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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to have a labioplasty?

46 replies

whyamilikethis · 26/12/2011 21:51

I have obviously namechanged for this.

Since having my dd I feel that my labia minora is larger than it used to be and rather unsightly. Is this normal? Before giving birth it never bothered me so much, but I did have one boyfriend comment on how 'flappy' I was. Now I am feeling really unhappy about how I look down there. I feel that that it looks stretched out and too big. I actually feel disguested by it to the point that I have started thinking about surgery.

OP posts:

BlissfulMistletoe · 26/12/2011 23:11

Go to the channel 4 embarrassing bodies website.

Also make sure you 110% want this as once it is cut off it can't be reversed

valiumredhead · 26/12/2011 23:16

Google post op infections.

stuffedauberginexmasdinner · 26/12/2011 23:26

You have a perfect, normal, functioning, sensory vulva.

Your 'problem' is psychosocial- change your head not your ladybits.

maighdlin · 26/12/2011 23:33

Yabu unless you have to fold them up to get them in your knickers then labiaplasty is a waste of time and money they are not exactly beautiful to behold in the first place

BastedTurkey · 26/12/2011 23:45

Sadly I think porn has a lot to do with womens feelings of self worth - or lack thereof.

Normal women do not and should not conform to this porn ideal of massive fake breasts, waxed fanjos, bleached anuses and snipped labia.

Labia are all different and anyone who is rude enough to comment doesn't deserve to be down there

Crosshair · 26/12/2011 23:50

I thought large labias where pretty common in the porn world. (Im not an expert or anything)

yellowraincoat · 27/12/2011 00:14

I've said this upthread, but honestly, a lot of labias in porn are not the tight, tucked-in things you might imagine.

D0G · 27/12/2011 00:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mumcentreplus · 27/12/2011 00:33

ham-bags....some big some small... but all doing a sterling job

Original poster

whyamilikethis · 27/12/2011 00:34

In answer to questions. Yes the bf who called me flappy is an ex, its not that he matters, its just I think that he planted that seed of doubt.

Right now I am not in a relationship, so the only person that sees it is me. I just hate seeing it when I go to the toilet/bathe and it can also be uncomfortable at times.

I had no idea it gets bigger as you age as well.. yikes!

My basis for what is normal natasha is based on my personal perception. I'm not comparing myself to porn, I just have an idea of what is normal that I hold, not sure where it came from. I think the issue is how much bigger I think it is now compared to before I had my dd.

OP posts:

AgnesBligg · 27/12/2011 00:38

Well, cosmetic surgery exists so that people can alter those bits of themselves they find imperfect in some way. Dangly labia my displease some but not others, so do your research and decide.

I have to say that after I gave birth to DC2 (my 2nd ventouse delivery, torn to shreds etc) the kindly consultants gave me a good trim in the area and when I eventually saw their handiwork I was quite delighted with it .

MillyR · 27/12/2011 00:44

I didn't realise until the last couple of years that small labia were considered more attractive than large ones.

ComposHat · 27/12/2011 00:45

I did have one boyfriend comment on how 'flappy' I was.

I trust that when Lawrence of the Labia made his comment that was the last time he got anywhere near it.

If there is any justice in the world he's now happily married... to his wrist.

CatPussRoastingByAnOpenFire · 27/12/2011 00:47

Its not something I think about. given the fact that I haven't seen mine for several years!

SebastionTheCrab · 27/12/2011 00:51

at Compos Lawrence of the Labia.

I feel slightly similar to OP. Not so much regarding the labia but about having vaginal tightening surgery. I just feel so loose down there after 3 children. I try to commit to the kegel exercises but find them so difficult and wonder if my pelvic floor is beyond help with exercise alone.

lovesadirtylie · 27/12/2011 01:48

try:
www.greatwallofvagina.co.uk/home

we dont see men worrying about their wrinkled scrotums now do we?

WorraLiberty · 27/12/2011 02:05

Well I don't know who you mean be 'we' lovesadirtylie but yes, I've certainly known men to worry about their ball bags stretching and their nuts hanging low as they get older.

ComposHat · 27/12/2011 02:09

Looking at this from a male perspective, I couldn't give a fat rats arse about what my partner's vulva looks like. In fact I wouldn't know or care what constitutes a large/medium/small vulva. Believe it or not, I have never heard another male mention a woman's vulva as a point of attraction/repulsion.

That wankstain of an ex-boyfriend sounds like a bully, playing on your own insecurity for his own twisted ends and his comment has nothing to do with your appearance.

Jacksmania · 27/12/2011 02:34

I've had the equivalent of a labiaplasty. DS's birth was one of those shitstorm ones, forceps, 3rd/4th degree tear, blah blah. I had my insides repaired when he was a year old, and they left my outside bits as they were at the time, to see how much of the pain I was having was from the internal damage. I had my external bits repaired Nov 2010, an episiotomy scar revision and what turned out to be a bilateral labiaplasty. I'd developed a plum-sized haematoma in one labia and when it was drained the labia never shrunk back, plus it was in two pieces from the episiotomy. So they basically reduced it to a nice size and sewed it back together, and then matched the other side.
I can tell you it was really uncomfortable for a long time. It felt like I'd been kicked in the crotch for weeks. There was a dull ache for months after when I accidentally wiped too hard. I learned to gently blot in a hurry! Was told no sex for 6 weeks - I think it took us 8 to get up the courage to try and I was sore after sex for a good four to six months.

Having said all that - it was worth it. My elephant ear labia caused me a lot of discomfort because it used to roll up on itself and feel rugged or caught. Finding jeans with a comfortable crotch seam was really hard.
And, while that wasn't my main worry, it did look odd and abnormal. So, I'd do it again, but was unprepared for how long it was uncomfortable after. Now, that may just have been me, but I just want to let you know, there could be more to it than you anticipate.
HTH. PM me for more details if you want.

itchywitch · 27/12/2011 04:29

This article was posted awhile ago and is quite interesting.

champagnevanity · 27/12/2011 11:08

WorraLiberty

Yeah i meant it as though it isn't a necessary procedure and im sure theirs nothing wrong with her fanny, and she shouldn't be feeling insecure about it,

i meant it as a contradiction, everyone says they'd like something done when their isn't anything wrong with the original. Now, a fanny job is a little different from a boob job, its a tucked away place, and im sure it isnt any different to anyone else's, i've seen loads of fannys - i'm not a lesbian, just have a lot of close girlfriends, each is very different from the rest.

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