In being annoyed with people who buy a gift for me

[laptopdancer]

and dh when we have expressely asked that they dont.

TBh Im sure he wasnt offended

if you feel so strong about this, give the presents back, unopened. Surely the message will be received loud and clear. Do you have the courage to do so?

No don't write him a cheque! Its already clear that he doesn't want to be obligated to you financially.

Just suggest next year that you both stick to a presnt under a fiver as xmas is an expensive time of year. But suggest it and only do it if he seems keen.

I can remember in the past buying xmas presents I really couldn't afford for people much better off than me. But I would have felt patronised and tbh humiliated to be told not to buy presents or only a token, if they weren't also going to do the same.

It may sound mad if you have never been in this situation yourself, but people's feelings around money are often complex.

Personally I think that would be really rude!

"give the presents back, unopened" :o

What on earth are you on about?Obligated financially? He is our child, he lives with us.

Oops, was meant to be a not a

Anyway, that is just one example...as mentioned its the deal breakers who are the worst! I always keep a bottle of plonk handy just in case

Sorry I didn't realise he was your child. I thought he was a relative in the extended family. Okay that is different then. Parents usually spend more on their dcs when they are young adults than dcs spend on parents.

I honestly think he was kind, I guess I just worried and wanted him to keep the moey for himself. I have said thankyou graciously.

You sound too nice. And he sounds too nice.

You make a right pair don't you?!

He might accidently get it back in a card [fgrin}