Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be annoyed with the lady who has been feeding our cats?

15 replies

SouthernandCross · 23/11/2011 16:14

Two years ago in January we got a lurcher puppy. The foster home she had been born into had cats and she had learnt to leave those alone, and our cats (7/8 years ) were used to our old dog, so I assumed that with some careful introductions, it would all work out in the end.
Unfortunately, it didn't. The Lurcher barked at the cats from her crate and they moved out to live in the utility room ( cat door gives them access to it without having to brave dogs). We were upset by this but as The Lurcher grew, she started to chase them and so a pattern was set. They would still come into the utility room and sleep and eat there, so we at least knew they were safe.
Then, over a few weeks, they stopped coming into the utility room. It was summer, so we weren't hugely bothered but in September of last year,one of our across-the -road neighbours knocked on the door and asked if I knew who owned the black and ginger cats were that had arrived on her doorstep.
I explained the situation and she said they looked hungry, so she'd been feeding them. She'd just lost an old cat, so I asked if she was happy with the arrangement and she said she wasn't, and started complaining about the ginger one sitting n her windowsill. She said she doesn't let them inside but I've seen them on the inside windows of her house.
I apologised, and suggested she just not feed them, so they would came back to us for food. She said she didn't want to see them hungry so would continue ot feed them. We have a huge sack of Burns in the utility room, so I offered her that but she declined. I told her if she had any concerns about them she must tell me.
Over the last year, we've seen very little of either cat, but about a month ago she arrived on my doorstep saying she was thinking about not feeding them anymore. I said that was fine, but perhaps do it then before it gets really cold and I'll start putting out food at out front door to make sure they get something. She then muttered about how she didn't like to see them hungry, and again I offered to provide her with food.
She has just turned up on my doorstep saying she's not feeding them anymore and we'll have to do something about them. Confused
There is not much we can do really, just put out food for them and make sure they have somewhere warm to sleep. I don't think they will come inside again because of the dog :( but perhaps we can persuade them to come back into the utility room again.
I'm really pissed off because I think she should have stopped feeding them ages ago, not just before winter sets in.
I'm thinking of trying to rehome them if we can catch them, but it's not that they are unwanted, it's just they hate the dog .
AIBU to be annoyed?

OP posts:
snuffaluffagus · 23/11/2011 16:18

Well, my friend had a neighbour who fed her cat and then tried to nick it/pretend it was hers so I was all ready to be angry for you, but I think your case is rather different.

It seems that she doesn't want to feed them but doesn't want to stop which is unusual.. but at least she's telling you!

I feel a bit sorry for the cats being turfed out of their previously comfy home to be honest! Can you not look into rehoming them?

stinkyfluffycat · 23/11/2011 16:22

I'd try and catch them and re - home them. If they are (allegedly) not allowed in her house and won't come into yours then they would get very cold, even if she does keep feeding them.
Unless anyone has any magic tricks to get cats & dogs to make friends?

NinkyNonker · 23/11/2011 16:23

I feel sorry for the cats too!

SouthernandCross · 23/11/2011 16:29

I do too. And I wouldn't have got the puppy if I thought it was going to worry the cats so much. We had a stair gate on the stairs and kitchen, so the cats could always get away from The Lurcher.
But they have a warm utility room that they can enter without having to face the dogs, and there is also a shed that we can fix up for them if they would rather not enter the house.
I'm worried that they have got out of the habit of coming into the utility room now, whereas if she hadn't fed them they would have just kept coming home for food.
I might look into rehoming privately, all the rehoming centres are full at this time of year.

OP posts:
tigermoll · 23/11/2011 16:30

I concur, - you seem to have been a bit cavalier about these cats' welfare. You moved a dog into their home which chased them out, and then didn't see them 'for a few weeks' but weren't 'overly bothered'.

I think its a bit U to be pissed off at the neighbour for 'not stopping feeding them ages ago', - she was concerned about the cats welfare, made an effort to make you aware of the situation IN THE SUMMER, told you she wasn't happy, and you did nothing.

I think the cats would be better off being rehomed with someone who doesn't have a dog, tbh.

tunnelmaniac · 23/11/2011 16:49

Er - get rid of the bloody dog? No-one should keep an animal which is not controllable. Poor cats.

Kayano · 23/11/2011 16:53

Poor cats!!!

So they had to get unsettled from their home because you wanted a new dog? Even when it wasn't working just leave some food in conservatory and hope for the best?

Hmm

I think you have treated these animals so badly!!!

Whatmeworry · 23/11/2011 17:00

Shoot the dog and eat it for Xmas. Freeze leftovers for cats for 2012. Sorted..

paddypoopants · 23/11/2011 17:03

The poor cats- you are going to get slated on here and quite rightly so.
I think you need to do the right thing for the cats now which is catch them and phone the local Cat Protection League or similar and get them rehomed before it gets too cold.

MollyTheMole · 23/11/2011 17:10

gosh how blase are you about those poor cats?

"Over the last year, we've seen very little of either cat"

SouthernandCross · 23/11/2011 17:14

Fair enough, we will catch the cats and try and find homes for them. The local rescues are all full at this time of year, so well have to do it privately.
They were never cats that used to hang around inside the house anyhow, even before the puppy came along, so it wasn't unusual not to see them for days. I've had cats and dogs all my life, so I didn't think it would be a problem with a proper introduction but I've never had a hound before either. I don't believe The Lurcher is uncontrollable, she's actually pretty good but the urge for her to chase is so strong.
I do feel bad about this. :(

OP posts:
DooinMeCleanin · 23/11/2011 17:18

I sympathise. My cat currently won't come home due to hounds and a terrier. (long story)

I know he's about. I've just seen him. I plan on going to catch him and bring him back when DH gets home. He can go back upstairs where he is safe and warm and gets lots of hugs off the dc.

He's well looked after he just daren't walk through the door. Once he is in the dc's room he is fine.

Do you actually want your cats? If so there are ways and means of going about things without getting rid of either pet. You just need to find a dedicated safe room for the cats and go and get them.

SouthernandCross · 23/11/2011 17:30

Yes, we do want them, but they are obviously worried about the Lurcher. I have considered sticking them in DH's study with a litter tray but wonder if it's fair when they really like going outside. They would probably be better somewhere less busy as we have 4 kids as well as the 2 dogs. But if we can't find a home for them straight away, we are happy to keep them indoors away from the dog. They used to like our old dog and we'd often find them all curled up together.
I'm not an uncaring person, I knew they were being fed which is why I haven't tried to catch them before now.

OP posts:
KittyFane · 23/11/2011 18:49

It's strange how the cats in our area (counted 5) seem to congregate in our garden, sorry but we're really not a fan of cats and I find it really strange.
They lie on the bench, pad there way around, lounge about wherever they feel like (oh, and poo but let's not go there).
WHY???
We don't want them, we don't feed them. I wish they would clear off and we had a neighbour like you who would tempt them into her garden instead.

Dirtydishesmakemesad · 23/11/2011 19:28

one of our cats seemed to be getting fed elsewhere, he was putting on loads of weight and would refuse food at our house although he was in pretty much every night. Then he just vanished so im sort of hoping he has gone to live somewhere lovely :( rather than the alternative. Our other cat just goes and sits on the patio then comes in so she doesnt seem to be going anywhere. If she is not feeding them im guessing they will return to you just try and give them a safe space indoors from the dog?

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread