FunnysInTheGarden I know exactly what you mean about being 'dieted out' which is why I love what I'm doing now... saying that, I still have bad weeks when I self sabotage and gorge on stuff I know will undo a lot of good that I've done!
I put on weight easily, maintaining requires a little thought, and losing requires absolute concentration, planning, and a lot of cooking (and very little eating out) and its a PITA. I'm doing it VERY slowly. The key for me is staying for the group meetings (something I used to dispise) it seems to keep me on track. That may well not work for you is you hate talking food!
IF you are happy, then that is fine. If you are miserable, then your loved ones are going to talk.
The other thing here is that your DH has recently lost weight, he's buzzing, and when you're buzzing you want to share... so it may be more about him wanting to share his success with you, knowing you have issues than thinking you NEED to diet or lose weight?
I'm a 14/16 now. I am VERY happy. I want to lose more though.
Rather than finding a diet that works for you, I think you need to try and learn to deal with the other issue, that of people talking about food/weight etc, that's probably the harder of the two issues isn't it? You can't stop them. How you approach it and respond to it may be the key of dealing with it?
When my mum raises the subject, I either listen then change the subject or, if she's makes a quip about what I'm putting in my mouth I say 'you're looking tired mum...' she soons shuts up as aging is something that she hates.