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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be pissed off with my kids' dance school?

28 replies

Thruaglassdarkly · 16/12/2011 02:48

Ok, my DD1 (7) and 2 (3) go dancing once a week. For 45 minutes, I pay £4.50 per child. We live in the Midlands.

It was announced a couple of weeks ago that classes wouldn't be held as normal on the last Saturday of term (10th Dec despite having already paid for them with no chance of refund!) Instead there would be a disco.

FastForward to the disco. It was arranged by the senior girls, so was full of club music. My DD1 spent most of it in tears. DD2 was similarly bored. There was ONE game the whole time they were there and they were served a cup of squash and a biscuit. Within less than an hour my kids had come home as they were so fed up.

AIBU to be annoyed that I paid £9 for two lessons that never happened and that in their place, was a teen disco and a cup of squash and a biscuit instead of the lesson I'd paid for? I have half a mind to write to the principal. The whole thing was made worse when DD1 went for her swimming lesson yesterday, only to find they had minimal life-guard staff on (so little that I had to sit poolside to check on DD1, who is a very new swimmer) and had just chucked a load of floats in the pool and called it a Christmas party.

AI also BU to think that if you pay for lessons in something, your kids should bloody well get them, regardless of the time of year.

OP posts:

McPhee · 16/12/2011 02:55

Nope. I'd be pee'd off too!!

Gigondas · 16/12/2011 03:04

Nope Yanbu - that's poor

skybluepearl · 16/12/2011 07:11

I'd expect a 30 min lesson followed by musical statues and then simon says with the girls taking the lead.

our swimming pool had a end of term party but it involved lots of games in the water - they were still swimming lots and felt it was special. Happy all round.

skybluepearl · 16/12/2011 07:12

and maybe being sent home with a cookie as a treat?

bejeezus · 16/12/2011 07:22

But you need to tell them- or they won't know the girls and the parents feel like that. They most likely think the kids enjoyed the disco

exoticfruits · 16/12/2011 07:25

All classes generally end with a party. I think that every set of swimming lessons ended with a fun session. I can't speak for dance, never having had a DC at dance lessons, but I think that it is the norm to relax at the last one.
You will now know what happens in future, so you have the choice of stopping the lessons. I wouldn't expect to change it-they have probably been doing it for years-since they started.

ContraryMartha · 16/12/2011 07:32

YABU.
My kids would have been thrilled with a disco - a chance to practice their dance moves.

bruffin · 16/12/2011 07:46

Dcs swimming always had a fun swim, starting off with a few fun races then playing with floats. DCs always looked forward to it, even us adults who have lessons have a fun swim at the end of term

Bloodymary · 16/12/2011 07:48

Well I do see your point about the dance 'class', and I think you have every right to complain about that.
The swimming 'lesson' would not have bothered me that much tho, (in fact I am wondering wether that will be the extent of little girls swimming class tomorrow).

belgo · 16/12/2011 07:48

YANBU. If you pay for a dance class, then you should get a dance class.

The disco should be optional.

exoticfruits · 16/12/2011 07:48

The fun swim was the one that mine really looked forward to at the end of term. It is also really good for water confidence.
I would have thought that the disco was similar-why are they learning to dance if not to use it? Maybe the problem was that they had all ages and needed to split it.

exoticfruits · 16/12/2011 07:51

YANBU. If you pay for a dance class, then you should get a dance class

I expect that had you asked before you paid you would have found out that there was a disco for the last session.
I feel so sorry for DCs, life is so serious these days! It has always been the norm for classes to relax with a party at Christmas. Any adult class that I have done has been the same.

slavetofilofax · 16/12/2011 07:52

Why was your dd crying?

I can understand that a disco might not have been their thing, but plenty of little girls would have loved a disco so I don't think the school did anything wrong for having a Christmas party.

I would be annoyed at the pool for not having enough supervision, but I don't think they were wrong to have a party either. My dc love the end of term parties at the extra clubs they attend.

exoticfruits · 16/12/2011 07:53

I go to several adult things at the moment and the discussion is 'what should we do for the last one before Christmas'-luckily we don't have any killjoy saying 'we have paid for our normal session-we must have our normal session'-bah humbug!!

belgo · 16/12/2011 07:55

There's nothing wrong with having a disco, as long as it is optional. That's fortunately what happens at my dds' dance school.

During the last lesson of term, the parents are invited in to watch the dance class, so the children have a chance to show off their dancing.

bruffin · 16/12/2011 07:58

The teachers should be qualified lifeguards, as they are not teaching they would be acting as lifeguards from the side.

RealLifeIsForWimps · 16/12/2011 08:06

I think YABU- sorry.

They're just doing something a bit fun for Christmas. To be fair, it sounds like the disco wasn't that well thought out (mixed ages) but the float party sounds fun- I thought all kids liked inflatables.

DuchessofMalfi · 16/12/2011 08:07

I wouldn't go so far as to say YABU because clearly your DC didn't enjoy the disco. My DD is 5 and is just starting to enjoy disco parties, but these are specifically for children of her age group. I would agree that DD wouldn't enjoy a disco for older children.

As for the swimming lesson, if they didn't have enough lifeguard staff, surely that is grounds for complaint as it isn't safe. At DD's swimming lessons, they had the last one this week and the lesson was a normal one up to about 10 mins before the end when they brought out the floats for playtime.

exoticfruits · 16/12/2011 08:10

When you say 'minimal' lifeguard cover they must have had enough for the law.

Floggingmolly · 16/12/2011 08:15

It's true, any 'block' of organised lessons traditionally end the Christmas term with a party. There are certainly good parties and bad parties, but it was a little excessive for your dd to spend the session crying, surely?

belgo · 16/12/2011 09:19

'It's true, any 'block' of organised lessons traditionally end the Christmas term with a party. '

that is such a typical British attitude. You are expected to enjoy these parties whether you like it or not. And if not, you are accused of being a party pooper, kill joy etc.

How many of you have been to an office party/ hen party because you felt obliged to go, and you would rather have been at home with a take away?

Why shouldn't the OP expect a lesson when she has paid for a lesson?

squeakytoy · 16/12/2011 09:26

Why was your 7 year old in tears???

ledkr · 16/12/2011 09:57

I used to teach dance and we always had a fun session at the end which we didnt di normal lesons in,as classes or the parents came to watch.My dd is in a show at the mo so lessons have been cancelled but she's loving the show so its swings and roundabouts tbh. At this age its as important for them to get some social enjoyment from dance as well as it builds confidence.
The issue is the unsuitability of the disco for the ounger children which you are right to address with the principle.

Original poster

Thruaglassdarkly · 16/12/2011 11:39

Thanks for your replies everyone.

There were a lot of the younger kids just standing around at the disco. My dd was crying because she wanted the older girls to play with her as she was bored but naturally they wanted to dance. The school do run a disco class and a disco would be a great idea for those kids to get to bust their moves. However, a lot of the younger girls were standing around not joining in. They do ballet, so didn't really have any moves to bust to club music iyswim.

My issue (very unclear in my OP perhaps - late when I posted after a or two) is NOT so much that they had an end of term party. More that it wasn't very appropriate to the different ages. Had my DDs been teenagers, or learning disco I'd have been more than happy. But I think for the younger ones there should have been some more games, appropriate music they were used to dancing to and a sandwich or something, for £4.50 I mean. I'd have rather they had a lesson than what they got.

The swimming wasn't such an issue as DD1 ENJOYED herself. I just threw it in to the OP as another example. I wish I hadn't now as it benefitted her water confidence immensely. But I might mention to the dance school that they should think a bit more about the younger kids when they have a party. The school had let the teenage students plan it I think.

OP posts:

littlesez · 16/12/2011 11:54

I am a dance teacher. YANBU the disco should be additional make sure you complain x

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