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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

TO think that this money demand from dd's ballet school is really insensitively timed?

32 replies

soandsosmummy · 05/12/2011 17:49

DD came home from ballet on Saturday with a note I've just got round to reading. Basically she's taking one of her ballet exams in March and they have asked for the exam fees plus fees for 8 extra lessons (compulsory for anyone taking the exam). It totals £85 to be paid on December 17th.

DP and I will cope we have it in savings and can budget paying it back in to January and February but AIBU to think that for some families this amount of money would be hard to find at 2 weeks notice at the best of times let alone the weekend before Christmas?

OP posts:
MrSpoc · 05/12/2011 17:50

YANBU - Why do you have to pay for the extra classes?

SummerRain · 05/12/2011 17:51

YANBU.

I have to pay 146 euros this week for swimming lessons. They start in January, why it can't be paid in Jan is beyond me as surely common sense would tell them that a couple of weeks before xmas is not a good time to be asking for money from families with children.

belgo · 05/12/2011 17:52

YABU. The money has to be paid. Most extra curricular activities are expensive.

sue52 · 05/12/2011 17:53

DD's ballet school charges extra for exam tuition but you pay by the lesson. That's a lot to pay up front.

gettingalifenow · 05/12/2011 17:53

Of course she has to pay for the extra lessons mrspoc - why should the ballet school put them on for free?

But that's not the OP's point. Can you ask for it to be paid after Christmas? Its probably because the exam entry forms have to be in at that time and with it the entry money - so maybe pay some now and some after Christmas. Some of the cost will be for room hire for the classes so probably wont have to be paid by the school until next term. You can always ask.

And i'm sure its optional - your DD could take the exam later - next time around.

belgo · 05/12/2011 17:54

TBH isn't it better to have warning to pay it before Christmas? Aren't people more skint after Christmas?

slavetofilofax · 05/12/2011 17:54

I wouldn't be annoyed at the timing of the payment, life as it happens normally doesn't just stop because it's Christmas.

But I would be annoyed that I had to pay for extra lessons for the exam. What are they doing in the regualr lessons if they aren't preparing for the exam? Confused

diddl · 05/12/2011 17:55

Perhaps they ask before Christmas to make sure that they get the money?

When do the extra lessons start?

What would happen if it wasn´t paid until then?

Original poster
soandsosmummy · 05/12/2011 17:55

Its not paying I'm complaining about, its the insensitivity of asking for that amount of money a week before Christmas

OP posts:
belgo · 05/12/2011 17:56

It's still three weeks till Christmas; not one week.

belgo · 05/12/2011 17:57

Do you find gas /electricity/water bills also insensitive three weeks before Christmas?

Original poster
soandsosmummy · 05/12/2011 17:57

Sigh - the 17th is a week before (well technically a week and a day)

OP posts:
diddl · 05/12/2011 17:58

If the money is needed now, why is it insensitive to ask for it now?

If the money isn´t needed until Feb, for example, then I would find asking´for it now odd.

diddl · 05/12/2011 18:00

Well according to me it´s 20 days until CD-best part of three weeks, I would say.

santastooearlymustdache · 05/12/2011 18:00

ballet is an expensive hobby, and i agree with belgo here

they are letting you know 3 weeks before christmas that the fees are due.

and agree with slavetothefilofax, it's a long time until march, why are they so sure the extra lessons are required already?

belgo · 05/12/2011 18:02

Actually if we are going to get really pedantic, if she came home with the letter on saturday, that is three weeks and one day before ChristmasGrin

Geordieminx · 05/12/2011 18:03

Have they demanded or have they asked?

There is a difference.

if the letter says "we demand that you pay this money by the 17th December" then YANBU

Original poster
soandsosmummy · 05/12/2011 18:05

Perhaps I've not explained myself (happy to accept I am being unreasonable but just for clarity) I am not upset about the cost for ourselves as we are in a postion to budget for that sort of thing but some familes are not.

The letter came home on 3rd December. It requested the payment on 17th December. Therefore families are being asked to find £85 with two weeks notice to be paid one week before Christmas.

I am probably being unreasonable Grin

OP posts:
slavetofilofax · 05/12/2011 18:07

I really can't see how it's insensitive. Do you expect them to not do anything extra in November, December and January?

diddl · 05/12/2011 18:08

I think it depends on if they really need the money then-in terms of when the extra lessons start & when expenses start for them-or if they just want it then.

belgo · 05/12/2011 18:10

If the exam is in March, then presumably the lessons, one extra a week, start in January? In which case they will need payment to reserve the studio/teacher etc.?

I assume they need the extra lessons to learn the specifics for the exam - I suppose not all children are interested in taken the exam so don't need to learn the specifics for it.

Floggingmolly · 05/12/2011 18:14

It's perfectly usual to have extra focused pre-exam classes, but ours are generally payable individually. If they are required in advance, the payment would be due at the date of the first lesson, not 3 weeks before.
Check with the ballet school if this is the case?

Laquitar · 05/12/2011 18:18

Not 'insensitive' imo. Just pain on the neck, like any other bill.

FabbyChic · 05/12/2011 18:20

If you can afford ballet lessons I guess its just something you know will crop up at some point, surely you were aware of how far along she was and that exams were imminent?

mercibucket · 05/12/2011 18:23

I run private classes and would have tried to extend the deadline to end dec/early jan so next months payceck was in but tbh that can be just as hard to budget for. Ballet can cost $$$ and is one reason why dd doesn't do it. Tbh I would assume most parents doing it could find the cash and knew it was coming but it does sound bad timing

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