woman asked me. I also call dds the dogs name occasionally, well they begin with the same letter.

I'm terrible at accepting compliments on my childrens behalf; I get told they are well mannered etc and I mumble about how they are anti-Christs at home and they're not, I get told they are really attractive and I make inappropriate milkman jokes Blush

Lueji · 09/01/2012 22:36

Fattie is nothing...
My DS looked like ET at birth, IMO. :)

Then, between 9 and 12 months he was not fattie, but a big ball.

Lovely and lean now.

ReduceRecycleRegift · 09/01/2012 22:40

we thought DS looked like bart simpson in his scan pics Grin