to ask if anyone near me would mind

[MitchierInge]

. . . dropping off some cigarettes and a nice hot slice of pizza? My legs ache and I can't find my debit card and I forgot to tax and MOT my car. I'd really appreciate it and could pay you back by credit transfer.

please, it's an emergency. I'm quite hungry.

OK.

Where are you?

Hang on, where would one procure an individual slice of hot pizza?

you need to give us some idea where you are?

how odd

haven't you got some old tea leaves and some bible paper?

or a banana skin you can dry out?

this is what we used to do back in the day

and have some toast

hooray

I am in Suffolk

obviously am only serious if someone happens to be in the middle of Suffolk with spare cigarettes and pizza, it could happen couldn't it?

I've got quality street if you live within chucking distance!

well it could... I definatly would if I was but Im down south and just had homemade burgers salad and a nice big fat doughnut....currently can not move

Oh sorry I can't help.

You have given me an idea for a business venture, though! 'Cuntings Dial-a-Fag (and pizza)'

Oh I have spares. I keep them in a box for just this sort of emergency. I'll pop round now.

Can I eat the other 7 slices of pizza?

sis in law and me once called a taxi to get me more wine and fags

there used to be a taxi driver who did this sort of thing but is all a bit limiting without bank card

I suppose I could throw myself on a neighbour or friend's mercy

don't understand why the mechanics of independent living are so tricky sometimes :(

us not just me

Buppy, there was a similar business near me a few years ago.

The booze van

Sold fags, booze and class a drugs.

must stay away from the class as, in case I accidentally nearly marry someone I don't like

can take or leave the booze

is a bit inhumane for me to leave self without nicotine or cheese though - so a sandwich would do? doesn't have to be pizza

Do you have cash or just card?

I once rang a taxi to pick me a big mac up

dominos take paypal

the icey used to sell fags and carlies special brew when I was a kid

oh bless you
I would do it but i'm in scotland

not for first time but wish we had dominos - I suppose I could move house to a slightly more urban area?

anyway am sure will be massive relief for us all but found bank card, achieved trip to shop (and back!) despite walking as if horse is still between legs and have cigarettes and pizza is coming :)

but you know it was worth asking

Suffolk's a big place, nearest town or village?

right in the middle, Slowmarket is the urban sprawl

is typical really, if I name change to post something humiliating everybody in my postcode phones me to say 'is that you, stalked by a neo-Nazi and about to marry him?' but in serious need of pizza, undisguised - nothing!

lol, sorry, but I'm about 50 miles away!