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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be feeling a bit moany after spending 1000 quid on an unenjoyable holiday and catching the sniffles?

30 replies

likethemoon · 26/11/2011 14:34

Just returned from South Africa, meant to be a birthday treat.
Immigration were very rude on entry. We were expecting warmish weather as it's the start of their summer, but it rained constantly. Almost every attempt at conversation was met with some reference to colour or race, understandable given the history but still rather offputting. One of our friends got mugged (to be fair he did do something risky, i.e. go out late at night and come back from the minibus taxi terminus downtown) and we got fleeced by all the meter taxis. The connecting flight was delayed so we almost missed the returning one to the UK. Now I'm feeling like I'm coming down with a cold (air conditioning on the plane, probably) and have masses of housework to catch up on! I know we're lucky to have been able to travel at all etc but surely IANBU to feel this was a colossal waste of time - just want somewhere to vent!!

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 26/11/2011 14:40

Was there anything positive out of it?

I admit it isnt a place that would be my choice of holiday destination. I am sure the scenery in places is amazing, but too many other factors would put me off.

jasminerice · 26/11/2011 14:42

This is why I don't bother going on holiday anymore. It never seems to live up to expectations. The best holiday we've had recently was a week in Bournemouth!

Original poster
likethemoon · 26/11/2011 14:56

Not really, to be honest...we met a few friendly people which always helps but overall it was pretty lousy! Know what you mean jasmine - don't think I'll bother myself for a while now (well, can't afford it now anyway!)

OP posts:
ninah · 26/11/2011 14:59

have a Biscuit

MumblingAndBloodyRagDoll · 26/11/2011 14:59

YABU. Some people dream of having as much as a thousand pounds to spend on a holiday. You sound spoilt and miserable.

MollieO · 26/11/2011 15:01

I've been twice with ds. Just the two of us. Once when he was 2 and the second time when he was 5. We travelled along the Garden Route and spent time in different places including Cape Town. Our experience was overwhelmingly positive. Everyone we met was helpful and kind. We never had a single conversation about race. We visited a friend's township project and ds was welcomed with open arms by the local children despite being a different colour and wearing shoes (unlike most of the children).

Ds made friends with local children on the beach and we had an utterly lovely time on both holidays.

thousandDenier · 26/11/2011 15:02

I dream of having £1000 to pay my rent and bills!

Have a lemsip and a Biscuit

Original poster
likethemoon · 26/11/2011 15:03

I thought that type of comment would pop up, if I was spoilt and miserable I wouldn't have said that I know we're lucky to have been able to manage at all.

OP posts:
HeadfirstForHalos · 26/11/2011 15:04

TBH I think you only enjoy a holiday if you make the most of it. We've been camping in torrential rain in the highlands and had a great time. If we had taken the "Oh this is horrible" attitude then we'd have had a rubbish experience.

MollieO · 26/11/2011 15:05

I'd add that you got off lightly if you only spent £1000 bearing in mind the airfare is usually £700+.

Original poster
likethemoon · 26/11/2011 15:09

I have been more than once, and had a different experience when I was with local friends from university. I had a much more positive experience that time in Joburg. I was particularly close to one friend and her kids and the kids all played with each other in a similar way to what Mollie describes.

This time I was in Cape Town and then went up to Durban, and the experience without being with local people was completely different. Perhaps just a bad luck of the draw.

I know a lot of people don't have 1000 pounds to spend on a holiday, and I wish that they could be in the same position but that doesn't mean that this wasn't a waste of money - in fact it highlights the fact it was a waste of money even more.

OP posts:
Lilyloo · 26/11/2011 15:11

That does seem a snapshot of a few parts of your holiday. There must have been good points to ?
I can imagine rain every day when you have travelled so far is slightly depressing on it's own though.
Although we still managed some good points in our annual rain filled camping holiday this year !

Original poster
likethemoon · 26/11/2011 15:14

Well yes, probably a little over 1000, that was a rounding down. We paid approx 650 for the fare, which I stupidly did by cashing an ISA, but that's another story.

It's true it is what you make of it. It's just I went with such a positive attitude, and was really looking forward to it, and showing everyone around, especially after having such a good experience the time before. Just a bit disappointed I suppose.

OP posts:
MollieO · 26/11/2011 15:29

Where in SA did you go?

Shodan · 26/11/2011 15:30

It's always miserable when something you've looked forward to doesn't live up to expectations (or hopes!), but when you've spent lots of money on it it makes it worse.

TBH SA isn't somewhere I'd go again- I've been once, because DH grew up there, but as far as I'm concerned that was enough. It wasn't that it wasn't pretty, or that it rained (it is, and it did, every day)- it just didn't 'grab me' like other places have.

Although I might consider going again for Jimmy's Killer Prawns. Grin

ouryve · 26/11/2011 15:31

Haven't been on holiday for years. It's just too stressful.

TangerinePuppet · 26/11/2011 15:32

My heart bleeds Hmm

Earlybird · 26/11/2011 15:36

OP - think you're getting a bit of a hard time here.

The main issue for me is this: why did you 'stupidly' (to use your word) cash in an ISA to take a holiday?

Original poster
likethemoon · 26/11/2011 15:39

I'm not pretending this is a serious problem in the scheme of things by any means, this was meant to be in a similar tone to Shodan's post, who summed it all up in her first sentence.

I've been to Joburg (northern suburbs, downtown, Tembisa and Soweto townships) Cape Town (Camps Bay, Langa and Gugulethu townships) Durban, the North West province (Rustenburg and Mafikeng). I have stayed in both hotels and with friends who have family living in townships, so have seen the different sides. It is pretty, and has got a lot going for it, like I said this time was just a disappointment, and so not worth the time or money IMO.

OP posts:
PrincessJellyBaby · 26/11/2011 15:43

I feel for you. We all want holidays to relax and unwind and escape from our lives. And I know many people can't afford £1000, but tbh, for a holiday like you were hoping for, I'd have easily paid more (actually, I did - £2500 when we went to SA for 2.5 weeks at xmas last year).

And when you pay that money you want something special. Its rotten when things don't live up to expectations, often when you have no control over things. I agree that simple holidays in the UK, where you have lower expectations often turn out to be more fun.

Our trip was mixed, but there were definitely some highlights. I hope that once you're annoyance has settled down, some of the positives will rise to the surface and you can remember those instead.

Holidays are a minefield!!

Original poster
likethemoon · 26/11/2011 15:44

Earlybird - I'm wondering the same myself! But DP and our friends were very keen to do something nice for my birthday, which I don't usually bother much with and as I'd given SA good reviews before they wanted to see it, especially in summer.

As DP said himself, it's the fact that it didn't justify the money. But say I hadn't mentioned the money at all - most people wouldn't want to go a long way to have an average to poor experience, I don't think that's so outlandish.

OP posts:
MollieO · 26/11/2011 15:47

I'm even more impressed you did all that for £350!

Original poster
likethemoon · 26/11/2011 15:51

Mollie, most of that was done the previous time, I was mentioning all the places I've been in SA in general. That one cost a lot, lot more, but I didn't mind because the DCs loved it. And it probably was a bit more than 350 this time, although DP paid for the accommodation so probably not that much more from my side.

It's not all about the money, as I've said. It's more the disappointment. Anyway, can't really expand much more on this one.

OP posts:
MollieO · 26/11/2011 16:02

Your OP doesn't read as if you have travelled extensively in SA before. Instead it reads as if this is your experience of this country and what a waste of time and money it was going there. I haven't been to as many places there as you as I've only been twice for a total of nearly 6 weeks but I loved every minute and can't wait to go back again.

jaquelinehyde · 26/11/2011 16:14

It's rainy season at the moment in SA though isn't it? So not sure why you are upset that it rained everyday?

Your friend was a fool to put himself at risk they way he did and tourists always get fleeced.

Holidays always wear me out and I need a week at home to get over it and I have never holidayed outside the UK, so travelling all that way for a miserable time must be depressing but that's the risk you take with holidays, a great time is never guaranteed.