Ball skills

[Mishy1234]

This may be one of the most boring AIBU threads ever, but it's a source of heated discussion in our house atm, so I thought I would canvass the opinions of Mumsnetters.

We are not a sporty family and DH is not a lover of football, so it's never something which is watched/talked about in the house. Because of this, he never kicks a ball about with DS1 (3.5).

I think it's important that DS learns to handle a ball BEFORE he goes to school, as it's an important part of playground life. DH says there's plenty of time for him to learn once he's actually at school and learning rugby etc.

I'm just suggesting to DH that it might be nice to have a kick around in the garden, not anything over the top. He's dead against it as it's something he doesn't enjoy.

What do you think?

(Disclaimer- yes, I know I can do it myself and plan to, but I do think it would be nice for DH to take part too).

Hang on, your 3yo has never ever kicked a ball around? - how has he managed that!

YANBU, though, DH and I both kick balls around with our toddler DD though neither of us like football. She loves it and it's good exercise.

i think your dh is unreasonable, but equally just get on and do it yourself and when he sees the two of you having fun maybe he will join in.

my dp was not into football but a football mad ds2 has changed that! interestingly ds1 always hated football/ball games and from a very young age ie 18mths if you tried to play with a ball with him he would just pick it up and throw it away into a bush etc, even now at 12yrs he only plays ball games at PE and occasionally at the park when they younger ones are playing he would just REFUSE point black as a young toddler/child to kick a ball etc. ds2 on the otherhand the total opposite!

Not really, unless he's done it at nursery. It's not something he's done with us.

He loves things like gardening and this is what he's usually doing at nursery when I collect him. When we are at home he cooks/bakes with me, draws, plays with Lego etc When we are out he's mostly on his bike.

He does Tumble Tots which does have a throwing and catching element to it, but he's just not really interested in playing with a ball.

Ah I see, well if he's not interested I wouldn't push it. In the first few years of primary football isn't really the dominant thing to do at play time, and by the time it is he will have had years to learn (or make friends with other people who aren't interested either if he still doesn't like it)

It's not compulsory to like football at school. DS hates it and he has plenty of friends. It's never been an issue to him that he can't kick a ball to save his life!

Not all boys like football and your son will find his own place at school.

However, from a fun and fitness perspective, I don't see how you can get to 3.5yrs without finding yourself, a ball and your parents in the garden/park!

That's good to know FolkGirl. My main concern is to send him to school properly equipped to deal with playground life. I don't want him on the back foot before he's even started.

We do a lot outside, it just doesn't involve a ball (or very many play parks). He usually does at least 3 miles a day on his bike, down to the beach and back. Swims twice a week. Tumble Tots once a week. Gardening at least 5 times a week. Walks around the Botanic gardens (twice a week in the winter, more in the summer) etc.

You can have fun and keep fit without a ball you know!

I worried about that too Mishy. When he was in reception, he attended a term of after school football skills. He cried every week because he didn't want to go. . Don't make the same mistake!

I don't think he's ever kicked a ball around of his own volition!

FolkGirl - I was thinking about one of the football/rugby type classes too, but I know he would really hate it. I don't want to force him into something he doesn't like, but at the same time I want him to be prepared and football does seem to be a big social thing at school.

Your advice has been really helpful and I think I'll just encourage him a bit more at home.

Oh. I opened this thinking it was going to be much more racy

Umm, back in the dark ages when I taught we did something with balls which was good. I can't remember all of it but it wasn't just kicking. There was "around the world", passing the ball over the neck, under arms, through legs, waist etc and "on the move", bouncing it. Maybe a google of basketball / netball skills might be useful.

IME ball skills don't really come into play until KS2 / Junior school. Expect to lose many jerseys which have been used for goalposts.

Believe me, not all boys love football. There are plenty of boys at DD's school who don't play it constantly at break and lunch.
He will be just as popular if he is a friendly and sociable person.

It seems to me that kicking a ball is the norm round where I live. There are countless football teams for kids & both my DD's play for the local youth teams. DS is nearly 4 & has a heck of a left kick on him. Then again DH is a football mad geek so its no wonder I have 2 girls playing.

Onceyour DS goes to school he'll make friends & inevitably will kick a ball. Maybe take him to the park/school yard/local astroturf for a kickabout. Balls are cheap to buy. Will Santa bring him one??

Plenty of boys don't play or like football. I have two who do like playing football, watching football, discussing football statistics (great for their maths). Fortunately, I like it too. It's not something we've pushed - DH not a keen sportsman. Just let him be. He'll either take to it or not.

MY DS was not a football player, his "language" of the play ground was pokemon and yugioh cards. He is 16 now and his sports of choice are swimming, kayaking and climbing.

My DSs (early schoolies) don't play with balls in the playground. That only starts KS1 - in the football playground. Balls flying around unsteady four year olds would be school carnage. They do some ball skills in PE - but that's about it. I'd look at the wider picture of being active and getting out doors (e.g. Throwing bread for ducks).

If you want to then you do it. Simple as that

And people ask why I'm utterly delighted to have two DDs?
There is nothing DH would find more soul destroyingly boring than " kicking a ball around".

Loads more replies, thanks!

I'll definitely be following your advice and will chill out about it. I will buy a football though (we only have one of those light foam ones atm) so there's one around and I suspect his younger brother may enjoy that type of thing more.

Thanks for all the advice, it's much appreciated.

startail - your DH sounds like mine! Saying that though, I know he did play a lot of sport at school, so it's not as if he hasn't done it.

Mishy - you can get smaller ones in places like DW Sports for about £5. Good quality too x

My DS couldn't kick a ball at that age.

When he went to football coaching when he was 5 he used to dance instead of paying attention to the ball.

His first game in a team, they were beaten 14 - 0 and he came off and asked "Did we win, Mummy?" I of course said yes.

He's now 15 and plays in a team that is top in the league, he just seemed to get it at about age 8.

(Disclaimer, DH was a footballer and coached DS team till he was 10, so there is no way he wasn't going to learn how to play...)

It has been great though, except the washing, standing in freezing cold supporting, driving to training twice per week, having to have 3 pairs of wearable, size fitting boots, having the team round constantly, having to pay for sodding Sky Sports and a season ticket to our local crap pro team.............

I'd give it serious thought OP, stamp collecting sounds like fun.....

Katie you forget the driving round the countryside at 70mph in a convoy with parents that don't indicate.

DS1 (12) is quite shy and football has helped him to make friends and get a feeling of belonging.