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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have cried today-all too hard

32 replies

Sixyearoldwoes · 04/12/2011 18:14

Three was not the magic number today. I am too tired to want to do anything except state at a wall (blank) and am getting to the point where I want a break from dd2 but she's at the point where she wants me all the time. Dd1 is cheeky and testing boundaries and three year old ds thinks raspberries are the response of choice to all requests for him to do anything. One bout of sobbing on the stairs - is that okay or should I be looking to get my head sorted out? And a few rants before and after the sobbing!

OP posts:
juneau · 04/12/2011 18:18

How old is your youngest. Could it be PND? Sorry you're feeling so low. We all have days like that, so is this just a bad day or something more? If it's more than that you should make an appt with your doctor and go and have a chat.

JaneBirkin · 04/12/2011 18:18

You are doing great, pet.

I only have two and am going silently, and at times not so silently, insane at them.

You poor thing...have a Brew

CupOfGoodCheer · 04/12/2011 18:19

Oh OP, sorry to hear you've had a bad day. I think if its unusual for you to be having a shout/sobbing on the stairs then put it down to a shitty day.

If, however, its a regular occurrence, it might be worth thinking about getting some help - GP appointment maybe?

Is DP around? Do you have family or friends who can take the kids for a couple of hours to give you a break?

MissPentChristmasBudget · 04/12/2011 18:20

We all have moments where it gets on top of us, especially with three under (I'm assuming) 6yo. If you find yourself feeling like it's all hard work and no fun though, maybe you need to think about how things could be made easier. The occasional outburst is, I think, normal.

Have a Brew and keep talking about it on here if it helps Xmas Smile

gateacre1 · 04/12/2011 18:21

there are good days and there are bad days
some days I cry and try to remember to say to myself tomorrow will be better.
can you ask someone to look after the kids so you can have a break?

valiumredhead · 04/12/2011 18:22

Oh poor you - what a crap day. Have a Brew and some Thanks

You need a bath and an early night imo.

3 year olds blowing rude raspberries should be on the stairs -not you btw!

Original poster
Sixyearoldwoes · 04/12/2011 20:35

Bless you all! Dh did very sensibly take the older two out to the park this afternoon. I think the ranting is more than one off but I am doing all I can to keep a lid on it. Have seen gp and if anything she says Im stressed rather than depressed. Trouble is, sleep is my demon as far as being a nice mummy goes and we've had three weeks of illness. But I've sorted all the other stuff that is within my control-house tidy enough, washing under control, stuff ready for the day. I think I just have to put this day away and try for better tonorrow. I find (as name suggests) six year old the hardest and so weekends are worse. Dh is brilliant but ill and overworked. I just want a moment to smell the roses and remember that this is what i prayed for when we were struggling to conceive dd1. I feel i let my lovely dc down all the time. But Tuesday is coming and ds is at preschool so I'll catch up on sleep then. Have has a cuppa and a flake and about to have a nice bath. Thank you for listening! Smile

OP posts:
Original poster
Sixyearoldwoes · 04/12/2011 20:37

Btw dd2 is 5 months old-gorgeous bundle of non sleepingness!

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Hardgoing · 04/12/2011 22:47

Illness always tests me as a parent, I am always ranting if they are not better by about week 2 and by week 3 I feel like the worst mum on earth. Then they get better, sleep better, are better behaved again and it's like the light at the end of the tunnel (or at least vaguely manageable).

An occasion or two of shouting or crying is perfectly normal (to me, anyway), if it gets more frequent, you could ask the doc. Your Dh may also give you a frank assessment of your mental state, or at least mine does, he tells me when to rein it in a bit or try to get a bit more rest (e.g. by taking the children out) so talking with him might help.

Winter is hard with little ones.

FabbyChic · 04/12/2011 22:50

Try to make more time for the six year old, if he is playing up it will be because he feels he is not getting enough attention. Maybe keep him up an hour later than the others so he has Mummy time.

Original poster
Sixyearoldwoes · 04/12/2011 22:55

Fabby-this will make me sound really silly but I've been trying to think of ways to find time for dd1 and my addled brain didn't come up with that! I guess I'm so desperate for bedtime that I pack them both off together! But now ds is dropping his nap that might just work. Thanks Smile.

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redwineformethanks · 04/12/2011 22:55

Be kind to yourself. Let your standards slip a bit if that helps eg pizza is fine if you can't face cooking a delicious meal from scratch.

Original poster
Sixyearoldwoes · 04/12/2011 22:57

Dh very frank in my mental state-I know it's short term dodgy when he whisks the children off for the afternoon!. Hopefully we'll get a run of better health-cabin fever hasn't helped.

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Original poster
Sixyearoldwoes · 04/12/2011 23:05

Definitely, redwune. Now... How many times a week can they have pasta and pesto?Wink

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Greenshirt · 04/12/2011 23:07

13 yr old girl, 6 yr old boy and 2 yr old girl. Know where you're coming from.I believe I lost my mind about 8 months ago. Still looking for it.

redwineformethanks · 04/12/2011 23:07

six year old woes As often as necessary. My DH had it 3 times a week before he met me!

Original poster
Sixyearoldwoes · 04/12/2011 23:10

I guess if they start to turn green I've overdone it?

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Hardgoing · 04/12/2011 23:24

LOL at the turning green.

Original poster
Sixyearoldwoes · 04/12/2011 23:26

See...mumsnet can coax my sense of humour out if hiding-such as it is at this time of night Wink

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juneau · 05/12/2011 10:04

They've been ill for three weeks? God bless you! Really - I had a week of my two being ill last week - #1 with chicken pox and #2 with a cold and teething and it nearly drove me to distraction. Ill children is the absolute worst because they wake you at night, moan all day, want to be with you, on you, etc, don't go to school/nursery, so you end up feeling absolutely stifled. Hang in there - Tuesday is just around the corner Smile

Original poster
Sixyearoldwoes · 05/12/2011 14:54

Juneau-younger two each had a week each with one virus and then they each had a funny quick virus. Luckily dd1 was always catching things at their age so robustly healthy now! Dd2 still coughing like mad at night. Okay day today. I do wonder whether weekends worse because I'm keeping it in during the week...oh and dd1 out for six plus hours at school Wink. Marvellous thing education! Chicken pox is the pits-dd had it at three when ds was three months old and I'm still not sure how we got through.

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howlongwilltheynap · 05/12/2011 15:01

I find weekends worse too - I think because I am longing for it and breath a huge sigh of relief on Fri eve and I think it will be all easy for the next 2 days. but its not because the children are still there at the weekend! and routine out the window so baby doesnt nap properly etc

Original poster
Sixyearoldwoes · 05/12/2011 20:35

Aargh! So-long day after wakeful night. Dh out. Did play date for dd1, all three in bed. Hot bath run-magazine, candles. Sink into bath...oh flipping dd2! Sixth sense for relaxing moments! Still - no tears today although a bit if a rant before bedtime.

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juneau · 05/12/2011 21:13

I agree - weekends suck - because you want them to be downtime like they used to be (before you had kids) and, of course, they aren't. So every weekend is an utter letdown!

sweetsantababy · 05/12/2011 21:46

Couldn't agree with juneau more, weekends are crap when you have young DCs. My eldest is 10 and in all these years I have not accepted that weekends are hardcore and overwhelming are not the relaxing thing they used to be pre children. sniff. I try and have a day off in the week (when my youngest is at nursery) and do fuck all nothing. I know this probably won't work for you yet OP but maybe at some point in the not too distant future.