Not sure whether this should go here or in relationships, so please don?t flame me. And apologies for length.
Background: My flatmate loves Christmas with a almost child-like passion. He?s trying to recreate the magic of his childhood Christmases, rather than the ones he suffered in his married, and divorced, life. So he?s bought lots of decorations, wants dinner with me before I go to my mothers, etc. We?ve always celebrated it at some point near the actual day, and always enjoyed it. Last year I was peeved that he put the decorations up in the two hours I?d gone to pay a friend a visit, as I?d wanted input in it, especially as I was staying here that year and not him, but never mind.
This year he?s staying here. He?s been playing Christmas music for the last month (on one time waking me up in the night it was on so loud) and basically been getting into the mood for a while. He?s been planning how he?s going to decorate for weeks, though I did ask if we could wait for November (which seemed reasonable to me!).
So last night he starts cleaning the house, throwing out a sofa we no longer need (he?s getting a replacement, but in the meantime there?s more room for the tree), but assured me he was only ?getting ready? to decorate. Part of the problem is he?s working away next week so reckons he doesn?t have much time to do it. But then he put up window decorations, and changed bulbs in the ceiling to coloured ones.
Now it was these bulbs which bugged me the most: they are bright and I knew I?d get a headache from them quickly, so I said I?d take them down whilst he?s away. But apparently I can?t, as they want work again. I MIGHT have said I?d remove them anyway, but probably wouldn?t have done so but just got a lamp. I work at the table in there, and was planning lots of studying whilst he?s away, but the room?s too dark to not have lights on, which is why I was peeved. They would have been bad enough just on, but trying to work with them ? no way.
Talking of work, I had an assignment I needed to do last night which I couldn?t do at the table, so I tried to work as best I could in my room. He told me he was going out to a friend who?d asked him over for a drink (tho? his phone didn?t go), only to come home 2 mins later as she wasn?t in. He then took to his room and put music on, which was annoying me, so I went down to his shed to study (there?s a chair, table, heat and light there so better than my room). Before I moved down there I realised he?d taken out the coloured bulbs which seemed a waste, but looked up replacements and checked with him (by text) that the ones I?d found would work. He told me to ?forget about it? as he?d changed his plans, and would just decorate his room and shed, as my thoughts re Christmas were different to his, and he no longer wanted to put anything up. He also said he wanted to go to his shed but couldn?t, as I was there. Yeah, having been driven out of the house.
I gave up and went for a long, long walk (as he obviously didn?t want me near him), not getting back til after he was in bed. I came home to find the window decorations removed. I know how much having them up meant to him, so his taking them down was a sure sign of his hurt.
So, who?s BU here? I KNOW Christmas means a lot to him, and more than anything want him to have a good one, but I?m alone in the house for 10 days and really don?t see why I had to put up with lights which would mean I couldn?t work where I need to when he wasn?t there to appreciate them anyway. But he?s now acting like a hormonal teenager (he?s late 40s, so anything but) and spoiling his owns plans to make a point. I?m feeling awful, walking on eggshells and can?t wait for him to leave.
Advice anyone?