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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

15 year old babysitting 16 month old?

31 replies

BogeysOnMyShoulders · 02/12/2011 13:09

So we have been invited to an Xmas party this evening at a soft play centre about 15 mins max. drive away from 6.30-8.30pm. DH will not be back from work.

I was intending to take all 3 DS's including my 16 month old DS3. DD (the 15 yr old) understandably does not want to come. DS3 is a bit snotty and miserable today (no temp) and is usually in bed at around 6pm so will be miserable being kept up anyway.

I am now thinking of putting him to bed and then going with the other DS's who are desperate to go (otherwise I would not bother going at all).

DD will have instructions not to take DS3 out of his cot if he wakes up (which he sometimes does and usually goes back down with a pat and dummy reinserted). If he does not go back down, she can call me and I will come straight back.

I know this was OK years ago because my older sisters and myself would babysit our younger siblings all the time (I can remember taking my 6 week old nephew out in his pram into town when I was no more than 13) and I used to babysit strangers DCs from the age of 14. Still need reassurance though!

WWYD and AIBU?

OP posts:
StaceymAloneForver · 02/12/2011 13:12

I used to babysit when i was 13 for next door neighbors (although my own parents were next door)

I would say YANBU, a 15yo knows how to use a phone, who to phone etc in case of emergency, if baby is asleep i'd say go for it!

marzipananimal · 02/12/2011 13:14

YANBU, I babysat at that age, only 10 years ago.

TroublesomeEx · 02/12/2011 13:15

As she is his sister, I would definitely leave her to babysit. You know whether she is responsible enough, which is more relevant that her age.

Is there a neighbour or friend who can be aware and whose number she can have 'just in case'?

ErnesttheBavarian · 02/12/2011 13:21

I would def do it. For sure.

Minor hijack - what about same situation, but the siblings are mature 13 (who is used to bing alone) and 4?

Or 14 and 5?

mumofbumblebea · 02/12/2011 13:23

i don't see the problem. many 15 y/o girls have their own chilldren! and i bet your daughter is more sensible than a lot of them and they won't be supervised all the time! i wouldn't be too fussy about insisting she doesn't get him up though. if he is being grouchy she might find it easier to get him up and read him a few stories rather than have to listen to him screaming! won't hurt him for one night. as you said, if she is having difficulty she can call u!

StaceymAloneForver · 02/12/2011 13:24

ernes if little one was asleep i would say it's not too much of a problem with 14 and 5, as they both know the expectation (to some degree in the 5yo)

when i was 14 (10years ago) i used to babysit for a 1 yo, 4yo and 6yo

kreechergotstuckupthechimney · 02/12/2011 13:25

Op, I wouldn't hesitate, Ernest nor would I in your situation.

Moominsarescary · 02/12/2011 13:26

My 16 year old has looked after my 8 year old and 8 month old, he also looked after his 7 year old brother when he was 15.

As long as she's happy I don't see a problem I babysat at 14 for 4 children ranging from 11 months to 8 years

caramelwaffle · 02/12/2011 13:27

Bogeys It's absolutely fine.

Ernest Both your examples are fine also.

exoticfruits · 02/12/2011 13:31

Fine-in less than a year she is old enough to be married herself.
With the instructions and the fact she can get you and you will be back it will be fine.

TheSecondComing · 02/12/2011 13:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Insomnia11 · 02/12/2011 13:33

Some 15 year olds have their own 16 month old #justsaying

ErnesttheBavarian · 02/12/2011 13:34

thanks :)

OP you feeling brave?

SHoHoHodan · 02/12/2011 13:46

I know ds2 is older than your little one (ds2 is 4) but I left his 15 year old brother in charge of him just last night for the first time while I went to karate. So about the time scale (and ds1 had to put ds2 to bed as well).

It all went swimmingly and I'm not quite sure why I was so concerned. DS1 took it completely in his stride.

Be brave and do it! Grin

Kayano · 02/12/2011 13:49

I'd say that's fine!

Trills · 02/12/2011 13:49

She's not just any 15 year old, she knows the baby (and he knows her) and knows what to do.

seeker · 02/12/2011 13:51

Why can't she take hr little brother out of his cot and give him a cuddle?

bachsingingmum · 02/12/2011 13:52

I think this is absolutely fine - you will know your DD.

I was shocked however at my DH's office do a few years ago to hear from one couple that they had left their 12 year old in charge of three younger siblings including a 6m old baby. The party was an hour's drive away, but apparently it was OK because grandma was only 1/2 hour away...

MudAndGlitter · 02/12/2011 13:52

Do it. And have fun at the party Smile

TheFeministsWife · 02/12/2011 13:56

Completely fine. I remember babysitting my 1 year old niece when I was 13 for a few hours. I also left dd2 who was 18 months at the time with 15 year old DSD for a few hours.

33goingon64 · 02/12/2011 13:57

Yes. I would leave my niece with DS in a couple of years when she turns 15. I wouldn't leave him with a strange 15 yr old though. I used to babysit all ages of kids when I was a teenager and now I wonder what those parents were thinking! But your own DD? do it!

Marymaryalittlecontrary · 02/12/2011 14:06

I think it's fine. I personally would let her pick him up out of his cot if he starts crying as well. She is his sister, surely he knows her well enough to stop crying if she cuddled him. Would it really matter for one night if you came home and he was awake and being cuddled on the sofa?

NeuromanticisedVisionsofXmas · 02/12/2011 14:09

Why leave her to babysit if shes not allowed to actually touch the baby? I was babysitting at 12 and half the 15 year olds on my estate already had babies of their own!

Trills · 02/12/2011 14:12

Why can't she take hr little brother out of his cot and give him a cuddle?

Because then he will wake up properly instead of re-settling within a minute or two, and much more work to babysit.

It's not that she can't, it's that this is the best way to keep him happy and asleep.

seeker · 02/12/2011 14:18

Ah1 sorry, misunderstood. Though it was like those bizarre "don't answer the telephone" instructions some people give their children when they are home on their own!

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