follow up to an AIBU- I made the right decision about having my Mum down!

[lottielou39]

I'm 38 weeks pregnant and asked you guys a few days ago if I should have my Mother down next week until I give birth (potentially for a couple weeks minimum) despite having misgivings and not the best relationship with her.
Well, I definitely made the right decision NOT to have her down and listen to her constant negativity and passive aggressiveness
It's her birthday today and I phoned her 5 minutes ago to say Happy Birthday. I also sent her cards and a generous sized voucher from her favourite store.(which she always wants, she prefers vouchers to pressies).
The first thing she said was that I was late wishing her a Happy Birthday.
How very rude of me. I thought that phoning her up at some point throughout her day would be fine, but apparently not. Is it bad form not to phone first thing in the morning to wish a parent Happy Birthday?
She then went on being quite sarcastic, going on about my sisters and how they'd both phoned first thing and one was taking her out for lunch and then all of them (Mum and my younger sisters who live round the corner and visit her every single day, we live 250 miles away) taking her out for an evening meal- and I thought - hang on, I'm about to give birth and you're annoyed because I didn't phone at 9am on your special day. And it reminded me why I didn't really want her down here. So I made the right decision, for sure!

wow sounds like you made the right decision! good luck with the birth :)

Well done you!! Keep strong. Sounds like your eyes are open to how she tries to manipulate you.

Look after you and your baby.

You have made the right decision but please don't be upset. My mum also does this sort of thing and plays me off against my brother and sister. She can't wait to tell me of all the things they have done for her etc..

Just accept her for who she is. She is obviously a very needy woman and probably quite immature.

Big hugs and don't let her get to you xx

I agree, it's so childish. I don't know what I was thinking. I'm ever the optimist with my Mother, but she always ends up acting like a shit reverts to form.

well, she's just phoned me to thank me for my cards/voucher and was as nice as can be. (my sister admitted earlier that Mum had ranted to her about my 'late' phone call, just before midday, and why hadn't I called earlier, but sister thinks it was a mad as a box of frogs reaction too!)

Oh I have to say I get a bit miffed when birthday calls from close family are late in the day. I spend the whole day thinking "that bastard has forgotten, hasn't he?".

But it does sound like you made the right decision.

it was midday though! Is that late in the day?!!!

Sorry - no, midday is not late in the day. Didn't spot the time on your OP.

and the irritating thing is that she never ever phones me, despite the fact that I'm 38 weeks pregnant!