To think this is now rude?

[Multigrain]

Having a birthday party next weekend, due to the type of party I had to book tickets in advance.

Parents/Children were given invites at beginning of November. Within 2 days of the invites going out everyone replied saying yes.

Sent out a reminder a couple of days ago with precise details. Now two mothers are saying they want to come with their child, the venue is sold out. So not possible, they have contacted me numerous times in last couple of days to ask what they can do.

I have said send the child as originally planned, or not attend the party, unfortunately no other option available.

But they are getting arsey, all other parents are perfectly happy, have responded with 'thanks for details x is looking forward to it see you next week.'

AIBU for thinking these 2 mothers are now being rude, and to send a text to them saying "Due to the cause for concern this party is causing you, I recommend you don't send x to the party, and I will count him out. There will be other parties, and we'll see you at those"?

you all sound pretty arsey tbh

No, don't send them a text like that. You may regret it. Just stick to what you said. Don't blame you for being pissed off, though,

What sort of venue is it?

Don't most public venues have reception/waiting areas?

Whatever happened to having a few kids around for fish paste sarnies, a jump up and down to the 'Hokey Cokey' and huge slab of artificially coloured tantrum fuel (aka Birthday Cake)?

You just say that it is sold out, so they cant come with their child, and if that causes a problem then you will understand, but there isnt anything else you can do about it.

YABU to conduct your business by text. And you are being as arsey as them. All sounds rather grim tbh.

I think they are being a bit last minute but I know how easy it is for these things to get overlooked until a few days before. I suppose it depends on how old the children are. If they are only little then I tihnki it was a bit silly of you booking places for children only without making that really clear to the parents. I'm sorry but you do sound a bit strssed and arsy.

Have you sent the text yet?
What's the venue?

I dont understand. The mothers who want to come, they got the original invitations, and rsvpd yes? Why can they now not come? Do they want to join and stay at the party, or do they want you to include a sibling? Sorry, I dont get it.

If it is something like a Panto then I can see why it is pissing you off. These things have to be booked in advance and they must know that. Do they think that you have a special deal with the box office where they will fit extra seats just for your party?!

I can't understand why you can't just ring them and say "I'm sorry, it's completely sold out, there are absolutely no more tickets available" and be nice about it?

Sorry I probably am becoming arsey I wasn't to begin with I am now.

Original invitiation said To Child you are invited to watch show for x's birthday. With this I said to parents you are welcome to come but tickets are £20 per adult and I need to know at time of RSVPing if you would like to come as I'm sure you appreciate tickets will sell out fast.

These two particular mothers both separately phoned me last week in November (3 weeks after RSVPing) and asked if they could still get adult tickets. I said yes because I have to confirm definite numbers on 1/12. They both responded along the lines of "if i decide to come I'll let you know before then, if you don't hear from me, x will be coming alone".

I said no problem just need to know by 1/12.

Didn't hear anymore until sent out confirmation details of where to meet etc. These mums both text me, and said 'could they now come?' I responded via text I would have to see as I believe tickets are sold out, but I would ask and would let them know.

I phoned the venue, they said tickets are sold out, but if they get any returns Mon/Tues of next week they will let me know. I phoned both parents to tell them this. They both said well what can I do, and I said either wait to confirm with me mon/tues if they want to send child alone if no ticket becomes available, or send child alone, or not send child, and I fully understand.

They both said they would wait until next week to confirm. This was yesterday.

Today I've had 12 texts and 3 voice mails from these parents asking me what can they do if they can't come.

I've reiterated the 3 options each time to the text.

They do sound pretty ditsy, if you've communicated as clearly as you say. There's always some people in a group who need more spoonfeeding than the rest combined. I'd just sigh privately and nicely reiterate everything again, as Rooble says.

Stop replying, they obviously have forgotten how to read the word "No"!

6 adults 15 kids.

Which was the number stated at the very beginning, as no parents are going, this is my dh and I, and my dc god parents.

Kids 6 and 7 yo.

YANBU.
They are.
Especially if they decide not to let their children come - You will also have wasted 2 childrens' tickets!

Just tell the parents they can wait outside if they like but won't be able to come into the show... if its in a theatre, there will be a bar!

Just text back and say that "I am sorry, there is nothing I can do, I told you I needed to know final numbers by the 1st, and you told me you were not coming if you had not let me know by then. Please let me know if your dd will still be attending the event".

And leave it at that.

They are seriously dim and rude.

I agree with Quint. And add that the venue sells the tickets and you have no control over it, it isn't your fault that they have all been sold already, you aren't doing this to them! The tickets have simply been sold. the venue has a certain number of tickets available and they're all gone! It's not within your control.

They're acting like you're doing this to them!

bloody idiots