to have refused point blank to buy my 4yo ds a wii, xbox, ds or similar for xmas

[Madbutmeanswell]

and to not consider doing so for many years yet?

In fairness my ds has never asked for one- its the other mums I have been chatting to at school gate who seem to think all kids need at least one or the will be 'left' out, I think this annoys me more.

Its hard enough getting him active enough, interested in reading enough etc with just tv to compete with.

No, it's your choice and they shouldn't judge you for it. Just as you shouldn't judge them for making a different one. Everyone does what they think best.

YANBU, why on earth would you at that age?

Don't be pressurised - especially not by other parents!

I keep waiting for my kids to ask for some sort of electronic gadget. They are 9 and 6 and truly aren't bothered. They read, they role play, they dance, they cook, they muck about in the garden, and they watch trashy TV. They seem reasonably balanced and not remotely deprived, or indeed bothered about not having one.

DD1 sometimes plays with her friend's WII and finds it fun, but only in the same way that someone else's toys are always fun!

YANBU.

We are a console free house. DS is 5yo and DD is 3yo.

I might get one in 2/3 yrs. But I'd rather get them outside or in their rooms than tearing around the living room under my feet.

If you don't want to you don't have to , If they want to thats up to them

It doesn't make you better than them or them better than you

That seems terribly young.

I think I bought my DS his first console (a 'pre-owned' PS2!) when he was about 9. He had two games - football, and the Simpsons.

My 4yo got a Storio, does that count? And he has this Lightning McQueen little computer thingy with a game and something bout letters and numbers - NORMAL toys for a 4yo (although to be fair he doesnt show much interest in the Cars thing, unless hes creating something or learning about science he just isnt bothered)...

Although I do know of someone who wants her childs father to buy her a mobile phone.

She is 5.

YANBU!

YANBU - we have an ancient PS1 which is DH's, and nothing else. My eldest is 7 and isn't unduly being left out for not having one....in fact he's just been made a free reader at school, and we all prefer being outside than inside in front of a screen (yes, I realise the irony of typing this on my laptop )

No - my DS is nearly 11 and only has a second hand playstation which he had to save up and buy for himself. I agree with AChicken - it's nice if they go to a friend's house and can enjoy playing with something different, just as DS's friends do different things when they come to our home. It hasn't seemed to stop him doing things with friends, it's not as if anyone refuses to come to our house as we are so 'old fashioned' .

yanbu about your decision not to get him a console, each to their own, however these "holier than thou" posts about how kids are better without a console ar getting a bit tedious.

We have 5 DC and we have a wii, an x-box, a PC, 2 laptops and a 3DS. These are just another part of family life and time limits are imposed. My DC spend more time reading and drawing than they do playing on consoles and they are outdoors a lot too.

Each to their own - consoles can be fun for 4 yr olds but they are not missing anything if they don't have them either

YANBU - 4 is very young for that sort of thing and it is a responsibility because the consoles aren't cheap. I wouldn't be buying one for a child that young.

That said I don't think they are that bad. I also think playing on a console like the Wii raises activity levels and allows for more cooperative playing than sitting in front of the telly. If too much telly watching is a battle I would rather my DC played together on a games console and moved about a bit rather than sat in front of the telly not communicating. But as I said, I reckon 4 is a bit young for it and if you don't think it right then that is entirely your choice and I am sure your DS isn't in the slightest bit disadvantaged by it.

I'd at least wait until he starts asking for this stuff. No sense in buying it when he doesn't even want it, because some other parents think you should!

Not being unreasonable at all. Games consoles are a lot of fun, but buying your DC a pricey present they're not actually asking for would be a bit foolish!

x posts Ephiny

Theres aways loads of 'well mine only have a cardboard box to play with' type posts on these sort of threads

My 5 yr old got a ds for Xmas

She still bakes dances reads role-plays

Carboard box? Luxury! Mine have a toilet roll tube and a piece of string

I don't think they need one at 4. The games will be too complex for them at this age anyway. We got one when ds1 was about 7, and that was partly because it was a dvd player too, so generally useful.

So long as the amount of time spend on them is monitored, the games age-appropriate and they have other interests, then I refuse to see a problem.

My dc have a grand old time with friends on the Dance one - they can be heard hollering with laughter and come off sweating. There are games that involve sharing, 'saving' eachother and communicating.

Mine are very active and have played out with friends for a few years now, weather permitting. They're 9 and do a lot of other stuff.

Individual opinion is understandable and totally valid, but some are coming across a bit sneery and Mother Earth, tbh.

YANBU

My Ds1 wants a DS, he is coming up for 5 and has intermittently asked for one, whenever he has been in the company of other (slightly older) children who have them.

I personally think they are a bit anti-social (based on experience of cousins of 7, and 11 excluding my ds when we were all visiting. The visit was meant to be a joining the family together again visit after a fall-out of 7 yrs or so, but was nothing to do with me. I realise that this obviously makes me biased, and you could say my ds was a bit young for these cousins, but he is very clever and articulate and can certainly hold his own. The cousins still play with toys that my DS won't touch, as they are for babies!! ) and I also don't like the lack of activity they encourage.

Having said that, he only really wants one when he sees other children with them. For Christmas, he got a Vtech Storio, which he loves and is very educational. He will be starting school in August and I wanted him to start using technology. I am aware that he is inactive when he's playing with it, but the weather has been so bad that we've hardly been ou, and he likes to play it in bed at night.

I know children of 7 who got those Tablet thingies for Christmas, as well as other hi-tech items.

I will get him a DS when he is older, but will be avoiding it as long as possible.

I'm not judging anyone who has these things for their DC at a young age, each to their own! But OP, I don't think YABU at all!

I think 4 is far too young. 7 is about right

DS2 (5yo) got a 3DS for Christmas, but we didn't buy it. We won it on a draw here on MN, otherwise he'd never have gotten it. That being said, he loves it, has limited time on it, and we've found some good games that are helping him with his pencil grip and practicing writing his letters, so it's all good.

NU to not consider buying things you don't want him to have. I won't buy things for my children that I don't want them to have, and don't feel any pressure to do so.

I think anything can be antisocial if you let it. Would a child engrossed in a book be as offensive to (some) people as a child engrossed in a ds? And having technological toys doesn't mean that children are no longer able to enjoy the simple things. They can play on a ds/wii/x-box one minute and still partake in and enjoy role-playing/books/board games the next.