To be upset my mother seems to be pushing me out of my brother's wedding?

[RainbowSheep]

DB is getting married soon. His wife to be has asked me to do her hair and make up on the day, she was planning on getting ready at my mothers house. My mother and I don't get on particularly well and she lives with my two step sisters. She sugessted one of the sisters do wife to be's make-up on the day as she doesn't think I will get parked (even though receptiomn is ther afterwards...) I said no it is fine I will do it. She then goes behind my back and tells WTB that step daughter will be doing it.... I'm really upset by this and feel I've been pushed out, aibu?

No.

Talk directly to the bride to be. Let her know that you will be doing it, never said you wouldn't and to disregard any arrangements your mother tries to make.

You need to work hard to keep good communication with your brother and his fiancee, so that your mother is powerless.

Agree with Hecate. It's between you and the bride - talk directly to her.

YANBU at all. Make sure your future SiL knows you've never said you wouldn't do it and you'd still be happy to.

Just be careful about putting your FSiL in an awkward place with her new MiL, weddings are so stressful for the bride that even if it's not your fault at all your relationship with her could end up being tainted by a pre-wedding ishoo.

what Hecate said
can you do her hair/make up at her house before she goes to your mum's?

Why havent you phoned your mother and called her a bitch, I would.

What Hectate said.

BTB will want the best person to do her makeup. So you need to speak to her and ensure she is happy to have you do it.

Bad makeup could ruin her day.

I am a trained make up artist but I think it was more about the bonding really, don't know why my mum is being such a dick about it

have you spoken to your DB or his fiance about it? It's not up to your mum to decide.

I'm not entirely sure how that sort of call is going to improve the situation Fabby.

The important thing, surely, is to ensure the bride has a stress-free and lovely day? She doesn't need to get caught up in a family feud but equally, she should choose who does her make-up.

Yanbu

your mum is a cow

Yanbu to feel like you do.

Does the bride know about your relationship with your mum? If not you or your brother should fill her in so she understands that your mum is acting maliciously because of the history of your relationship with her. The bride can then decide how to work round the fact that your mum doesn't want you helping on the day.

I think you need to prepare yourself for the possibility that the bride "sides with your mum" for the sake of her future relationship with your mum.

So sorry. :(

Could you mention it to your brother rather than the bride? Would that be easier?

Phone them up and explain what is going on and that you will still be doing it.

I've asked my brother what he thinks, waiting for him to get back to me, I think my mother has put everyone in a really awkward situation

Ring bride to be and tell her you have it in your dirary to do the make up and she should ignore mother. then explain to mother that it's all in your diary and not to worry about making any changes.

Ring your mother and ask demand why she is causing trouble.