to insist my DD walks to school (instead of me driving her)

[Mmmcoffee]

DD is nearly 14. High school is just under a mile away in our town, a country market town. Lots of children walk every day.

She has walked every day since she started there aged 11, unless it's been absolutely hammering down - then I would usually take pity on her and give her a lift. And quite often if I've been out shopping in the afternoon around that time, I'll text her and drive past the school to pick her up.

I don't have a car - DH uses our car for work, but my mum & dad live 5 minutes away and I have use of their car whenever I need it, they hardly ever use it except for shopping.

Tomorrow I'm taking mum & dad out, and mum just rang telling me to pick up the car tonight. I said I'd walk round there in the morning, and she said no, I should pick it up tonight so I could take DD to school in the morning. I said no, she is going to walk, and my mum got all huffy and said what if it's raining, it's so windy etc etc. I got a bit shorp and shart with her and said quite crossly "DD is WALKING".

Mum seems to remember that my dad "was always" picking me up from school. Er, no. Dad worked. He did pick me up, once a week, from an evening class that ended after dark, in London. My mum seems to think that I'm being 'hard' on DD, basically she's being the typical doting grandmother - shame she wasn't like that with me when I was little!

DD is perfectly capable of walking. She is getting a bit chubby and doesn't do a lot of exercise, and I think the walk is something she needs to do! I'm not being draconian, am I?

Balls.

short and sharp, obviously.

(I quite like shorp and shart though)

'shorp and shart' lol.

YANBU.

So your mum wants you to walk around in the wet, windy darkness to get the car?

Nah - tell her you couldn't possibly leave your DD in the house all alone in case she gets scared.

Most of the time I'd agree with you that walking is good, but just now the weather is particularly bloody awful. If its raining or hailing with the wind like it was this morning, I'd be inclined to make an exception (but tell DD that she was lucky you happened to have the car, not let her get the idea this is becoming the norm).

Well I totally agree that you DD should be walking to school when it is only that distance. But it sounds like she is generally and what you are talking about is just a one-off for tomorrow - that's hardly going to pile on the pounds is it?

It sounds to me like you are objecting to your Mum telling you what you should be doing with your own daughter - which I agree is irritating but for a one-off occasion is it worth rocking the boat? I would agree if your Mum was insisting on picking her up every day.

It's just one of things you shrug off, isn't it? I wouldn't get upset about it.

Was just about to write something along the lines of what CF said. The only unreasonable thing you've done is enter into a dialogue about this with your Mum, but I suppose not doing so is easier said than done.

Ah, I'm not getting upset about it LeBOF. Just honestly wondering if IABU to say a big fat no to my mum. It's been an issue since mum and dad moved here two years ago, until then she had no idea how DD got to school every day.

I don't have an issue with taking DD to school if the weather is really crappy, but it's not meant to be that bad tomorrow here - windy, dry and bright. The issue is more that mum wants to mollycoddle DD and thinks I should 'be nice' and drive her whenever the weather is cold, or rainy, or too windy etc, while I think DD is perfectly capable of walking unless it is really rotten out.

I should point out that DD is quite happy to walk, in fact when I got off the phone she rolled her eyes and said "Does nan want you to give me a lift again?" and then laughed. Bless her she knows exactly what her nan is like!

You are right, she is wrong.

It's good for your daughter to walk. She won't melt in a bit of rain, and if she is getting a bit chubby then a couple of miles of walking per day will help with that.

Oh, you're not being unreasonable at all. And your dd sounds lovely.

Oh, if the forecast for your area is OK for tomorrow and your DD is happy walking (a lot of kids that age really don't like being chaffeured by Mummy!) then your DM should butt out.

'Thanks for the thought, mum, but DD actually prefers walking' ???

Why don't you print this out and give it to her?

DD is lovely. (I might be a bit biased)

I was starting to think I might be being the Evil Mother, making her walk in all weathers. Mum does that to me, goes on and on about something, then when I stand up and say NO, I end up feeling guilty and second-guessing myself.

I will continue sending my poor little child out in hurricane winds and torrential rain, with only a ragged shawl for protection, and I will be guilt-free.

My mum rang me today (I'm 27) and panicked that I might WALK to the shop in 'THE HOWLING WIND!' lol

Bless

She thinks it might damage the baby. She has always tried to drive me everywhere lol

She is 14! FFS
YANBU

Mine dont get a choice, I can't drive.
Yes it's windy but she won't blow away

Kayano