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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

AIBU to think if the ex wants something for the kids at his house, the he should pay for it?

20 replies

workshy · 07/12/2011 22:34

DD 8 sleeps on an air bed when she is at his and it's broken

he wants me to pay to replace it

AIBU to tell him to bugger off?

OP posts:

Maryz · 07/12/2011 22:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pictish · 07/12/2011 22:39

Hell no!

WTF to even think it. What a loser.

MissPricklePants · 07/12/2011 22:40

yanbu!ex should provide it!

slavetofilofax · 07/12/2011 22:41

Bugger off seems quite tame in the circumstances. Unless he gives you a very hefty maintenance payment on time every month.

ChippingInNeedsSleep · 07/12/2011 22:41

Pray tell - why does he think you should buy it?

Utter knob.

IneedAChristmasNickname · 07/12/2011 22:43

YANBU. When (once again) DP and I were separated I provided pjs, toothbruses etc for his house. Only because I realised he wasn't going to. A bed though? I wouldn't have been able to afford that!

Bogeyface · 07/12/2011 22:44

Would this be out of the millions of £££ of maintenance he pays you and therefore he shouldnt have to pay for a single thing for his DD? Despite the fact that it is adjusted to take into account time spent at the NRP's place.

Tell him to jog on. Or as MaryZ said, get her a ready bed that stays at home.

Original poster

workshy · 07/12/2011 22:47

because he has offered to pay for half of swimming lessons

we are in an on going maintainance battle so generally he pays me nothing

he can afford the airbed -it's £7 ffs but I'm not buying it out of principle

he has a double bed and a single but because they don't share a room at mine he doesn't make them share at his so DD1 gets the single, he gets the double and DD2 gets the airbed on his bedroom floor!

if it was me I would make the kids share the double but his house, his rules!

and yes he is an utter knob

OP posts:

blackeyedsanta · 07/12/2011 22:47

stuff that. he can't even provide for the basics? how pathetic!

pictish · 07/12/2011 22:51

He should meet you halfway on activities like swimming!!

However...his house, his problem.

Bogeyface · 07/12/2011 22:51

What a wank stain!

CumpyGruntWithJinglyBellsOn · 07/12/2011 22:54

I think 'Bugger off' would be quite restrained in the circumstances.

olgaga · 07/12/2011 22:55

If he can't provide her with a bed, she shouldn't be staying there overnight. I'd tell him that, and if he doesn't like it, he can go to court.

Which will cost him a lot more than a bloody bed.

pictish · 07/12/2011 22:59

Has he actually paid half for the swimming lessons or did he just offer to?

Not relevant - just wondered.

pictish · 07/12/2011 23:01

Why doesn't he just do what a parent should, and buy another single bloody bed for his child?

pictish · 07/12/2011 23:02

Cheap but decent second hand beds are readily available. I have bought three...for each of my kids.

Original poster

workshy · 07/12/2011 23:04

beacuse he is a tosser who works full time but lives rent free at his parent's and constantly pleads poverty!

swimming lessons is to be paid for on saturday, he says he will drop money round before then -if he doesn't they won't be going to swimming lessons!

OP posts:

Bogeyface · 07/12/2011 23:09

I might have had some sympathy if he was struggling to make ends meet (not much you understand, but a bit!), but living bill and rent free and earning FT?!

No effing way!

Are you in touch with his parents? Could you talk to them about it?

pictish · 07/12/2011 23:13

Oh now! He is just playing silly buggers isn't he? Petty petty man.

Say no. Ignore him. Do not be drawn into a confrontation over this as that is exactly what he wants...to piss you off.

Original poster

workshy · 07/12/2011 23:13

I'm in touch but they take a 'it's nothing to do with us' stance to everything

which I can understand as I know how difficult he is to live with!

OP posts:

Flip