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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To put my bloody plate back in its original place?

57 replies

DuffyHasABeard · 05/12/2011 15:22

MIL staying. Soup for lunch. I out some side plates for the bread. I obviously put them on the "wrong" side as she went round the table moving them all to the left. I'm right handed and LIKE my bread plate on the right. So I moved it back, cue a "look".

I wouldn't care if it was a big posh meal but it was a bowl of bloody soup and a bit of sliced bread and it's my bloody house, table and plate!

AIBU?

OP posts:
Original poster
DuffyHasABeard · 05/12/2011 18:53

So, SB and MLA, you'd happily go into somebody else's house and rearrange their table? How rude, what kind of message is that to give your children?

I know how to set a table. I also do not see the point in setting the table for a casual bowl of soup and a couple of slices of bread when I am already in a rush. As I said, a proper meal, then yes, but three times a day setting and unsetting the table is just daft. There's are more pressing things in my life than putting plates on the correct side and using the right cutlery.

OP posts:
Original poster
DuffyHasABeard · 05/12/2011 18:57

Oh dear, she's going to write me an email about what an uncouth soul I am and not fit for her son, isn't she? Confused

OP posts:
Frostyfoxy · 05/12/2011 18:58

What about if you eat left handed? My fil thinks it is rude of me to eat left handed and gets quite uppity about it......

SolidGoldVampireBat · 05/12/2011 18:58

I think laying tables is wierd (even though I am not judgemental about having sex with furniture as long as you wipe up afterwards).
We don't do this in our house, I just hand DS cutlery along with his dinner. And then he eats with his fingers anyway...

seeker · 05/12/2011 19:01

Why can't she have a bath after everyone's gone to bed?

Crosshair · 05/12/2011 19:01

:o It could be worse I wouldn't even think to use a side plate for some bread let alone that it should sit on the left. I just stick it on some kitchen roll.

Original poster
DuffyHasABeard · 05/12/2011 19:09

Seeker, because our walls are like paper, and there's no chance of getting to sleep while there's a bath being run.

OP posts:
SauvignonBlanche · 05/12/2011 19:14

Steady on OP, where has anyone suggested that there aren't more important things in life?
God, your MIL is brave!

Original poster
DuffyHasABeard · 05/12/2011 19:15

Did I forget to mention that it was actually a Cup-a-soup?

OP posts:
SnapesMistressofMerriment · 05/12/2011 19:21

My fil runs baths at 3am, be grateful for small mercies.

SauvignonBlanche · 05/12/2011 19:22

IABU by stealth!
How could you not mention that? Very relevant.

Firawla · 05/12/2011 19:31

OP Yanbu, its your house she shouldn't be rude to rearrange it.
Also there is not a "right" way to set the table imo because you get people claiming its "right" to pick up bread with your left hand or whatever else (also people that put their fork in their left hand to eat Confused ), its arrogant to say that is the right way because other cultures do it differently and some people find eating with the left disgusting so if people wish to do that then they can please themselves but should not claim it is "the right way" and definitely not rearrange other people's houses or plates

Sparkletastic · 05/12/2011 19:34

grabs desk microphone kill her....

Adversecamber · 05/12/2011 21:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

maybenow · 05/12/2011 21:33

YWBU to put the plate on the right in the first place

SWBU to move them

YWB even more U to move them back

[shakes head]

ViviPrudolf · 05/12/2011 21:45

Xmas Grin @ maybenow

PludolphTheRedNosedReindeer · 05/12/2011 21:50

Could you fox her by placing the plate under the soup bowl? That is the form in lots of restaurants and cafes.

If things are arranged in that way, you will then be free to re-position your plate as you see fit, and it would be even more monstrously rude of her to change your setting

Or tell her to sit down at the table before you serve, so she can't interfere! Wink Even more monstrously rude!

Original poster
DuffyHasABeard · 05/12/2011 22:39

So what's the etiquette with tablecloths then? I hate them - she keeps buying them - I never use them - she insists on one when she comes to stay. I do prefer a naked tabletop but that's bad form too?

(Re: the soup, have decided to start using croutons instead of bread)

OP posts:
Original poster
DuffyHasABeard · 05/12/2011 22:42

PS I didn't move MIL's or FIL's plate, only my own. They're perfectly entitled to eat southpawed if they choose.

OP posts:
Anniegetyourgun · 05/12/2011 23:02

But Duffy, you know it would only turn out to be the wrong sort of croutons.

CatPussRoastingByAnOpenFire · 05/12/2011 23:07

Oh! I was hoping that this was another 'booble pate' thread! Sad

PelvicFloorOfHighTensileTinsel · 05/12/2011 23:12

You serve cup-a-soup to guests?!? Shock

Soups · 06/12/2011 00:03

yanbu about table clothes, why make extra washing, instead of getting a cloth and wiping the table.

Pandemoniaa · 06/12/2011 00:31

Clearly I had forgotten it was Whinge About your Mother In Law Week.

But as crimes go, I'm surprised your MIL has not been buried under the patio. The bloody cheek of it, eh?

PludolphTheRedNosedReindeer · 06/12/2011 00:53

What about using some thermoweb to laminate all the ablecloths? Oilcoth is sooo practical and attractive, especially if it's Cath Kidston, darling!