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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to not send any Christmas cards this year

20 replies

KittyFane · 07/12/2011 20:33

I have a long list: family, friends from lots of different times in my life, people I work with and have worked with etc.
The thing is, I don't think I am on anyone's list apart from family. I get cards back but I think it's a matter of 'oh s*, got a card from Kitty, better send her one'.
AIBU to just not send any and see what happens?

OP posts:

Tryharder · 07/12/2011 20:35

I didn't send any last year. Just had loads on and didnt get round to it.

It does look a bit bad though. I did send apologetic emails after Xmas though. I wouldn't think you were being unreasonable if you didnt send any though. Up to you though!

EuphemiaInExcelsis · 07/12/2011 20:37

YANBU. I used to be a mug and send them to all my family and a bunch of people on DH's side I'd never even met.

I stopped a couple of years ago - I now only send to immediate family and friends; the sky has not fallen in.

belledechocchipcookie · 07/12/2011 20:38

I'd do an email, tell them you're thinking of them all and have decided to make a donation to charity instead of sending out cards this year. They end up in the recycle bin after christmas anyway.

Bonkerz · 07/12/2011 20:38

For the first year I am actually considering NOT sending cards. I think it all gets silly.

thepeoplesprincess · 07/12/2011 20:39

Nah, YANBU. Paper communications are so last millenium. Just tag the peeps you're actually bothered about wishing Merry Xmas in a FB message.

yellowraincoat · 07/12/2011 20:39

I never understand why my mother persists in doing this. I might send a couple of cards to the old dears in the town where I grew up, but most of the people I care about, I'll see in person to wish them a happy Christmas anyway or I'll call them.

Stuff sitting down for 4 hours or whatever scribbling out stuff to people I never see.

FairToMiddlin · 07/12/2011 20:39

I didn't send any for the first time last year so I am waiting to see what happens this year.

I see most of my family & friends at some point over Christmas so it seems a bit daft sending cards.

I am mainly feeling a bit guilty about not sending to neighbours who are retired and might not get many cards so I'm not sure whether I might make exceptions there.

zukiecat · 07/12/2011 20:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

KittyFane · 07/12/2011 20:42

I think I will do the same Euph. Family and close friends.
I do feel a bit of a misery not sending them as I always have but I don't think people will be bothered.
I think I get cards back when I send them but wouldn't get them otherwise!

OP posts:

FairToMiddlin · 07/12/2011 20:45

I don't like to receive them.

They annoy me.

They litter up the place.

(I do like Christmas though)

redwineformethanks · 07/12/2011 20:46

I think it's fine not to send cards so long as you won't be upset if you don't get any in return. In the past, perhaps you were just more organised than your friends. I wouldn't assume they only sent you a card out of guilt.

DialMforMummy · 07/12/2011 20:47

YANBU. i never understood this tradition. I'd send a card to people I don't see but not to people I can say "Merry Christmas" face to face to.

dogindisguise · 07/12/2011 20:48

Do an email and say you're donating the money you would have spent on cards to charity. Or just say you're saving trees!
I'm tempted not to send any cards but I usually do send some.

TheFarSide · 07/12/2011 20:52

One year I didn't send any cards and I think most people didn't even notice (apart from one old-fashioned relative who sulked and didn't send us a card for the next couple of years). I now send them again because I have come to realise that for me it's an important way of maintaining contact with people. I wouldn't think badly of anyone who didn't send me one.

Original poster

KittyFane · 07/12/2011 20:53

redwine I wouldn't mind but I do love hearing from old/distant friends (once a year!) hmm, I don't know.

OP posts:

Original poster

KittyFane · 07/12/2011 20:56

thefarside yes, I think it's good to keep contact and I've always sent cards at Christmas, I could e-mail everyone or poke them on FB.
I think I'll do the e-mail!

OP posts:

MosEisley · 07/12/2011 21:02

Well I have always thought Christmas cards were a bit unnecessary. I find it bordering ridiculous that the children at DC2 & 3's nursery all send cards to each other.

However, they all do it, and I receive lots of cards, and over time I have just accepted that it is easier to submit to the card writing early, do it efficiently, and get it over with.

I think (hope) my relatives and friends round the country appreciate it.

I have no qualms about striking someone off the list if they never send one to us, though! Says to me that they aren't that bothered about keeping in touch. A Christmas-time greeting - card or email or FB poke or whatever, is the lowest common denominator of communication, surely?

upahill · 07/12/2011 21:06

It's up to you but I love sending and recieving cards.
Even the ones from the bank and our insurance bloke!!

BleurghUna · 07/12/2011 21:27

People you see a lot = no point
People you never see = no point
Basically just send them to people you see occasionally and want to keep in touch with, particularly if they are elderly.

pebbledasher · 07/12/2011 21:28

I only send 2 cards and that's to elderly relatives who would really notice if I didn't. Apart from that I've not sent cards for years and the number received has not diminished. None of my friends seem to notice/care about the lack of cards from me.

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