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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be upset about what people think to where I live

25 replies

Vicky0790 · 03/12/2011 22:30

I have two children from previous marriage and two from current. We previously privately rented and when my husband got made redundant we moved to housing ass. My dd best friend's mum has obviously ignored me since and her daughter has told dd her mum doesn't like her. Said child has since told dd that it's because she has a rough family and lives on estate. She has also told other parents this and also to her son who goes to a diff school with ds. I would appreciate advice on how to handle it rather than getting internally angry. Dd has also said she hates living here.

OP posts:
jollyoldstnickschick · 03/12/2011 22:32

Its not forever,its for now and as long as your home is behind your front door then its nobodies business,if friends judge you on where your home is im afraid i wouldnt call them friends.

cat64 · 03/12/2011 22:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

squeakytoy · 03/12/2011 22:36

I wouldnt rise to it. She is clearly a snob, and not worth bothering with.

Anyone can lose their jobs these days. There is no shame in living in a rough area, so long as you dont behave like a rough person (and you can find them living anywhere, from flats to mansions).

frumpet · 03/12/2011 22:38

Silly cow ! lets just hope she doesnt slip from her ivory tower into a gigantic pile of dogshit . I think now would be a good time to remind DD what really matters in life and that GOOD friends , the ones that see you through thick and thin are part of that .

frumpet · 03/12/2011 22:40

Am sitting here willing her boiler to pack up on christmas eve , yours will be fixed for free living in HA , i wonder how much she would have to fork out Grin. Do let me know if my evil larma works !

frumpet · 03/12/2011 22:41

Karma not larma Blush

Original poster
Vicky0790 · 03/12/2011 22:42

Thanks for that and I feel the same but I've left it and left it and thought other people will see her for what she is but she is going around telling so many people and I feel very isolated and feel abit like I'm accepting it by doing nothing. Dd also insists that she can't possibly make any other friends. She is 10 in jan.

OP posts:
tallwivglasses · 03/12/2011 22:42

Are your dd and Mrs Snobby-Arse's dd still best mates though? I presume so, in which case bf probably realises here mother's a shallow, shit-stirring saddo.

I'm much poorer than a lot of dd's friends and our house ain't as flashy. When dd was younger they loved coming here (still do) because it's welcoming, relaxed and fun.

I'm sure others will be along to advise on how to deal with Mrs SA and how to support dd. My attitude, which has stood me in good stead over the years is to just think 'fuck'em' Grin

usualsuspect · 03/12/2011 22:43

Shes not worth a second thought is she?

Ignore the silly cow

SantasStrapon · 03/12/2011 22:44

Karma larma. I like that. Xmas Grin

Vicky, she is someone that you seriously do not need in your life, nor does your DD need to be picking up the warped values of someone like that. Ignore her, hold your head up high, and enjoy the possibility that if frumpets evil powers work, she will be having a very cold and miserable Christmas.

AgentZigzag · 03/12/2011 22:44

'She has also told other parents this and also to her son who goes to a diff school with ds'

I wouldn't give her a second thought, be safe in the knowledge she's making herself look like a twat Smile

Everyone else will know what she's like and avoid her like the plague.

frumpet · 03/12/2011 22:47

I have also wished that none of her turds will flush from the 23rd until the 27th of december for good measure Xmas Smile

frumpet · 03/12/2011 22:47

In her cloakroom , main bathroom or en fucking suite

BeerTricksPotter · 03/12/2011 22:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SantasStrapon · 03/12/2011 22:54

And that her front door breaks and locks them all out. In the rain. On Christmas Eve. It would be particularly unfortunate if that was the same day as the plumbing goes and she can see all the unflushed turds backing up from her bathroom/ensuite etc, cascading down the stairs in a waterfall of shit.

The ceiling could cave in, for good measure.

frillyflower · 03/12/2011 22:55

For what it's worth - I brought up my son in a flat on a very rough council estate in East London. He got a place a great public school (London day school) and ended up going to Oxford.

I loved my home. At least it was ours and we were safe and could live as we liked there. We had friends on that estate (lovely friends - not all council estate tenants are low-life crack addicts!). People who judge you on where you live are shallow, pathetic snobs.

Your daughter is better off with you as her mother than that other horrible woman. Where you live doesn't matter - it's how you live. Tell your daughter that.

frumpet · 03/12/2011 22:57

No its fine santasstrapon aslong as you dont wish actual harm on them ,we can do whatever we want , so i see your shit cascade and notice that at the same time the freezer stuffed with waitrose goodies has chosen that precise moment to pack up

CadetDevilcat · 03/12/2011 23:00

OP I know its difficult to ignore the spiteful stuck up cow - but please try your best to. People will see her for what she is in the end and she will be a lonely miserable hag ....I have seen it happen soooo many times.

Nobody knows what is round the corner for any of us and she shouldn't be feeling so smug about her situation - it may well be about to change for her too.

As long as your DC are well behaved and nice to people - others will see what 'type' of family they come from and all the judgey fuckers will have their 'eye wiped'

Good luck love x

Original poster
Vicky0790 · 03/12/2011 23:02

What doesn't help is that I have an ex who deliberately winds her up about it to get at us and yes he's still single!

OP posts:
runningwilde · 03/12/2011 23:02

What a snotty cow she is! She is not worth your time or energy. I'm sorry you had the misfortune to have such a shitty 'friend' - fuck her the snotty bitch!

AgentZigzag · 03/12/2011 23:04

Your ex deliberately winds your DD up about where she lives?

How old is your DD?

Original poster
Vicky0790 · 03/12/2011 23:05

She is 10 in jan.

OP posts:
Avenged · 03/12/2011 23:06

I'm actually sitting here chuckling to myself about how snobby this woman is. I would pity her TBH, with an attitude like that.

If anyone asks why she isn't bothering with you anymore, you could tell them the truth....... that SHE has chosen to not have anything to do with you ever since your OH was made redundant and you all had to move into a housing association place. Nowt better than true info coming from the horses mouth (and all that) IYSWIM.

The half-decent folk will see her for the type of person she really is.

SantasStrapon · 03/12/2011 23:22

Heh, heh, heh that meltdown is so going to happen cos the shit cascade blew the fuses. On the day that her DD forgot to shut the freezer door...

frumpet · 03/12/2011 23:31

The thing is ,i bet this woman is only three generations from working down the mine/ in the mill / in service . So for extra good measure im sending her a not in the least bit painful but still hideously disfiguring huge spot right on the end of her nose Xmas Grin

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