Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think 6 and 8 is too young to get your own laptop and email address?

43 replies

joshandjamie · 29/12/2011 16:28

Found out my children's best friends got this for Christmas. I fully understand that kids need to use PCs for homework and it's a huge part of life now. But I feel that 6 and 8 is just too young. What do you get them next year?? Confused

Happy to hear otherwise. My son is going to turn 8 soon and would love his own PC but I have always said no - not for a good few years yet. Am I wrong? Should they have them this young?

(he can use my pc for homework when he needs to)

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 29/12/2011 16:30

You're not wrong and the parents of the other children are not wrong either

Buying them laptops at that age isn't something I'd choose to do...but everyone's different aren't they?

Insomnia11 · 29/12/2011 16:32

My 6 year old has an e-mail address but only so she can e-mail Santa! She doesn't use it otherwise. She hasn't asked for anything electronic for Christmas yet, and no I don't think it is necessary. One or two of her friends have DSs. I did a nine year old's birthday party recently and several of them had their own iphones, and I was a bit Hmm at that.

ladywithnomanors · 29/12/2011 16:35

My DS has a laptop and he's 6. He only uses it for Cbbc, Moshi Monsters and for playing games. He doesn't have an email and doesn't browse the internet on it.

marriedandwreathedinholly · 29/12/2011 16:37

Our DC got their own at about 13. In fact dd inherited DS's which was refurbished and he got a new one! They have both got Blackberries though but that's because the monthly contract had come down a lot when I was going to upgrade dd's phone for her 13th birthday.

Jinsel · 29/12/2011 16:40

Why shouldn't they have them this young? I'm just interested to hear the reasons, not being antagonistic here.

When my DSs were this age a 'cheap' computer was well over £1000 and a laptop was £1500 so they didn't get them for that reason

Original poster
joshandjamie · 29/12/2011 16:44

Jinsel - I guess because they have their whole future ahead of them being glued to a computer screen - whether it's for study, games or work. Perhaps I'm naively trying to keep them playing and being kids.

I also wonder whether they can find inappropriate things on the internet even with parental controls. And I wonder who the hell they're going to email! How many of their friends have email addresses? (although perhaps more than I realise!)

But perhaps I'm missing a trick and this is the age you're supposed to get them for them.

OP posts:
catsareevil · 29/12/2011 16:48

My children have had email addresses for years, I dont think that it is inappropriate. They dont use email unsupervised.

Its perfectly possible to play and be a kid on a computer.

jubilee10 · 29/12/2011 16:50

Well the boy along the road (approx 8) got a pedal go cart thing, he's already been behind my car twice. My stepson's 7 year old got hideous high heels. My friends children got tickets to Disney world - what can she get them next year? These parents are obviously happy with their choices but they are not for me. My Ds's 16,14 and 5 each have a lap top. The older two have e-mail addresses the youngest mostly uses it for Oxford Owl. I am happy with this. Each to their own. Strangely I didn't have any problems deciding what to get them this year.

RainboweBrite · 29/12/2011 16:53

Our DS got an email address on the family computer at 7 and at 9, has just got a netbook. If you don't feel comfortable with this just yet, you don't have to follow the crowd.

EdithWeston · 29/12/2011 16:57

I try to minimise screen time for children that age.

The youngest any of mine had a laptop was 11 (during year 6) and the youngest for own email (set up by me, all passwords to be shared) was 7 (during year 3, mainly for access to Doctor Who MI site stuff).

WorraLiberty · 29/12/2011 17:01

I don't get the surprise at the email address and you wondering why they're going to email.

How about family and friends?

For starters they'll probably be sending thank you emails to family and friends who have bought them gifts.

They may even have 'pen pals' across the world.

Jinsel · 29/12/2011 17:01

Well mine were happily using the pc for Reader Rabbit at 4/5 and if I'd have been able to afford it I wouldn't have ruled out a second pc for them to use. They were equally happy on their bikes or skates or the pc.

I think that computers are such a huge part of the world nowadays that a supervised introduction does no harm but I'm glad I didn't have to make the decision back when they were little :)

ChippingInLovesChristmasLights · 29/12/2011 17:02

My friends 7 yo got a laptop, I was a bit surprised at first as I thought she was very young and she is incredibly clumsy! However, as my friend said, she needs it for homework (all of their homework is emailed to them Hmm (state school as well)) and my friend is a bit fed up of her DD being on hers when she wants it and it has a lot of 'stuff' on it & didn't want to risk Miss Clumsy dropping it. Also it's easier to lock down the child settings on her DD's one & keep them locked down. So I guess it makes sense. I fail to see why any small child needs a phone though, unless it's to keep in contact with a NRP that the RP really doesn't want to speak to or they are walking/getting the bus home alone... but each to their own, my judgypants are busy elsewhere!! Xmas Grin

YouOldSlag · 29/12/2011 17:03

I'm 41 and I can't afford to have my own laptop therefore I don't think 6-8 year old kids should have them! It's a colossal luxury!

Sorry, I have just been trying to teach my 5yo about gratitude and counting his blessings. We all share a desktop PC in this house. A laptop at 6 or 7 or 8! Where will it end?

Giving kids too much too young just teaches them to want.

valiumredhead · 29/12/2011 17:04

Ds has had his own email address since he was 5 - he emails friends when we moved away and his granny and Aunty in the states.

He got a laptop for Xmas - he is 10 - would've got one earlier but until recently didn't have the spare cash and he used ours.

And to reply to your what next comment - some years ds has expensive presents and sometimes not so expensive presents

cookcleanerchaufferetc · 29/12/2011 17:04

Personally as long as the child, especially if very young, doesn't have the laptop in the confines of their bedroom, then each to her/his own.

valiumredhead · 29/12/2011 17:06

Giving kids too much too young just teaches them to want

No, parents' attitudes do that. 'Spoiling' is not about expensive presents.

squeakytoy · 29/12/2011 17:06

I cant see any problem with this as long as it is fully supervised by an adult at all times when used on the internet.

I used to love receiving letters in the post as a child, in the same way that a child these days probably loves getting an email off a relative. So long as plenty of parental locks are in place, then no harm can come of it.

valiumredhead · 29/12/2011 17:11

We have parent control things and ds is only allowed to use the laptop in our front room with us not in his room. He has been told that any deviation from this and the laptop will be taken away. Works for us.

tigerlillyd02 · 29/12/2011 17:14

It doesn't sit comfortably with me. I won't be buying DS a laptop at such an age. However, my 2 nieces age 5 and 6 were both bought their own laptops this christmas.

alicethehorse · 29/12/2011 17:14

Depends on the child, and the adults too!

DS is 3 and already wants his own computer as he sees me on it a fair amount, as I mumsnet am studying and work in web design.

When he is pretending to be me he says " I am mummy and I'm doing important work on my 'puter!"

I will get him a tablet as soon as they're affordable (they've made one in India for £35 so I imagine there will be cheap versions for kids on the market in the next copule of years).

I see it as an educational tool, and I'll be delighted to get DS one as soon as I can afford it. I would get him a tablet now if I could. (Seriously!) Although in reality I expect it'll be when he's 4 or 5.

As computers are such a big part of my life, and have such enormous potential for fun and learning I see no reason to stop him from exploring them too if he's keen, as soon as I can feasibly get him one!

I will of course monitor and guide his usage.

FWIW my family got our first family PC when I was about 8 or so, and I first learnt to write basic programs at 10.

SeasonsGripings · 29/12/2011 17:15

I don't see the big deal in this.

My dcs have had an email address since they were 5 years old, they use it sometimes to email their cousin and often to email dh - it's very sweet. As for owning their own laptop - we have 3 laptops in our house, ownership is fluid according to need and screen time would always be limited. Not worried about the escalation of presents either - my aim is never to blow their mind with amazing presents - just to buy them something they enjoy playing with.

lljkk · 29/12/2011 17:19

Email is so nearly obsolete anyway, it's all Facebook & texting now. I know someone that uses other media frequently (mobiles & FB) but don't even know how to run email. I can't remember the last time I had a truly social msg via email, it's all FB/texts or old-fashioned phone/letters.

Pupils are encouraged to use email at DC school from y4, they email classmates mostly, it's a social thing but the emailer they used didn't allow pictures & was easy for adults to review. DC also had own email addy & website even, from young age to maintain contact with remote cousins & grandparents.

I understand your general concerns OP, I just don't credit them because using email isn't that different from understanding how to use the phone, & it's possible to buy very cheap laptops, plus the parental-safety software with parental supervision about time is usually enough to ensure safety. That said, I'm pretty sure that Most parents don't even bother to set parental controls on their kids' DSis or mobile phones, so nothing that special about what a laptop could be letting them look at.

Now... one of DD's mates had her own iPhone from y4, I wouldn't be surprised if it had no or limited parental controls. The y4 child was known to use the phone in class to send texts to her mate in another classroom. I could see labelling that situation unsafe/excessive/indulgent/addictive/too unsupervised.

squeakytoy · 29/12/2011 17:21

I actually wouldnt buy new for a child, I think that is extravagant and unnecessary, but I would buy myself new and let them have the old machine.

I grew up getting things that way, and I still appreciated those things.

WorraLiberty · 29/12/2011 17:22

Same here squeaky

It's the same with mobile phones, the kids get handed them after we upgrade