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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think we're all going to hell?

Kladdkaka · 2011-12-27T16:39:19+00:00

:o My sister and I wanted to go to church on Christmas day. Husband wanted to come too. Husband has a habit of falling asleep in church and snoring ... loudly ... and going 'WHAT! WHAT'S UP! WHERE AM I?' kind of thing when woken up suddenly. We live in a small rural community in Sweden. The church is a formal Lutheran one. Very puritan and serious in nature. (Christmas here is on the 24th as jovial celebrations are considered contrary to the austerity of the day.) So husband is read the riot act and allowed to attend on provision that there are no snorey shenanigans. During the reading from Isaiah I had to kick him hard because I could see he was nodding off. During one of the carols I saw him jump as my sister dug him in the ribs. But we were keeping him awake. Then during the sermon I heard the loudest snoriest snore ever. A part of me died inside of shame. I turned to poke him only to find him wide awake. The snoring was coming from somewhere else. [fshock] I caught my sister's eye and we both started to giggle. I turned away to try and get it under control but another big snore just made it worse. You know how it is with giggling, the harder you try to contain it, the worse it gets. I tried thinking of death puppies. You can't giggle and think of dead puppies at the same time surely? Another loud snore overcame the dead puppies and I'm crying trying not to laugh. By this time I'm a lost cause, my sister is lost too, husband is soon to be lost and daughter is laughing so much that she thinks she's wet herself. It couldn't get any worse could it? Oh yes it could. The elderly gentleman sat a couple of rows in front (church pretty empty only about 30 people) started to giggle too. Then the woman with him. Then the people behind us. The poor minister valiently tried to remain sombre as her entire congregation eventually rolled around in gales of laughter. Anyone know where I can get some teflon pjs? [fgrin]

13 replies

Kladdkaka · 27/12/2011 16:39

My sister and I wanted to go to church on Christmas day. Husband wanted to come too. Husband has a habit of falling asleep in church and snoring ... loudly ... and going 'WHAT! WHAT'S UP! WHERE AM I?' kind of thing when woken up suddenly.

We live in a small rural community in Sweden. The church is a formal Lutheran one. Very puritan and serious in nature. (Christmas here is on the 24th as jovial celebrations are considered contrary to the austerity of the day.) So husband is read the riot act and allowed to attend on provision that there are no snorey shenanigans.

During the reading from Isaiah I had to kick him hard because I could see he was nodding off. During one of the carols I saw him jump as my sister dug him in the ribs. But we were keeping him awake.

Then during the sermon I heard the loudest snoriest snore ever. A part of me died inside of shame. I turned to poke him only to find him wide awake. The snoring was coming from somewhere else. I caught my sister's eye and we both started to giggle. I turned away to try and get it under control but another big snore just made it worse. You know how it is with giggling, the harder you try to contain it, the worse it gets. I tried thinking of death puppies. You can't giggle and think of dead puppies at the same time surely? Another loud snore overcame the dead puppies and I'm crying trying not to laugh.

By this time I'm a lost cause, my sister is lost too, husband is soon to be lost and daughter is laughing so much that she thinks she's wet herself. It couldn't get any worse could it? Oh yes it could. The elderly gentleman sat a couple of rows in front (church pretty empty only about 30 people) started to giggle too. Then the woman with him. Then the people behind us. The poor minister valiently tried to remain sombre as her entire congregation eventually rolled around in gales of laughter.

Anyone know where I can get some teflon pjs?

OP posts:

LaurieFairyCake · 27/12/2011 16:41

I love moments like that, they're so rare.

God would be laughing his tits off too.

Bohica · 27/12/2011 16:44

So funny, inappropriate laughter is the best laughing!! Iyswim.

One of my funniest moments ever involved a small restaurant, a head teacher and an opera singer.

roastparsnipsandbrusselsprouts · 27/12/2011 16:52

Fantastic!

I once did it when I was supposed to be assessing someone as they did a performance. I put them right off and couldn't even apologise for laughing. I set the whole audience off too. I was so but still grin when I think of it. Poor girl!

SolidGoldStockingFilla · 27/12/2011 16:57

YABU because there is no such place. But YANBU for having posted this thread which is v amusing.

Ripeberry · 27/12/2011 17:06

One relative of ours is banned from any funerals as she laughs when nervous. Very inapropriate. But that thing in your church sounds fun!

AnotherMincepie · 27/12/2011 18:02

Winkly · 27/12/2011 18:22

Your husband is BU. An adult ought to be capable of behaving respectfully for an hour FFS.

You are not BU. Inappropriately funny stuff is twice as funny as appropriately funny stuff!

Binfullofgibletsonthe26th · 27/12/2011 18:32

My mate and I went to a play in Stratford starring Dame Judy Dench about 10 years ago.

He had had quite a hard shift beforehan and dozed off in the middle of it. We were two rows from the front of the stage.

During the performance Dame J clapped her hands together rather loudly. This woke up said bf and he started a rapturous one man applause at quite a tense moment in the plot as he thought it was the final curtain.

We had to sit there for another 45 mins, cheeks glowing furiously.

alistron1 · 27/12/2011 18:35

LOL!! When I used to go to a church (as a child) there was a woman in the choir who would do the most out of tune harmonies ever. Every week my mum and I would be literally dying with suppressed, uncontrollable laughter

DamnDeDoubtance · 27/12/2011 20:33

I want me some death puppies!

Original poster

Kladdkaka · 27/12/2011 22:09

I felt like the centurion in Life of Brian. 'Anyone fancy a giggle when I mention my friend Biggus ... Dickus?'

OP posts:

blackeyedsanta · 27/12/2011 22:25

once in a new church, I had the "pleasure of sitting in front of/next to a group of old ladies who warbled their way through the first verse of an unfamiliar hymn to an unfamiliar tune. (priming the laughter powder keg) unfortunately the tune of the chorus was all too familiar. half a line in I was giggling at "just one cornetto" and by the end of the first line I had collapsed onto my chair like a sack of spuds decending from a great height, there remaining as a quivering heap through the rest of the hymn and at least the first few minutes of the sermon. the preacher even commented on the tune obviously having different meanings for some people!
perhaps I should have walked out but by that time had last the use of my legs.

If God didn't like it, it is his own silly fault for giving me such a silly sense of humour.

I often wonder if they ever sang that song again.

OhdearNigel · 27/12/2011 22:50

have you got a handcart ?

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