My parents have been divorced for twenty years, most of them bitter and acrimonious and frankly bonkers toward one another. They are both remarried to lovely people but there seems to be a lot of unresolved problems between them. Lorks knows why, I'm disinclined, as the daughter, to find out but it manifests itself in outbursts and recriminations to my siblings and I along the lines of, "well I would be happier if your blooming blooming of a mother hadn't ruined my life, the evil bloomer".... you get the picture.....
Fast forward to now, it's my DD's first birthday soon. I was perfectly happy to arrange two occasions so they could both share it-separately-but both are saying they are happy to have ONE party and be...oh the terror...in the same house....at the same time.....
Lovely as it would be to have a functioning set of grandparents, acting in my daughter's best interests, I am frankly dubious that this will be anything less than a screaming match over the cake and candles. Am I being unreasonable and controlling to want to have two parties and ask them to sort out their differences off my turf? Or would it be a good opportunity in a neutral environment to let them scrap it out?