to ask how you become organised and together? Seriously how??

[inatrance]

This is a question for any of you who used to be disorganised/flaky and are now organised and sorted. I have been like this for so long and I drive myself and everyone around me crackers. I'm unbelievably forgetful, I am late a lot and I'm rubbish with finances. I'm so fed up of cringing because I'm so bloody rubbish and make stupid mistakes all the time!

I've got an 8mth DS and a 10yo DD and while I've always had disorganised tendencies, since I had DS, it's gone from bad to ridiculous and I feel like I am constantly trying to catch up with myself.

I'm self employed (which is for the best as even I'd have sacked me by now) and have somehow managed to run my businesses haphazardly over the last ten years without fucking up too massively. Well, not often anyway...

Well, no more, I've had enough. I am using the New Year to kick me up the arse and I need your help.

If you used to be crap and are now brilliant and incredibly organised, please, please tell me how you did it. What changed in your mind and where the hell did you start?

Oh and another tip - bulk buy cheapie birthday/anniversary/occasion cards from Card Factory when they have their 7 for a quid offer on. I'm never without an appropriate card.

Sheepgomeep - get all your direct debits changed to be taken 3 days after payday

www.amazon.co.uk/Eat-That-Frog-Important-Things/dp/0340835044

Thanks for this thread - have taken quite a few tips from it & started to put them into practice today, along with getting the HomeRoutine app which looks great so far. Here's to a happy and organised 2012.

Ohdearnigel the only problem with that is I get paid 4 weekly, so every fourth friday. So I never get paid on the same date every month

bloodyasda

I must just say though, I am loving this thread. I do wish this could go in classics or something like that, its been so useful and rather inspiring.

Some great tips on here.

For years, people ASSUMED I was organised, but I knew the horrible truth!

Much better now, though, although currently up in the air as I'm struggling to finish a freelance project which consumes every waking child-occupied hour.

I have a husband with ADD and a 5 year old (put 4, forgetting it was his birthday yesterday).

My tips:

(1) Buying a label maker (I now have 2!) was a great idea. All the files etc are labelled, but so are the shelves in the pantry, understairs cupboard, toy boxes etc. I've a better chance of DH finding stuff and putting it away in the right place if he knows where the right place is.

(2) Ipod Touch is wonderful. As well as diary, reminder, notes it saves me no end of time to be able to check 3 email accounts without having to go to the computer. I also book DH's many business trips so the TripIt app is great for keeping all the details together.

(3) Online shopping and meal planning.

(4) Moving house! We moved from Singapore to Australia a year ago and so I had a HUGE declutter. It also gave me a chance to start from scratch in planning where things would go so as to put them in a logical place. As the house is about twice the size our apartment was it's easier to keep things organised. (The downside, of course, is it's a PITA to keep it clean!).

Keeping up to date with filing is incredibly cathartic. It's good to feel in control.

Lots of lovely ideas on here, now I just have to find the oomph to put them into practice....

I don't want to cast any aspersions about the pro-level organised types at all, but for the beginners, do we feel that there is any element of "the perfect being the enemy of the good" in play here? I'm trying to get some small things together and done, by just doing it without waiting for every surrounding circumstance to be perfectly aligned. For example, I've noticed that I rarely get an online grocery shop done, because I feel it should be possible to do it with a brilliant meal plan and complete shopping list in the background. Result, no shopping. If I start just ordering some bloody food on a regular basis, perhaps a shopping list system can wait, or will become apparent?

One day, I was faffing about and worrying about having to go to the bank to sort something out, and then I thought "just do it" and I did, and I stopped worrying. And that kind of started things off. so, instead of putting off things that are mundane and unpleasant, I try to do them ASAP (I have a rubbish memory) rather than putting it off, forgetting, remembering again, thinking about it, forgetting etc.

Start off with small things like that and build from there.

I try to put as much stuff into the diary in advance as possible. For e.g., DP and I had already planned in around late November, any days off we needed to book from work going up to end of December this year. This is because our employers operate on different years for leave (one runs Jan - Dec, the other July - June). So, I have all the dates for potential time off in already, and have booked as much as I can (also as there needs to be cover at work, so if I want that time off I need to get in early). Then put in birthdays and (my development for 2012!) put a reminder in a week before to buy a present/send a card (particularly as I have family all over the place) so it's done and arrives in time.

I have a massive massive spreadsheet with all my income and expenses listed, and again, as much as possible I put in any major expenses that are coming up so I can save for them. This is particularly critical at the moment, as we're getting married this year so we have to keep track of things that need to be done, and by when, when things HAVE to be paid for etc.

TheChristmasTree - that is exactly the kind of thing Flylady bangs on about - doing something is better than doing nothing, don't stress about it being perfect, that kind of thing. if you strip away the sink and shoes business (and the twee testimonials, and the buy my stuff emails), it's basically, pick one thing and do it everyday. Then once that's a habit, pick another thing and do that too. If you get bogged down with "I can't do x because I need to have already doen y and z", then you don't actually ever do x, and then you stress about it, and make it a much bigger thing that if you'd just got on with it in the first place.
WRT the shopping, yes, I think that gradually menu planning and so on would start to happen from the "just buying some bloody food", particularly if you did the shop on the same day each week, even if it's initially buying the same stuff each time. Because you then don't need to remember to do it, you have more head space to think about what's happening in that week, which nights do you need something super quick, oh look, such and such is on offer, maybe I could make two lots of whatever and freeze one, adn then a while down the line, you are on top of the food shopping/cooking stuff.

One thing I read before which is helpful when you are feeling a bit stuck is to make a list of those festering mouldy old tasks that are always nagging at the back of your mind.
e.g. in my case
A formal complaint letter
An outstanding bill
Tax return
Some items to be packed up and returned

And just do them. Once you have done them you will realise how much "head space" they were taking up. You feel like you have taken a weighted backpack off when they are gone.

I got a reminder for the outstanding bill today - which I could ignore - because I sent the payment yesterday. I felt smug relieved. I have also written the letter and an action plan for getting my tax return info collected together (already started). I have made a diary note to pack up the stuff on the weekend.

Now these things are being cleared i can start to focus on the next stage which is gradual decluttering.
Step 1 - no new clutter (chuck it out on the day if its not needed and one in one out)
Step 2 - eliminate a few things a day (even if its just 5 items that's 150 things gone in a month)

ChristmaasTree - I don't have meal plans! takes too long and is too much of a faff (imo). I shop as and when. I do buy meat in bulk though - and take it out of the freezer in the morning and spend the day considering what I'm going to do with it for the evening meal. Not all day mind you, just now and again. I've usually got a good idea by the end of the day and spend the journey home planning it so that when I walk through the door I've got it all planned out so it goes like clockwork.

I can't stress enough that planinng is the lazy way. I am constantly looking at ways to cut corners, to make everything easier. Without compromising quality of course

I can't stress how helpful this thread is. I am determined that I am going to get myself organised this year.

I have dyspraxia and I hadn't thought that dyspraxia might be part of the problem but I note that Xenia mentions on the thread that dyspraxia can play a part in lack of organisation so maybe it partly explains why things seem so difficult sometimes.

I had a small task to complete and because I haven't completed it or informed the relevant people of the delay it has now become a bigger issue. The first thing I need to do is send an email but for some reason a little panic sets in and my thinking becomes muddled so I don't know how to approach the task. Does anyone else get it this and how do you deal with it?

Sheep go meep - so you could have your direct debits changed to the 30th of the month then - your wages would be in by then wouldn't they ?
Alternatively set up another account, transfer what you need to cover your DDs from your wages and put the DDs onto it

christmastreesurgeon I think even some of us pro organised types suffer from perfectionism. I could spend hours devising better ways of doing something. I have to actively stop myself and restrict myself to scheduled reviews of things.

Thank you so much for this thread. We are going to start a family scrapbook for us now - thanks LeQueen. Putting some special handmade Christmas stuff in and some fun things the kids have made and things that we have seen over the festive period.

Am also on Flying thread and have downloaded HomeRoutines app today. AMAZING

Hazie - yes I do get this. Which is why I do my best to be organised so that I don't get into a confused mess! As for how to tackle it, imo the best thing is to just do it even if you're feeling panicky, just set to and do it. You can feel the stress levels coming down as you get into doing it instead of worrying about it.

Thanks springy, I suppose I just ought to send this dreaded email now then

oh yes

Have you done it yet Hazie?

I'm another could-be librarian! At uni, I'd come home from lectures and copy up my notes as I hated having messy ones. There are so many great tips on this thread (not read all so apols if already covered), but mine is DECLUTTER.
The less you have, the less messy and disorganised you will be. Spend January focusing on getting rid of things you no longer use or like (and old paperwork), then put the practical tips on this thread into practice.
I have a daily and weekly list of things that must be done - it really helps.

No.

I have written it down on my to do list.

[sigh] no, Hazie, that's not really the point now, is it? . Go on, do a draft of it, you'll feel a lot better.

do it, do it, do it