to send my dd1 to prep school in jan rather than next sept

[scrummummy]

Hi I've never made a thread before and have only occasionally posted but a huge lurker(sorry).
Background sorry : I have 2 DD's and DD1 currently goes to the local state school but we've had a great amount of bullying and assault in reception ( we had to get SS involved) but the schools reaction was to separate my DD and the other girl. It hasn't worked when the other girl is naughty (every day if not multiple times) she gets moved into my DD's class.
I started work in Sept( after 5 years as a SAHM) so we can afford to move her to a prep school but we hoped that the schools hopeful reaction to the bullying would mean that we could put her into prep Y3 not pre-prep Y1/2 (DD is now in Y1). Anyway My DD2 has been accepted to pre-prep for foundation 1 (age 4) for next sept 2012.
We were hoping to put DD1 into the same school for Y2 sept 2012 but they cannot guarantee a place but they can give us a place for Jan 2012.
This would get her away from the bullying and help her to improve she is not learning ( she is one of 9 pupils out of 97 in her year who's English is their first language) Her new school she would be in a class of 13 in her year.

The problem I have if it is a problem is that to take DD1 to school for Jan I will have to travel 30 mins in the opposite direction and back and add on 45 mins to get to work, so leave house 7.15 drop off at school at 8, get to work by 9.30 latest. We are planning to move closer to the school this summer but cannot do it now ( thankfully only renting but cannot afford deposit 1months rent plus 1 terms school fees and nursery fees all in 1 months pay and £800 for 2 school places have to pay no matter when she starts)

I suppose my question is:( or my DH question is) do we hope for the best that she gets a place in sept and hope that nothing gets worse for the next 2 terms at her school or move her (she went to a trial day this week and was top of the class and the school would love to love her) ?

What are your reservations about it? If you are going to put her there in September, why not in January? The time taken travelling is nothing in comparison to your daughters welfare and your peace of mind under the current circumstances I would have thought.

I've witnessed a similar situation. Move her as fast as you can. Sounds like it will be a lovely place for her to thrive.

I wouldn't want to take the chance of losing the place and would rather see it as an opportunity to go where it seems she will be happiest sooner than anticipated.

it will be but i've just started working and we've had a horrible year I was diagnosed with cancer earlier in the year am now fine but we've just finished paying off all our debts and had budgeted for sept. Can afford it in jan but it will be tight. I'm going to be paying for all school childcare from my salary, which i was expecting just not this quick.

I'd move her. The traveling sounds like a pain, but if you're planning to move anyway it'd be a temporary thing and the fact that there's an end in sight should make it easier. Besides your DD will probably be a lot happier there if she's being bullied at her current school, 2 terms is a long time if you're only 5 years old!

Also I know we can do this as it's been so bad for her in her school but my DH thinks if she can get in now she can get in in sept, which would give us more time to pay in advance for school but the thing I was shocked at was she was sexually touched by another 5 year old and my council couldn't move her to another school( though part of me wondered why my DD had to move)
When I say the headmistress she said that she couldn't do anything as it could be seen as discrimination other girl was black but so is 50% of the school (38% Asian, 9% eastern European and the rest white British)and as we are the only Jewish family at the school it wasn't fair in her opinion if she had to penalise that other girl. grrrrrrr.

I'd move her in January. We drive ds 30mins (depending on traffic) to school. I was worried about the driving but it's actually a good chance to chat with him without any distractions of tv, games, friends etc. It will be a rush for you to get off to work, but as you are hoping to move anyway that should only be short term

If I did drive it would be about a 10/15 min drive but we live in London so we've never had a car. A car was something we thought of getting next year but everything has just moved up by 6 months and I just want to make sure we are not going be screwed financially. as I said I've started work in sept so have passed my companies probationary period but don't feel so secure , fairly but not completely.

Sexually touched at SCHOOL at FIVE YEARS OLD?! & bullied? I know you've had a tough year & the circumstances aren't ideal... But you have said you can afford it. So do you really need to be even asking this question? Get her to prep school in Jan!

Move her!

I still want to cry every time I think about the fact that we left DS1 in his state primary school for another two hellish terms after securing a prep school place for him. I was so stressed it didn't even occur to me I could just ask them to take him from the day he passed the exam.

He's 16 now and has thrived in school ever since but I know I'll always regret the misery of his first primary school.

I do a 2.5 hour trip by car some evenings to get 9 year old DD from her prep school - it's draining but worth it for the right school.