To cancel a play date for DS5 when other boy was diagnosed with tonsilitis yesterday

[bigeyes]

...he was given antibiotics but went to school today

I am 30weeks pregnant

yanbu!! Tonsilitis is hideous and highly infectious.

Is the bacterial kind as infectious as the viral one?

'Tia not infectious unless they kiss.

Fine to be back at school now he's on anti-b's.

We had a bacterial case which spread throughout the family but I'm not sure if viral is different.

Thanks genuinely don't know if I am bu. Fallen out with friend too

I've read tonsilitis is caused but many different things as I am pregnant was I wise to be cautious re possible group b strep.?

Sorry should have put that in op

Yanbu I would have done same in your position

winney dont know his mum never said

winney dont know his mum never said

Surely if he's on antibiotics it's bacterial anyway. If one of my children has ever had any infection or illness (or me) I cancel any meet ups - it's the polite thing to do imo. If your friend is being mean about it that's her problem.

Thanks its a nasty thing to have/catch

Gp B streptococcus doesn't cause tonsllitis, it is a bacteria that lives harmlessley in the genital tract of many women - you can't catch it or avoid getting it, just ensure treatment if there are risk factors ie waters breaking more than 24 hours before delivery, mum having a fever in labour. Bacterial tonsillitis is caused by group A streptococcus usually, a totally different bug which just happens to look slightly similar under a microscope hence both being called streptococci
Viral tonsillitis is pretty infectious as it's caused by cold viruses, bacterial tonsillitis less so and even less so if already treated, either way, getting tonsillitis (bacterial or viral) is not going to affect your pregnancy in any way apart from feeling grotty for a few days.
However, if the kid has tonsillitis surely they will be feeling ill and not want to come to a playdate anyway. If they are well enough to be at school and going on playdates they probably don't have tonsillitis anyway!

DC1 had tonsilitis (bacterial) probaby about once a month for 3 years (until they were removed) No one else in the famly ever caught it despite lots of kisses and cuddles (even when I was preg with DC2).

I agree with above post - my DD has a frequent tonsillitis - it is difficult to distinguish whether it is viral or bacterial but either way, it is a horrible illness.usually in the throws of it they have a temperature. I suspect if the child is at school then he probably does not have it - sounds like they prescribed antibiotics to be on the safe side , or - the GP told the parent only to use the prescription if the condition worsened but the parent didn't wait !
Yanbu to cancel the play date though. Life is too stressful - last thing you need when pg near Christmas is a poorly child. Friend should understand that .

dd's best friend has been having it on and off for months, she's been booked to have hem out it's so bad.

She hasn't infected dd or the rest of us yet!

I used to get it loads too, had no choice but to go to school when it was week on week off all winter every winter from ages 7 to 17

Thanks for info sally seems I've got that wrong n completely mixed up re strep infections.

So it seems it's whether it is bacterial or viral.

It's all gone very wrong anyway as I have cancelled play date and friend has said she is upset and offended and things have been said now, bit of a mess really.
D

Yeah, that's what I meant: if the kid is on ABs, it must be bacterial and it seems to me it's much harder to catch it than the viral one.

Perhaps you can explain to your friend that you're pg and a bit paranoid about catching bugs and that you didn't realise that it was bacterial.

If its any help DC continued nursery as usual whilst on antibiotics for his bacterial tonsilitis and they never aked me to exclude him and no one else ever caught it from him (and you really are looking at once a month frequency here).

I did used to tell everyone that DC had tonsilitis (bacterial not viral)( and then leave it up to them if they stlil wanted to socialise and we have never been refused and as far as I know none of my friends children has ever caught it frm him.

Yes winney this is my understanding as have read more now...

But too much said now to explai n but thanks for suggestion, in fact I did verbally and in a txt.

When I rung to cancel she put the phone down, this is what made me think AIBU. Would add that I had recurring tonsilitis for two years as adult and know how awful it can be I just used to take antibiotics off work for a week it calmed down in the end but I was offered to have them out.

Anyway friend got quite personal with insults in texts since starting thread so in her eyes I've been very unreasonable indeed.

So in view that a few have posted re their own dc's not infecting others the risk was minimal was I being unreasonable?

YANBU at all.

YANBU.

That sounds awful. Why did it get so heated? Hope you're OK.

You were being senisble in wanting to protect yourself, your child and your unborn baby from nasties (whether or not your fears are based on clinical accuracy is neither here nor there - at the time of the converstaion you were concerned there may be a risk) so imo your friend sems to be behaving quite unreasonably - to say 'oh, there's a shame, little jimmy was so looking forward to it and I'm sure you won't catch anything' is one thing but personal insults are somewhat uncalled for here!

Thanks you know when you think you've done the right thing but because of her response it made me question my judgement.

So maybe she doesn't like being disagreed with

I think it's a poor show when insults are used to back up stance that are unconnected to issue. I did say it doesn't matter who was right or wrong that we both need to do what is right by our own child and if this differs then so be it.

The playmate was to be at a venue so no food or time was wasted.

Any other thoughts from daytime Mnetters?

Not enough detail here. Your friend seems to have over reacted hugely. But what are the other issues? Have you exposed her kids to illness in the past? Is she having a hard time and desperate to see you? I don't think YABU but I don't think you are telling the,whole story either.