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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

worm dosing someone else's kids

49 replies

anonamuma · 31/12/2011 21:50

OK, so as I am not going out tonight I offered to babysit for a mum at the school. This woman's two children always have nits and are spreading them round the class. Their hair is never brushed or washed and they are literally crawling with nits.

AIBU to think it isOK for me to treat them without saying anything to their mum... She insists that she has treated them but we KNOW this to be rubbish, Her children have also been complaining of itchy bums and eating like they were starved, AIBU / WIBU to give them a worm dose...?

OP posts:
RandomMess · 31/12/2011 21:52

Well I'm not going to tell anyone if you don't

A1980 · 31/12/2011 21:52

I think you know YABU.

How would you like it if some other mother decided your kids were in dire need of a particular treatment and gave it to them without your consent.

If you have concerns for their welfare, report it to someone.

A1980 · 31/12/2011 21:53

The lice maybe, but actually giving them a worm pill. I wouldn't. There may be things you don't know about them. Other medications, etc.

MissMerrynder · 31/12/2011 21:53

I'd say ok to the nits, but as the worm stuff has to be ingested, probably not.

So, YANBU. ish.

Original poster
anonamuma · 31/12/2011 21:58

It's the worm stuff I was more torn about, the kids most definitely have worms and she says she treats them but she doesn't, I'm just really sick of my kids catching it back off them Hmm I know they are definitely not allergic to anything and on no medications...

OP posts:
GrahamTribe · 31/12/2011 21:58

You can't assume that sort of responsibility over someone else's children, you just can't. What if the children are allergic to one of the ingredients in the worm pill? That's aside from how their parents might react if and when they find out that you've dosed their children.

As A1980 says, if you have welfare concerns, report them.

sumum · 31/12/2011 22:01

no no no, you must not treat other people's dcs ever. you can comb through their hair with a nit comb but leave treatments well alone.

sprinkles77 · 31/12/2011 22:02

YABU. You just cannot medicate other people's kids. Anyway, you have to get a 2nd dose of wormer into the child after 2 weeks. You also have to boil all the bed linen, towels, pants etc. One dose of wormer will not do anything long term. OTH you might need to explain in intimate detail to your kids how the worms spread, and advise them to dry their hands on toilet paper, not towels when at school or at their dirty friends houses.

Original poster
anonamuma · 31/12/2011 22:05

It's soooo tempting to do, as I'm getting really sick of having to medicate my own children because of it Angry So annoying that one woman's disregard is causing practically every parent in the class to have to constantly do their kids hair and worm them...

OP posts:
ZeldaUpNorth · 31/12/2011 22:06

My dd1 (7) keepsgetting worms from somewhere, most possibly school as no-one else in the family gets them. If she went to stay at a friends house and they gave her a tablet for them i'd not be happy. Not sure if its bad if you take too much worming tablet?the mother might of only given them one yesterday... Carrots are meant to kill them so maybe get them some carrot juice?

ginmakesitallok · 31/12/2011 22:07

Giving them one dose of worm stuff isn't going to help though - unless you can babysit again in a fortnight and give them the second dose??

Nver · 31/12/2011 22:08

Even if you did chances of you getting rid of them slim. Parent probably has all too and then re-infect the kids. That's not all you have to wash sheets and clothing etc, then apply treatment 10 days later again. Not easy to get rid off!! I also agree with others - just to risky!!

LadyFlumpalot · 31/12/2011 22:31

I would be furious is another parent gave my son medication without consulting me. Then again, I would definately dose him up if he got worms in the first place and be mortified at the idea of him passing them on to someone else.

Just as an aside, suggest to the mum that she uses lavender and tea tree oil on her childrens hair, she might not like the idea of using chemicals and that is why they have not been treated for the nits?

LeBOF · 31/12/2011 22:34

This sounds suspiciously like research for an article to me, but hey, go for it if you think the kids won't grass you up...

ToothbrushThief · 31/12/2011 22:38

When the school took the class on a residential (age 8??) they 'discovered' nits and 'treated' them. They treated just a few children and I am absolutely sure it was on the same grounds as the OP -sick of dealing with the outcome of a parent not treating.

mrsjay · 31/12/2011 22:41

Treat the nits but the worm pill i wouldnt tell the mum they have itchy bums and she needs to get them checked asap , I dont think i could give a child medication without parents consent ,

Original poster
anonamuma · 31/12/2011 22:59

No not research to an article, just seriously p-d off mother :-/ had to demoted my kids hair at least once a month last year costing an absolute fortune (five kids 3 are girls) and when one of my kids gets it I treat them all, everytime it came from said mothers children... Worms a regular feature too, which is annoying because I wouldn't have to dose my kids up so much if she just treated hers, have spoken to her about it she agrees her kids have it and says she doses them but she doesn't, she is never with the kids always leaving them with other people just feel sorry for the kids and p-d off that mine keep catching it...

OP posts:
Original poster
anonamuma · 31/12/2011 23:02

*delouse stupid phone :-/

OP posts:
YonderRevoltingPeasantWhoIsHe · 31/12/2011 23:03

Children get worms Shock

spot the non parent

mrsjay · 31/12/2011 23:07

why do you look after these children if they are infested I would tell the mother that you wont look after them till she treats them the worms especially the nits sometimes take months n months to clear , FYI dont use trearment all the time nit comb every day with conditioner ,

marriedinwhite · 31/12/2011 23:08

If they are that bad why are you babysitting. Starts scratching.

nailak · 31/12/2011 23:23

Are you sure she doesn't treat them? I lived with ils for a while and dn constantly had note.even though we.checked.her hair every day, and the rest of the households hair on a weekly basis, and her mum wasn't shy of going to pharmacist nd getting free treatments for us all. They were some super strain

Goolash · 31/12/2011 23:31

Of course you cant go about giving pills to children. You know that? You do, right?

When are you going to treat them with the pills? Are they already in the house and you found them? I'd imagine it's for the follow up dose. Or Have you taken the pills with you? Then why?

If you have long term concerns about their health then research the appropriate actions to take. A chat to a parent orntake itnfurther. My boys have yet to get nits, no idea how weve escaped it. They both eat a lot, if I ate as much as them I would be huge, they're both in primary education, not teenagers. If think its very normal for some children!

I often think they have tape worms to explain the hunger but one of them seems to get the symptoms of thread worms every now and then. Ive read that a high percentage of the population have them, even over here and a small infection can sort itself out. I don't know if he reacts badly or reacts to something else, either way the poor boy is not happy. We usually manage by some product like vaseline around the area and careful changing of hand towels etc. No do not give these children cream for this purpose! It won't look good.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 01/01/2012 00:36

Anonamuma - can I suggest you try wet combing with conditioner, rather than using the chemical treatments, when your children get nits? You do have to repeat it over several days, but it is a darn sight cheaper than buying however many bottles of hedrin or whatever you must need each time.

I used to use a teatree conditioner, and bung in a bit of extra tea tree oil, and that helped a bit, I think.

The one thing I will say is that this will pass. None of my dses have had nits since going up to senior school - I assume that older kids just don't end up with their heads close enough to eachother for them to spread.

With regard to the worms - I agree that you can't give another person's children medication without their permission - I suspect your only choice is to tell the mum that whatever she's doing is just not working. Perhaps offer to go and help her change all the beds and boil wash the bedding? Not a fun thing to have to do, but if it stopped the worm infestation spreading from these children to yours, it might be worth it (or she might be so mortally offended that she forbids her children to have anything to do with yours, which would be sad, but might stop them catching nits off them).

A1980 · 01/01/2012 00:49

This doesn't sound right. The OP is too surprised that the kids keep getting worms. I had them as a child and we were clean and kept well and there was no obviosuly unkept and neglected child in my class. Kids just get worms.

Also why is the OP allowing lousy headed, worm ridden children to stay at her home? I don't beleive this OP is true.

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