To be upset with DH's family

[Newmummytobe79]

In a nutshell.

DH had an argument with family - all sorted now before Christmas, which I'm very pleased about.

I supported him (it was about parenting so was aimed at me too) but still took the DC to see GP's so they could see baby.

FIL wasnt really involved but apologised to me (was mainly SIL) - I thanked him and thought this very sweet.

SIL is now being overly nice to DH but hasnt really bothered with me. I have sent an invite from my family to her re a party over the Christmas period - she text DH her acceptance.

I also text FIL about the invite and am yet to recieve a reply. (If I don't reply to his in a matter of hours he sends the text again)

Am I being unreasonable to expect a response?

I'm annoyed as I've put a lot of effort in re presents, personalised cards (they love this kind of thing!) etc but feel as if my efforts to keep the peace during the row are now forgotten. I wish I'd not bothered.

Just feeling sorry for myself really and a bit annoyed that DH now sees them all through rose tinted glasses as he got the apology he so very much wanted.

Don't want to be off with them all on Christmas Day - so will probably just let it slide. But I'm still mad/a bit upset!

Is this to be expected as I stayed out of it really, so it's now just being brushed under the carpet?

AIBU?

What are you actually upset about?

The fact that I kept things sweet whilst the row was going on and now it's all sorted I don't hear back on anything I do (invites, cards etc) - all the thanks goes to DH.

So you've invited SiL and FiL to a Christmas party. SiL has replied (albeit to DH, sounds like she feels awkward around you). FiL has not replied. When did you send the text? Has he actually got it? Dare I suggest you might ring him up and ask him if he can come (there sounds like there are no issues between the 2 of you)?

If you kept out of the row, why do they need to be any different with you than they would usually be? (grovelling etc?)

Has your DH made the effort to thank you? He's the one that should be grateful of your efforts!

Text messages are the problem here. Ring people and actually speak to them.

People dont often see texts, they are easily missed, and easily forgotten.

As for you SIL, the party is a family party being hosted by both you and your husband isnt it? So she replied to him... it doesnt matter who she replied to, at least she replied to one of you. He let you know about it, so I dont see any need to get upset there either.

Yes he has actually - so I guess I should just stop worrying.

Maybe him looking after his side of the family will take a bit of Christmas stress off me :)

Thanks for putting it into perspective. It's been a bad week and I think I'm letting things get carried away in my head.

tonight I think!

They're probably feeling a bit sheepish and unsure of thir welcome. Keep being nice and sending olive branches and it should blow over, you don't want it festering for years so you're right to let it slide.

It's only natural SIL has replied to DH and perhaps FIL has missed text, forgotten about it etc. Just ring him. I think you are worrying about nothing, particularly as the row has been sorted.