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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

The annual ritual

9 replies

startail · 14/12/2011 15:11

Why am I wrapping presents for aunts, uncles and cousins kids I never see. When I've still got to buy presents for the DCs of very dear friends I do?

OP posts:
Sirzy · 14/12/2011 15:12

If you never see them don't buy for them! Easy!

DoesNotGiveAFig · 14/12/2011 15:13

Send em a card and voucher instead if you feel you must give them something. Or see them more often?

HoHoOpotomus · 14/12/2011 15:13

yes why are you?

aldiwhore · 14/12/2011 15:14

Sounds like you've got into a rut of a tradition there. We buy for close family only, and if they have children, just the children. I think apart from DH and my own children I've had 6 gifts to buy.

I DO have a smallish family though, but when I had children I suggested that we stop the stress. So for example, I'll buy for either my sister or her cat/child. But not both. In return she buys me nowt, but does get the children a small gifts, we agree on a total cost and stick to it. My nephew-in-law now gets nothing as he's 18 (and I wouldn't know him if I fell over him).

CMOTdibbler · 14/12/2011 15:16

Don't do it then - if you never see them, it seems OTT.

LikeAnAdventCandleButNotQuite · 14/12/2011 15:18

Oooh, definetly speak to your family about a 'kis only' rule and their 18th christmas being the final one. Otherwise it ends up ridiculous! Cinema vouchers work perfectly for anyone over the age of 12, and £10 would get them a ticket to a film and a snack, so in theory a lot for your money.

Time to stand firm, I think.

PreviouslyonLost · 14/12/2011 15:19

Sympathy Startail...it's one of those strange dichotomies of Christmas life, we expend far too much energy on those that are LESS deserving. I too am guilty of this.

Hope a Psychologist will be along later to explain why...

I cling onto the fact that as I'm aware of it, I attempt to compensate by disregarding the dross in my life and concentrate on the people I truly care about as far as my insecurities allow.

Good luck.

Original poster
startail · 15/12/2011 13:48

I think it's that I'd some how be letting my Mum down if I didn't bother.
It's her brothers family and she has tried over the years to stop them sending stuff.
Also I feel guilty because part of the problem is they send totally inappropriate junk. You shouldn't give to receive and all that.

OP posts:
Original poster
startail · 15/12/2011 13:51

Kids only doesn't work because of childless and elderly people who I WANT to buy gifts for.

OP posts:
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