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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

teacher confiscated ds's ipod - so pissed off!

50 replies

ipodrage · 21/12/2011 16:37

OK, normally v. supportive of teachers and appreciate their often difficult job. DS (12) went into school for an after school class he has. Class was cancelled. A teacher saw his headphones and confiscated the iPod (He has been listening on his way to school and had only just walked in and was in the entrance area). Only way to get it back is for me to schlepp to the school and personally collect it from the secretary.

Only 1.5 days left of school before holidays, and like everybody else, I have tons to do and frankly it's a huge pain in the arse.

Obviously I understand it's designed to be a pain in the arse so parents rant at their kids and kids don't do it again.

But, considering it's Christmas coming up (bah bloody humbug to you miserable cow teacher), such a tiny window for me, who has done nothing wrong to have to get there, otherwise 2 weeks without, and we're going away, and It's expensive and concerned about it getting robbed. BUT, for me the key is most of all, school was over anyway, it's not like he was sitting in the back of his lesson or in assembly baring out music and not paying attention, AIBU to be so pissed off about this?

And do I just (kill myself trying to fit it in) meekly collect it, or call her and let her know my thoughts on the topic?

OP posts:
HauntedLittleLunatic · 21/12/2011 16:40

Depends what the actual school rule is.

At mine the rule is none on the premises which has been broken. However I would have told him that I would turn a blind eye once and given him a chance to get rid.

LaurieFairyCake · 21/12/2011 16:41

Yabu

He was entering school, he knows the rules. And the rule of the parents going to fetch it is a damn good one.

You know you don't have to go, right? Wait til January if you haven't time. It's not YOUR fault Grin

Original poster
ipodrage · 21/12/2011 16:43

well, if it was a book or something I would, but A. it's expensive and I'm worried about leaving such an expensive item, and B. as we're travelling a lot, I think it's unduly harsh, and would be a massive pain for him and me) to be without for the long journeys.

OP posts:
LaurieFairyCake · 21/12/2011 16:43

I wouldnt go until it was convenient for me.

Dd took her phone out in lesson, it was confiscated. I didn't collect it for 8 days as it wasn't convenient.

Dd is not allowed out without her phone so she didn't go out for those 8 days.

Natural justice Grin

LaurieFairyCake · 21/12/2011 16:45

School are responsible for it, it will be fine. Call them to let them know you know and for them to keep it safe.

diddl · 21/12/2011 16:45

Can he really not get it back after school tomorrow?

If not leave it until it´s convenient for you.

If it was a school run after school club I assume that school rules still apply.

So YABU.

TheFallenMadonna · 21/12/2011 16:46

I wouldn't confiscate it after school, but that's because it wouldn't be against our rules to have it then. I wouldn't be much swayed by the proximity to Christmas argument though

AFuckingFestiveKnackeredWoman · 21/12/2011 16:46

YABU he should of left it at home. Its his fault not hers.

Original poster
ipodrage · 21/12/2011 16:47

ok, but in your example she got it out in a lesson, which was asking for trouble/ taking the mick. DS wasn't in lesson, in fact, it was after school, so no lessons were taking place anyway. Quite honestly, it's never going to be convenient for me to go. I only ever go there for parents evenings etc when the office is shut anyway. so whenever I go it will be inconvenient.

Local nursery nearby just got broken into and robbed on Monday, so I have real concerns about the security and potential loss of item.

OP posts:
Dustinthewind · 21/12/2011 16:47

Usually we point out that basic school rules such as running in the corridors, or trying to punch someone, even if he's your brother, still apply on school premises whatever the time. And yes, it is supposed to be massively inconvenient so you pass your rage onto your son for forgetting.
Perhaps he argued the point? I'd phone up politely and see if there is room to negotiate. What is he likely to be like without it for two weeks?
Will it be more of a PITA to put up with him without it than to collect it?

tabulahrasa · 21/12/2011 16:48

If it's been confiscated by a teacher and given to the secretary it'll be locked up until you collect it, so it's not likely to be stolen.

It should be him you're annoyed with anyway

knockneedandknackered1 · 21/12/2011 16:48

bit unfair has the school was closed scrooge

Original poster
ipodrage · 21/12/2011 16:49

pissed off with him. pissed off with her. fair's fair.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 21/12/2011 16:51

If the school rules say not on school property then he deals with the consequences of getting it out. Yabu

pantomimecow · 21/12/2011 16:52

I thought they had to give confiscated items back after school, unless it's a knife or something similar obviously.I would check out the legals on that.

Original poster
ipodrage · 21/12/2011 16:54

he didn't have his iPod out. He had headphones round his neck, iPod was out of sight in jeans pocket.

but I suppose that's splitting hairs.

If it weren't for upcoming holiday and recent robbery I think I would feel differently.

OP posts:
UnexpectedOrangeInMyStocking · 21/12/2011 16:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LaCiccolina · 21/12/2011 16:58

Just to put a spanner in the works of those believing its locked up so safe, it isn't. It might be locked up BUT the one big rule of all government buildings is BRING YOUR STUFF AT YOUR OWN LOSS, i.e. it goes walkies then the school aint responsible! This definitely stands if said gov official has locked up said expensive item. They would not accept personal responsibility. Try it if you don't believe me...braver person than me.

Id get the thing back first, then walk round to the teachers room and 'discuss' it. Inverted commas are yours to keep or remove depending on whether you now feel xmassy or scrooge now about it....

Making child regret taking it to school and making your life hell is also an option. Enjoy that one too.

Or you could just let it all slide off your back Karma like.....and open a bottle of white.... Cheers!

gettingeasier · 21/12/2011 17:00

Sounds like hes been unlucky but at the end of the day it shouldnt be anywhere near school

I have this with DD and last time it happened I let it remain in the school safe 10 days before collecting as a deterrent, dont think its made any difference Grin

You are a bit unlucky it so close to the holidays so you need it but YABU to blame school

Have a lovley holiday !

woahwoah · 21/12/2011 17:00

He broke a school rule and is suffering the consequences. I think you should be directing your understandable annoyance at the inconvenience towards your DS, not the teacher.

I know it's just before Christmas, but does that mean rules don't matter then? Where should she draw the line? OK to confiscate in any month except December? Ok to confiscate if she checks first that it's convenient for the parent? I know I'm exaggerating here, but really?

If the teacher lets something go, it just makes it harder for her and every other teacher in that school next time ('well, you didn't take X's away, so why are you taking mine?). If you hadn't guessed, I'm a teacher. Xmas Smile

Sirzy · 21/12/2011 17:04

Hopefully in future your Ds will leave it at home when he goes to school then there won't be a problem!

TheFallenMadonna · 21/12/2011 17:04

You wouldn't be able to walk round to my room to "discuss" it with me. If you had a complaint, you'd be dealt with by one of the leadership team.

Original poster
ipodrage · 21/12/2011 17:04

I think I'd draw the line at it no longer being school time.

OP posts:
Original poster
ipodrage · 21/12/2011 17:05

fallenmadonna, I don't understand your post?

OP posts:
corlan · 21/12/2011 17:06

Look at it another way - be grateful your son goes to a school where they enforce the rules.
I work in a school where the rules are not enforced and students have their phones out in lessons, some teachers let them listen to music - nobody knows where they stand.
I'm absolutely serious - be grateful, I bet it's a good school!