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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think parents should take their child out of the theatre if they are crying so it doesn't ruin it for everyone

25 replies

PrincessScrumpy · 23/12/2011 14:01

I took dd1 to the panto yesterday. Now, I accept kids are excited and expect some behaviour issues but hope parents will sort them out, and mostly they did. But, two rows infront of dd1 (3.5) and I was the front row with a mum and dad and their 3 kids. 2 of them were well behaved but the youngest was, imo, too young at about 18 months (if that). She was screaming and crying and the parents were switching her from one to the other, shoving her dummy in and sweets to try to stop her, but it didn't work.

I really feel that one parent could have stayed with the other two while the other one took the young girl out. The panto cost me £30 for the two of us and although it won't break the bank, it is still not what I call cheap, so I feel the parents should have removed their child to calm her down and perhaps moved closer to the back/exit (there was space to do this).

The child spent any time she wasn't crying wither her face hidden in her mum or dad's chest, bust mostly she just cried (loudly).

The boy next to us also cried when the wicked step mother came on but his mum took him out.

Am I just being grumpy?

OP posts:
MorrisZapp · 23/12/2011 14:04

They still have wicked stepmothers in pantos?

Christ.

101North · 23/12/2011 14:08

YANBU.

Why didn't you suggest it to them at the time though?

Original poster
PrincessScrumpy · 23/12/2011 14:10

I wasn't close enough and we were mid row.

Difficult to do Cinderella without a wicked step mother - have you ever been to a panto?

OP posts:
Kladdkaka · 23/12/2011 14:23

YANBU

OH YES SHE IS!

slavetofilofax · 23/12/2011 14:25

YANBU. Some people are just plain selfish.

AllGoodNamesGone · 23/12/2011 14:29

YANBU. Not fair on the little girl or anyone else. She was presumably frightened by the dark, the noise, all the people etc etc. It's a shame for the parents but they should have taken turns entertaining her in the foyer so their other two children could enjoy the panto.

I had to leave many a thing when mine were small, or DH did, and it's miserable but that's just how it is when you have tiny ones.

Beamur · 23/12/2011 14:30

YANBU.
I 'watched' several films now in the cinema lobby while DP watched the end and I comforted DD - she has a very low threshold for cinematic danger..

ConOfScience · 23/12/2011 14:34

I took my dd to a panto last week - she's 15 months.

I even started a thread about whether I should take her or not because unlike the couple you are speaking of, I would never dream of ruining viewing for anyone else.

This couple were being unreasonable.

I also believe that an attendant should have asked the parents to remove the child.

Original poster
PrincessScrumpy · 23/12/2011 14:34

I took my dd to panto last year when she was 2 (almost 3) and I knew it was a gamble but was prepared to leave if necessary. We also ensured our seats were not to far forward and near an exit - just common sense. Glad I'm not the only one who thought this.

OP posts:
quirrelquarrel · 23/12/2011 17:06

Surprised they weren't behind you, really...

YANBU- but people don't realise how bothering it is for others too. You're just there in the moment, trying to stop the noise, it can be overwhelming.

callmemrs · 23/12/2011 17:40

Sign of a successful wicked step mother!!
Seriously , the boy crying when the step mother came on isn't too awful (as long as he was quickly hushed). The parents who kept an 18 month old there screaming and crying and plainly not even watching or interested in the panto were plain selfish. I would have alerted theatre staff and told them you'd be asking for a family refund if they didn't sort it

valiumredhead · 23/12/2011 18:16

YANBU

birdsofshoreandsea · 23/12/2011 18:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LIZS · 23/12/2011 18:23

yanbu and the parents showed a selfish disregard for other pantogoers.

yellowraincoat · 23/12/2011 18:24

YANBU, this is one of my pet hates

Gonzo33 · 23/12/2011 18:36

My dd is 22mths and I took her this year. I was very worried that she would get upset, but she loved it. If she had created I would have taken her out though.

OrmIrian · 23/12/2011 18:38

YANBU. Anyway if they are so traumatised that they cry for more than a minute or so, they aren't enjoying it, and let's face it no adult would choose to go to panto unless they were trying to please a child

Sparklingbaubles · 23/12/2011 18:41

YANBU. People are just so selfish. If you had been able to say anything you would probably have got a mouthful. Sad

BleurghUna · 23/12/2011 20:22

YANBU. I once went to a musical where a baby or toddler was crying all the way through. The actor playing one of the main parts was clearly being distracted by the noise and eventually had to shout at the woman (in his "normal" voice, effectively interrupting the play) and tell her to remove the child, which she duly did. I was amazed that she didn't think of it before! People should think of the actors, they find it a nuisance too!

redpanda13 · 23/12/2011 20:59

YANBU
I took DD to the ballet yesterday. I booked seats beside the aisle so that if she did get restless then I could quickly remove her with minimum annoyance to others. She sat well but better to be prepared.

MissBetsyTrotwood · 23/12/2011 21:12

YANBU at all. Especially not if there were two parents there as well.

We had a theatre trip yesterday with two mouthy little brats fidgety girls sitting behind us. The dad of one of them was there and for some reason the other little girl's mum dropped her off but didn't stay. We waited a few minutes for it to start during which time the parentless child slumped in her seat, arms crossed and shouted 'I am SO bored, this is RUBBISH.' I could feel my cat's bum mouth beginning to pucker. Then, as the show opened she leant forward and started prodding my DS1 in the back of the head and whispering something in his ear. Her friend was giggling. Cat's bum mouth in full effect now I turned around and hissed 'BE QUIET and SIT DOWN'.

Her friend's dad did nothing throughout. But she didn't bother us again. Xmas Grin

Sorry to rant; just wanted to explain why I share your annoyance.

Madeyemoodysmum · 23/12/2011 22:45

YANBU. had the Same problem a month back with a toddler at ballet
At panto or sat morn flicks I'm more tolerant but at ballet I was very pissed off as the usher was useless and did nothing

Anyway I wrote and complained to the theatre and got 4 sets free cinema tickets If we put up with this sort of thing it will never change. Complain complain complain is my new motto!!! (exit Scrooge)

mummymeister · 23/12/2011 23:06

Having just taken a 10 hour flight to the USA where the twin girls in the seat in front of me screamed (yes really, not just crying !!) the whole time whilst the mum read her book because she wanted some "me " time and the dad had his headphones on the whole time i definately do not think you are being unreasonable!

ContraryMartha · 24/12/2011 04:34

YANBU! Utterly selfish.

My pet hate too. And I would have made the theatre attendant do something.

Years ago I had front row seats to a Postman Pat concert, but 2 year old DS kicked off because he wanted to go onstage and pat the black and white cat.

We left ten minutes in. Can't understand why anyone would stay tbh.

Original poster
PrincessScrumpy · 24/12/2011 19:48

My brother flew from Canada to England where a woman on the flight with a young baby was completely unprepared expecting the flight to provide baby food - the passengers near her donated the carrots from their meals to mash up for the clearly hungry baby!

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