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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to have a little moan about DH's work?

15 replies

LRDtheFeministDragon · 15/12/2011 19:29

DH has worked for them for just over two years, first on a temp contract then made permanent. He's now got a team of people he's in charge of but still earns just over minimum wage. In the summer he and his immediate boss had a meeting and agreed the boss would look into getting him a raise. Boss came back to DH saying that other people doing the same sort of job in other companies are being paid a lot more and so he was confident of getting DH a raise.

Company said he'd get a raise in October. Come October, they said actually they'd backdate it to October because they still hadn't agreed how much it would be. So they said for convenience they'd give him the backdated raise money on the 23rd of December along with his Christmas bonus, and they'd let him know how much it would be in November.

Come November, they say no, still haven't decided how much it will be, they'll let him know the end of this week (ie. tomorrow). Today they've said no, sorry, it'll be on Tuesday, promise.

I keep mentally reducing how much I'm hoping it'll be and getting more and more nervous they could keep on fobbing him off/turn round and say they won't give him a raise. Do you think that's likely? No experience here so I don't know! DH would look for jobs elsewhere if he felt pushed but he's too easy-going and I suspect they know this. And if it's true other places pay more they must feel they're onto a good thing with him. AIBU to feel fed up?

(Yes, I know we're very lucky he has a job, etc. etc. It's just getting me down because he works so hard for not much.)

OP posts:
itsbrandybutterandtinseltime · 15/12/2011 19:30

I get you. It must be hard for you. I think a lot of people are working hard for peanuts these days.

BsshBossh · 15/12/2011 19:35

Could you find out what it could be earning on same role at other companies and show the list to your DH? Would it have any impact on him at all?

LostVagueness · 15/12/2011 19:40

BsshBossh.....wouldn't that just piss him off even more. It's hot the DH's fault. Sounds like they intend to pay him the extra but just haven't got their acts together. It's not the best time to be job hunting so he might be best keeping calm and carrying on.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 15/12/2011 19:43

Well, his boss told him how much other people in the same role earn. It varies lot - apparently that's typical for his industry, which is a fairly new one - but the top limit is more than twice what he's on now. Sad

So it's not like he doesn't know, but he doesn't know and I don't know if it's really true tthey are the same jobs, or not, if that makes sense?

I can certainly see the argument for keeping calm and carrying on ... the worst thing would be if he lost his job!

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LRDtheFeministDragon · 15/12/2011 19:43

Btw thanks very much for the sympathy. Smile

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minciepie · 15/12/2011 19:47

Companies are often crap about getting their act together to make these decisions (often because it requires getting several senior and busy people to sit down together). So the delay could just be disorganisation, it doesn't necessarily mean they plan to fob him off.

I think the important thing is that your DH lets them know he hasn't forgotten, is disappointed by the delay so far, and that the raise is very important to him (code for: I will look elsewhere if I don't get it).

LRDtheFeministDragon · 15/12/2011 19:59

That's reassuring, thanks minciepie.

He has let them know he's disappointed, but I'll suggest to him he could afford to make the point about the raise being important.

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catsareevil · 15/12/2011 20:00

Why doesnt he look for jobs elsewhere? Getting another job offer seems to be the most predictible way of being offered a raise.

squeakytoy · 15/12/2011 20:04

If I were him I would seriously be looking for a new job. It wouldnt do any harm to look, and it might spur his employers into paying him the going rate rather than taking the piss.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 15/12/2011 20:08

I will tell him that, thanks both.

I think the thing for him is, he's happy with them and a bit lazy! He's much more goodnatured than me about being messed around.

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TartyMcFalalalalalalalalarty · 15/12/2011 20:15

YANBU, and I could have written that myself. Don't get me wrong, I'm very grateful that we're both in work, but it pisses me off that at the moment he's doing 15+ hours a week of unpaid overtime since he was given a salaried promotion a few months back. Today he started at 7 and he's still there! Again, I'm being careful what I wish for here - he's in manufacturing closely linked to the construction industry and it's great that his company are so busy.

However, I think that his employers are using the current economic climate to take the piss hold employees to ransom. [grr]

freedom2011 · 15/12/2011 20:20

No YANBU. I feel annoyed when DH has clients trying to squeeze him into accepting less than industry agreed rates. It is hugely annoying when you see someone you love and respect being taken for a ride. Even more so when it affects your family finances.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 15/12/2011 20:22

tarty - oh, yes, sounds familiar. Sad

I know we're lucky in a way and 'be careful what you wish for' is good advice ... it's just human nature to hope for a bit more, isn't it?

I don't know if he is being taken for a ride - I dunno how much he's 'worth', if you know what I mean.

Like an idiot when he first came home in the summer saying about it all I was planning in my head what we'd do and it felt like one step closer to being able to afford a baby, so I am annoyed I got my hopes up.

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TartyMcFalalalalalalalalarty · 15/12/2011 20:28

It's shit when your financial circumstances dictate your family plans. Right, in the new year let's get these men to realise what their skills are worth!

LRDtheFeministDragon · 15/12/2011 20:33

Grin Sounds like a plan!

Btw, it's not like it's the only thing affecting the baby decision - just one of the more persuasive elements IMO!

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