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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Quick question!

17 replies

dukeofpork · 26/12/2011 19:43

AIBU to think it is out of order for my dh to have gone out every night except Christmas day for the past 2 weeks, leaving me at home with 3 month old and 3 year old? Am bored always sitting here on my own. (No point telling me to go out as 3 mo will not take a bottle!)

OP posts:
MrsSleepy · 26/12/2011 19:44

Have you spoken to him about it?

AnotherReasonToNameChange · 26/12/2011 19:44

YANBU at all.

happydotcom · 26/12/2011 19:45

YANBU

Is this normal for him to go out so much and leave you with your DC????

hellhasnofury · 26/12/2011 19:45

Have you told him how you feel? I don't think you are BU it shouldn't take much for him to figure out he's a parent too and needs to share the workload.

ZillionChocolate · 26/12/2011 19:45

I think it's a bit crap of him. Is he like this when it's not Christmas?

Seabright · 26/12/2011 19:46

YANBU, why is he out so much at the moment? A coincidence of friends being around? Or is he out a lot regularly?

Original poster
dukeofpork · 26/12/2011 19:46

Going to broach the subject tomorrow so just looking for a bit of perspective. Thing is I am don't stay up late anyway and don't drink ATM. I think he finds it boring at home. It probably is.

OP posts:
Soupqueen · 26/12/2011 19:46

Yadnbu

Have you spoken to him about it?

ClaraSage · 26/12/2011 19:47

Very wrong and unfair of him. Does he not understand or is he simply not interested in family life?
(or is he from the 1950's?)

NatashaBee · 26/12/2011 19:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
dukeofpork · 26/12/2011 19:51

The thing is he is pretty hands on with the kids when he is here, often baths 3yo before he goes out and always gets up with him in the morning, no matter how hungover he is or how little sleep he has had. And Christmas is busy socially. So should I just cut him a bit of slack?

OP posts:
Original poster
dukeofpork · 26/12/2011 19:53

And Natasha I am breeding a boob monster/bottle refuser so not up for going out myself, just want some company at home really.

OP posts:
Original poster
dukeofpork · 26/12/2011 19:53

Breastfeeding - not breeding Blush

OP posts:
ClaraSage · 26/12/2011 19:56

He needs to stay in, maybe he doesn't realise that you want him there in the evenings. Tell him.
Mine were all bottle refusers, fine by me as i hardly see them now (teens). Job well done. In the evenings,I sat around breast feeding, DH got the coffee and changed the nappies.

FabbyChic · 26/12/2011 19:59

He is not a single man who can come and go as he pleases he has a family and a wife

Kick him into touch its not on.

Can you afford for him to go out so much for a start. Is he an alcoholic?

Original poster
dukeofpork · 26/12/2011 20:13

We are comfortably off but not rolling in it. Of course the money could be better spent on other things.
He definitely drinks a lot sometimes but is capable of going long periods without a drink. He also smokes a fair bit of weed. (often when he is at home too - on his own obviously - I find that weird, annoying and a little bit pathetic tbh).

We have a cleaner so it is not like he is leaving me at home slaving away - I usually just sit on the sofa bfeeding on and off all evening.

OP posts:
Sidge · 26/12/2011 20:19

Even if it is a bit boring, he should suck it up really. Christmas is family time.

Watch a film, play a game, (something you can do sitting down feeding like Trivial Pursuit or Scrabble!) or just slob out in front of the TV.

If he can't go a few nights without going to the pub then he's got a problem.

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