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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think that people who laugh at,criticise and/or complain about people who share nice things about their children are...

21 replies

bumbleymummy · 28/12/2011 19:24

just grumpy,miserable and/or insecure about themselves and their own children?

I have seen so many threads where people are having a go at others for daring to post or write anything complimentary about their children's progress at school or something that they happen to be doing well at the moment. Get over yourselves! There is nothing wrong with being proud of your children. Are you jealous that your child isn't doing as well or something? You just all sound so bloody miserable and bitchy. If you don't want to share your child's accomplishments then fine but why sneer at those who do?

I have not send out any round robins or anything like that by the way but I have read plenty of cards over the years from US relatives doing this with their children and it has never occurred to me that it is weird/braggy/boastful etc. I think it it nice to hear what people are up to! Surely I can't be alone in this...

OP posts:

EauDeLaPoisson · 28/12/2011 19:25

Ermm?

mrsmaltesers · 28/12/2011 19:27

Some people do write it in a way that they are genuinely proud ... Skme dk write it in a way that is genuinely braggy.

You could say ..... Dd played the recorder brilliantly at a school concert
Or you could put ... Dd got distinction in her grade 16 recorder. Etc.

Says me, the voice of reason. (joke)

Such a fat line between pride and smugness, imo.

Original poster

bumbleymummy · 28/12/2011 19:27

I take it you haven't read any of the 'round robin' threads EDLP?

OP posts:

Original poster

bumbleymummy · 28/12/2011 19:28

I don't see the problem with either of those MrsM. Maybe people just read too much into these things...

OP posts:

Ilovedaintynuts · 28/12/2011 19:29

YABU bragging is just annoying.

ChippingInLovesChristmasLights · 28/12/2011 19:29

I agree with you - totally. All of the RR sneering is pretty horrible. With the exception of the one where the writer is still banging on about some non event from 2004!

Original poster

bumbleymummy · 28/12/2011 19:30

What do you class as bragging though ILDN? I think people must draw their line in different places.

OP posts:

Original poster

bumbleymummy · 28/12/2011 19:31

Here's hoping for an eventful 2012 for them Chipping! :)

OP posts:

SauvignonBlanche · 28/12/2011 19:34

YABU to start a thread about a thread.

TheBlackDahlia · 28/12/2011 19:35

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being proud of your children. There is everything and more wrong with being smug and self satisfied about it. And the ultimate wrong is being braggy, loud and all 'supermummy'. I think I know which camp you might fall into OP.

HappyCamel · 28/12/2011 19:38

There's a lot of jealousy and inverted snobbery on here, same as anywhere really. Just ignore it, you can't change people.

2old2beamum · 28/12/2011 19:38

Funny old world isn't it? On Special Needs we rejoice at any child' success over here its boasting, mind you I loathe Round Robins.

Rudolfsgottarednose · 28/12/2011 19:41

OP i agree with you. I think as long as it isn't done in a way that puts other people's children down, it doesn't matter.

Also picking up that your toddler is ready to start leaning is a good thing. Some children do need the extra stimulation of learning/bounderies and not just playing, it might equal out, but i don't see how a parent can be critised for recognising that. Better that than a child stuck in front of a television, or strapped in a pram/high chair.

I see children in my work daily who have under achieved because of 'maternal deprivation', i would rather see PFB than a child not meeting milestones or having delayed development through bad parenting.

Original poster

bumbleymummy · 28/12/2011 19:42

I think you don't know much about me BD...my children are, of course, wonderful but I am definitely not a 'supermummy'!

Not a thread about a thread btw - a thread about several threads and tbh not just round robins. Too many people get accused of 'stealth boasting' about their children and all sorts on here simply for mentioning some sort of academic achievement - moreso academic than sporty/musical imo.

OP posts:

Original poster

bumbleymummy · 28/12/2011 19:43

Glad I'm not the only one who notices it and doesn't like it!

OP posts:

TheBlackDahlia · 28/12/2011 19:45

I'm afraid I just don't understand the motivation in boasting to a shitload of internet strangers. Obviously friends and family will be interested and maybe delighted at good news about your DC achievements but strangers? No - I'm sorry, I don't get it. And that, I think, is why it might be perceived as boasting.

Original poster

bumbleymummy · 28/12/2011 19:48

It may just be an outlet for some people though BD. I mean, why talk to internet strangers about anything really?

OP posts:

thepeoplesprincess · 28/12/2011 19:52

There's nothing wrong in being proud of your children. There's everything wrong in thinking everybody else is as interested in your children as your are.

Posting pics on Fuckbook everytime your kid eats/sleeps/stands-up/sits-down/farts etc is just sad and boring.

TheBlackDahlia · 28/12/2011 19:54

at 'fuckbook'

BandOMothers · 28/12/2011 19:55

I agree with you....some people are mostly positive though and can enjoy other people's pride. I see nothing wrong with sharing your happiness at your children's achievments...with relatives especially!

Letchlady · 28/12/2011 20:56

Now I totally disagree People's princess.

Many of my faceboook friends are people who I don't get to see all the time - we've lived in 5 different counties not all that far from each other - but over that time we've collected friends from where we have both moved on and away... but they are still dear friends, even though we may not see each other for quite some time. So sometimes, the only way I keep up to tabs with friends children often is through facebook - so for me, I really like it as a method of hearing how these children are getting on.

I also love hearing how they're doing, when they pass their swimming / dancing / gymnastics badges etc.... and I do not find it bragging.

For me, the distinction between smugness and proudness would be whether the parents also post the "Child has been a little shit all day and has really wound me up" posts. Then they're balanced - proud when there's something to be proud of, but not afraid to say it when they've been a little trying.

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