Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

...To think that Year 7 girls are evil personified...??!

35 replies

misspollysdolly · 23/11/2011 16:33

DD started secondary school in September. The first half term was fairly good, but now 10 weeks or whatever into term the rubber is really hitting the road and a lot of the girls are showing their true colours. Bitchiness beyond belief and eternal 'goalpost shifting' - really horrid. I am in no doubt that my DD is as much a part of the 'thing' and I know she doesn't always help herself, but she has always found friendships challenging and 'sticky' and it is very hard to have to watch her buffeted around in the pre-pubescent storm.

I'd love to hear anyone else's experiences of supporting their children through this time of life. What do you let go and what do you respond to? How do you hear but not get dragged into the whole sordid thing? What advice or support do you give to your DC when they are in a mess with friends? Does it ever improve??!

OP posts:
PerUnaBomber · 23/11/2011 17:56

Y7 - certainly the first half term, it did get better after that (largely due to the arrival of a new girl who became my best friend and all of a sudden we were the popular ones who the others wanted to befriend) - was definitely hellish for me.

I remember many a break time wandering around on my own or playing British Bulldogs with the boys. And as I was at an international school that went all the way through from Kindergarten to Y13 with the same groupings, it was all the more bizarre as the exact same girls had been in my class for Y6 and we all got on fine then. Equally, when we moved into the upper school for Y8, things remained calm - possibly as we had got the awful hormonal year under our belts and were now the runts of the school, rather than the kings of the middle school.

If it's any consolation, it was just the one half term of hardship and then things settled down - I think my mum just let me get on with it, we didn't involve teachers or anything, though we knew there was a new girl starting and I think the teacher had spotted I was having some ishoos and made me her buddy (one of the benefits of the transience of international schools - possibly not the same at schools here).

My teacher also put me in a different 'activity' from the girls in my class - I did library and they all did pottery or something - on Thursday afternoons, presumably to get me away from an environment where the ostracism would be more noticeable in an unstructured class.

Just one of those things you have to ride out, as others have said, lots of listening to woes, sympathising and maybe try to find something outside school (I had guides, gymnastics, church, swimming and tennis) with completely different kids to socialise with at the weekends if needed - plus LOADS of shopping trips and ice creams. Good luck - sending a Wine your way, if that's your thing!

bigTillyMint · 23/11/2011 18:03

Nah, all was fab and fine in Y7. No problems with old or new friendships. Now in Y8, there seem to be a couple of girls in the group who are being a little bit mean at times, but nothing major.

Andrewofgg · 23/11/2011 18:03

I never had a daughter, mercifully, but as a brother and an uncle I can confirm that they do rejoin our species eventually - you all did!

SlinkingOutsideInSocks · 23/11/2011 18:06

What age is Y7? I'm not. In the UK.

PosiesOfPoinsettia · 23/11/2011 18:08

I have a year 5 boy who is suffering at the hands of really early bitching from some one little bitch girls.

MildlyNarkyPuffin · 23/11/2011 18:26

Year 7 = they turn 12 that school year
Year 8 = they turn 13 that school year

etc

MildlyNarkyPuffin · 23/11/2011 18:27

I hope it does Shakirasma.

flatbellyfella · 23/11/2011 18:28

My nieces daughter would not go to school today because of other girls bullying her , it was the same last week , school says they will sort it out, but never do, it just gets done in different places & ways, The little girl has never had a dad , the bastard went off with another woman 6 months into the pregnancy. He has never seen what a beautiful child he fathered , other kids know this fact through their parents gossiping. I know she longs for male company from my time spent playing ball games with her and her cousins of a similar age. Children that lack confidence find it so hard to get through school as it is, without having to put up with bullying.

Toughasoldboots · 23/11/2011 18:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

seekinginspiration · 23/11/2011 18:51

Year 7 was an awful year.DD1 was quite a confident child at this age and I made her write a letter of apology to another girl because she had been very unkind to that girl. i only knew because I knew the other girl's mum. But not surprisingly that girl was really bitchy back and her mum didn't make her send a letter of apology!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page