Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

to speak to head about this

14 replies

DaisyheadMayzie · 30/11/2011 22:37

DD is 5. Yesterday she came home from school and told us that there had been a fight at school between two year 2 boys. One pushed the other out of the sandpit and, according to DD, the other reacted quite violently, punching and kicking the instigator. DS (8) said he saw the instigator being led away by an older girl, crying, so I assume it was a fairly serious event. DD says lots of kids were standing around watching and she 'got tears in her eyes' and went to find a teacher. She found one walking into the office and told her that there was a fight and the teacher answered 'I'm not the duty teacher, you need to find MrsX'.

DD couldn't find Mrs X and the fight ended without a teacher witnessing it.

I'm not very comfortable with this. It's a nice school and fortunately fights are rare (I've not been told of one before), but I am rather concerned by the attitude of the teacher. I'm umming and ahhing about saying something to DD's teacher, but maybe that's not the best - should I be saying something to the head or the head of infants? This teacher is a yr 1 teacher, first year qualified and very young - she will be DD's teacher in January so I don't want to get off on the wrong foot with her.

Or do I just leave it? She could have been in a rush or thought DD was telling tales (I don't think DD is particularly bad at telling tales, but this teacher has a class with 2/3 girls and there have been issues over tale telling)

WWYD?

OP posts:

suebfg · 30/11/2011 22:42

I'd have a word with your DD's teacher.

handsomeharry · 30/11/2011 22:44

Honestly? I wouldn't be giving it a second thought.

DebbieDoesSanta · 30/11/2011 22:44

leave it ..kids fight

It's not nice , it's not big, it's not clever but it's part of life

hocuspontas · 30/11/2011 22:45

Why was there no staff outside? Either the duty teacher, or midday staff if it was lunchtime?

auntiepicklebottom2 · 30/11/2011 22:47

where was the staff, wasn't there no one outside.

WorraLiberty · 30/11/2011 22:49

I suppose you could find the teacher who was on duty and ask why she didn't see it...but I imagine the parents of the two kids fighting will probably ask that anyway.

Personally, I'd leave it in the hands of the school.

Original poster

DaisyheadMayzie · 30/11/2011 23:00

Don't know where the duty teacher was - she should have been patrolling the school grounds so was, I guess, in another area. It has been grumbled about amongst some parents that the cover at lunch/playtimes is not great - one teacher for the whole school as far as I know. We aren't in the UK so there probably aren't any rules about this.

I'm not too concerned about the fight - that sounds terrible, but I mean, yes, 6 year olds fight, I don't think any blood was spilled, and it is rare. My concern was the reaction of the teacher who was told about it and wasn't interested.

But if the majority think it OK to just leave it, then leave it I will - it's easier!

OP posts:

MrsJasonBourne · 30/11/2011 23:13

I think to be honest I'd find said teacher and say 'when a child comes to you clearly upset about something, instead of saying 'not my job' don't you think you ought to just check?'

Imagine if the children had been hurt and she could have been there in time to prevent it?

slavetofilofax · 30/11/2011 23:23

YABU.

The duty teacher will have known or found out about it anyway if there were lots of children watching and one was upset.

And you shouldn't judge teh teacher for what she said to your dd, you have no idea what she needed to do with her time instead. It could have been something very important, or it could simply have been her first chance to go to the toilet that day.

At school, children have to learn the rules, and if one of the rules is to go to a member of staff on duty at lunchtimes, then that is what the children need to learn to do.

If you are concerned about the level of supervision at lunchtime, then that is a separate issue that you can talk to the head about without mentioning this incident.

slavetofilofax · 30/11/2011 23:26

You also have to bear in mind that your dd will not always be able to tell you exactly what happened accurately, because she is only little, and teachers have to listen to lots of children telling them about what other children are doing.

hocuspontas · 01/12/2011 08:14

I'd be more concerned about the level of care generally and the fact that your dd can wander in and out of the school building without supervision. The other teacher was busy!

LoveBeingAFirework · 01/12/2011 08:20

How does your daughter feel? She was obviously upset by the fight, has it knocked her confidence I her teachers?

TroublesomeEx · 01/12/2011 08:30

children generally can get in and out of school. otherwise they wouldn't be able to go to the loo. and they are expected to do so, and follow the associated rules, at 5.

It's difficult. I've had children come to me with similar complaints and gone to sort them out and it's taken the whole of playtime and I've then had to leave the children with the TA for the first few minutes of the next lesson, either because the issue is ongoing, or whilst I go do the wee I was called away from, or to get a glass of water because I still need to maintain physical homeostasis! I'm sure parents would have something to say about that too!

I've also gone outside to find it was nothing but Joe was crying because Sam had picked up the stick Joe wanted before Joe could get to it.

The report "Miss, Joe and Sam are fighting" is the same.

I'd leave it too.

Original poster

DaisyheadMayzie · 02/12/2011 01:23

Thanks everyone. DD seems fine, she hasn't mentioned it since the day it happened so I don't think she is traumatised.

We aren't in the UK, all the school buildings and classrooms are accessible from the outside - she saw the teacher outside going into the hall, so yes, completely likely that she was on her way to do something.

Thanks again

OP posts:

Flip