I know I am, just need a gentle slap

[lljkk]

Briefly:
last week I couldn't pick her up myself, and 10yo DD refused to attend Brownies carol service because I wouldn't let her walk home by herself (8pm, dark lonely roads, 3/4 mile).
This week she kept nagging about when could we decorate the tree & I kept saying "Thursday, and when certain jobs are done"; this afternoon (Wednesday) DD & DS2 fighting like ferrets in a bag, DH away again so a bit awkward getting DD to Brownies.

"Certain" jobs got done & DD clamouring to decorate tree, in her PJs by 5pm, so I just let her get on with it & she has missed the Brownies Xmas party at local popular soft play centre (which I told her about today, too). But I haven't reminded her that she's missing it...

Thing is, Brown Owl is desperate keen for some of her older Brownies (like DD) to move onto Guides, and DD is cheesing me off with lack of commitment to Brownies, nagging, backchat & constant fighting with DS2 (they are getting on like sweetness & light now, of course). So I could just quietly let DD drop out of Brownies. Just Email Brown Owl to let her know DD not coming back. And if DD wants to go back she'd have to go back to Guides or nothing.

See, I'm horrible, aren't I?

I'll go and read OP now

If she is 10, she should already be in Guides.

Ask Brown Owl about her moving up at the start of next term, and then have a flying up ceremony at the first Brownie meeting in January.

I am a Brownie Guider and it is very normal for 9.5+ year olds to have outgrown Brownies. I'd be more worried if they were still keen to attend, tbh.

Kids. Who would have them?!!!!

I didn't think they usually went up to Guides until after 10th birthday? DD's old Sixer stayed in Brownies until 2 weeks before her 11th birthday!

Must admit that I'm nervous about DD picking up even more attitude by mixing with older girls.

Wibble. I move heaven & Earth to get DC to activities & feel mightily cheesed off when they don't appreciate it. The other irony is that DC are having a merry blast now, happily decorating tree & house.

My dd has missed the Brownie carol service today because she didn't want to go without me and it was being held 6-7pm. I have a toddler and other children and my DH is away. Didn't fancy dragging them all out at tea time for an hour tbh. If she had agreed to go alone I would have asked another mum to drop off with her own child but as it is she didn't go. It's not a problem really in the grand scheme of things I reckon.

The go up to Guides the first term after their 10th birthday.

Well, not in DD's Guide hut, I guess, Merryscot. But DD's Brownie pack has 26 so they need to shed a few...
Don't know what to about DD & Brownies/Guides. Give her a slap around the head, maybe.

Oh well, at least we'll all be in bed early tonite.

Does she have to do Guides?

It's only basic courtesy to let Brown Owl know for certain, or the Guides leader, and I'd like to be able to plan my Wednesday nights in future.

I guess I should have dragged her along kicking & crying last week & this one, but I don't have the energy for it, especially when DH away & other DC to juggle. I don't want to pay out subs unless she goes reliably, and we are ending this term soon so big question is what will she do from January?? I have made her pay for missed sessions in past when she got stroppy & wouldn't go, maybe I should go back to that; I could let go a little better, then.

I don't think you can de-Brownify her without talking to her about it

And you might find that being bottom of the heap, young and uncool in the eyes of the older girls, takes her down a peg or two rather than giving her any delusions of grandeur

Talk to her

Sometimes my two don't want to go to brownies / guides if there's something more exciting on offer even though they love it in general