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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask what you would have done? (a Tesco thread!)

20 replies

PopcornMouse · 30/11/2011 10:38

I am an AIBU virgin, so please be kind Blush Apologies this is so long.

This happened over two weeks ago, but whenever I think about it I feel really guilty that I just stood and did nothing, and I'd really value your opinions :(

I was in a big Tesco Extra store on a Saturday afternoon, perusing the booze aisle Blush . Some teenage lad had been stocking the shelves with mixers, when his superior (I don't know he was an actual manager or just fulltime staff or what) - a rather big/well-built middle-aged man - came over. The lad said to his superior/manager he had managed to do x amount of the shelf, and the superior started having a go at him about not having done it, and started accusing him of lying about having done it when he clearly hadn't. The poor lad defended himself quite valiantly, repeating that he'd said he's done x-amount of it.

Anyway, things escalated til the superior was out and out shouting at this poor lad in the middle of the store . The teen at one point said "I can't believe you're talking to me like this on the shop floor" and the superior just kept shouting. In the end, the lad said (and I'm not sure there was anything else he could have done at this point) "my shift is over, we'll talk about this in the office when I come in tomorrow". Cue lots of "no we won't, we'll talk about this here, now!" At this point I honestly thought the superior was going to grab the lad and punch detain him - instead, the boy walked out of the aisle and went out the back (I assume) and after a moment of jaw clenching, the superior charged after. Goodness knows what happened after that, I but I'd assume at some point between 1pm Saturday and 10am Sunday, this boy lost his job.

Now I'm sure there will have been mitigating circumstances - people don't shout at people who are generally good workers (do they?) - but showing that level of agression on the shop floor is wholly unprofessional. I was very intimidated.

Thinking back I'd have loved to walk over to the superior/manager and tell that every employee in entitled to dignity in the workplace, and that he was being very, very unprofessional and, frankly, needed to get a grip. But he honestly looked like he was about to flip and I was afraid it would be directed at me (fwiw, I'm a twenty-something girl ).

Getting home, I wished I'd reported it to the store manager, but a) I didn't see his badge to take his name, and b) I was kind of worried I'd ask for the manager and he would walk out of the office iykwim Blush

Either way I'm heartily ashamed to say I just left the store, having watched a young man just take all this abuse :(

WIBU to have not gotten involved? What would you have done? I'm honestly kicking myself over it, and I feel really rotten that I could have intervened and didn't, as I'm sure this boy won't have been the first and won't be the last :(

OP posts:
aldiwhore · 30/11/2011 10:41

I'd write a letter exclaiming your shock at the behaviour of the supervisor.

You were right not to wade in, though I agree you 'should' have said something to another manager, but then, shoulda woulda coulda, hindsight is a wonderful thing isn't it?

You can still do something.

HughBastard · 30/11/2011 10:41

I'd be inclined to put the facts as you saw them down in a letter or email and send to head office.

Were any other customers there?

ViviPru · 30/11/2011 10:41

I would absolutely have got involved, but YANBU for not having done. Its not too late to report this. I contract for Tesco so I'm familiar with the culture and I know at head office they will take this kind of thing very seriously.

Esta3GG · 30/11/2011 10:42

I am sure the lad can fight his own battles.
However as a customer you should complain to the management - you don't expect this kind of staff fracas to take place on the shop floor, what kind of cruddy bullying organisation are they etc etc.

squeakytoy · 30/11/2011 10:44

It sounds like you were stood there earwigging for quite a while...

You dont know the full story, there could be a background to the employee who was shelf stacking, but it isnt professional behaviour on a shop floor, I agree.

AKMD · 30/11/2011 10:45

I would have said at the beginning that I'd just seen him stock the shelves, then if it had carried on I would have approached customer services and asked for the store manager.

I know it's a few weeks on but the 2nd part is still open to you. If the incident escalated, they will know who you're talking about.

Original poster
PopcornMouse · 30/11/2011 10:46

It's not too late, even though I don't know his name? I will have a look at their website and see if I can find an email address to contact. I suppose if he did get sacked, it will be pretty obvious who I'm referring to...

There was nobody else there (very odd for a Saturday afternoon, but there could have been sports on I suppose) - just me, and them.

OP posts:
Original poster
PopcornMouse · 30/11/2011 10:47

squeaky yes it was about 2-3 minutes. I was sort of shocked, I think, not sure what to do? I was choosing a bottle of wine (or trying to)

OP posts:
ViviPru · 30/11/2011 10:48

They will know who it was if you give them the specific time and date, particularly if it was quiet at the time.

PontyMython · 30/11/2011 10:49

Please complain, that was incredibly unprofessional. Regardless of any previous misbehaviour by the boy. Even if he actually deserved the telling off, it should not have been done in front of customers as it gives customers very poor service.

In the letter/email please also write that you saw the boy was upset but that he did well not to falter or retaliate - in case the other man tries to say he did (wouldn't put it past him)

PontyMython · 30/11/2011 10:52

He should not have been sacked, there are pretty clear rules about how you fire someone and although it happens on telly all the time, it doesn't usually result from a shouting match. And if it has, he will probably get into masses of trouble.

If anything possibly the supervisor is more likely to get instantly dismissed because of gross misconduct?

lborolass · 30/11/2011 10:58

Yes, I definitely do something. If I had time on the day I would have asked for the manager and told him then but I know thats not always possible so if not I would have rung the store directly (the numbers on the till receipt I think) and told him over the phone.

In fact I wouldn't have been able to stop myself saying something at the time Smile

I wouldn't woryy about them not being able to identify the staff involved, I'm sure the store grapevine will know. If it was my child I'd want someone to stick up for him.

DesperatelySeekingPomBears · 30/11/2011 10:59

Tbh I very much doubt he'll have been sacked. I used to work in Tesco when I was a student and the managers were capable of being pretty vile, especially at this time of year when the store is hectic. Once they got into the warehouse the lad probably gave as good as he got.

HexagonalQueenOfTheSummer · 30/11/2011 11:01

I was in a fast food restaurant once, being served by a young teenage lad who was getting shouted at the whole time by a more senior male member of staff whilst he served me. I was stood there for about 10 minutes at the counter and in the end I said to the senior member of staff "I think you are being a bully and I certainly don't wish to listen to your voice whilst I'm waiting to be served". He looked very sheepish and stopped shouting immediately.

I would have said something to the manager in Tesco, it's disgusting behaviour regardless of what the young lad had done.

2madboys · 30/11/2011 11:14

Please say something. I had a Saturday job when I was a teenager where the manager/owner spoke to me like this all the time. I had no experience, they basically gave me no training but expected me to know everything about the job. When a customer pulled her up on the way she spoke to me I was so happy. It didn't change anything, but definitely made me feel better. The job totally wrecked my confidence. I spent the whole week dreading Saturdays. When I got a new job in another shop (a chain store), I was pleasantly surprised that I was actually very good at it.

Original poster
PopcornMouse · 30/11/2011 11:29

I have checked my bank statement Blush it was Thursday 17th Nov. I am off to email customer services; if I hear back I will let you know.

Thanks so much for all the advice. I am Shock how many of you have had or witnessed crappy managers, though - I have obviously been very lucky.

OP posts:
ViviPru · 30/11/2011 11:31

Good for you Pop . 'S people like you make the world go round, you know.

ImperialBlether · 30/11/2011 11:57

Popcorn, the date on your bank statement doesn't necessarily match the actual date - I get a few going in on one date.

Original poster
PopcornMouse · 30/11/2011 12:13

Imperial it matches up with DH's shifts, so I'm pretty sure it's right :)

OP posts:
Original poster
PopcornMouse · 30/11/2011 12:17

(and, embarassingly, I remember what I bought and I mentioned it was horrid somewhere else on MN, so I also checked there! Blush )

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