How good am I? I washed YOUR dishes, I cleaned YOUR bathroom, I hoovered and mopped YOUR floors!

[Bellatrix99]

Arrrrgggghhhhhh, if I hear these words from DH once more I am going to thump him!
Are these things not his as well? Why is everything in the house mine?
I hung up YOUR clothes?? When most probably the whole wash load was his and DS and I might have had one top in it.
And to top it off he does these things once every month and then I have to listen to it the rest of the month. He thinks fairies lift his dirty socks of the floor elves clean the kitchen every day.

YANBU

My other half does exactly the same, grrrrrrrrrr

And why is it that cleaning the kitchen is one chore for me but for DH it is many. He washes the dishes, he dries the dishes, he wipes the bench, he cleans the cooker, he brushes the floor. Whereas I clean the kitchen!

I just remembered how my ex always used to say it was his house and his car, but he'd done the washing up/cooking/hoovering for me

YANBU.

Me and DP have a completely different way of phrasing things. I'm currently 31 weeks pregnant and if I feel absolutely manky (which I still do sometimes) I'll ask 'Can you make THE tea'. If it is referred to again that night/the following day by him, he will say 'I made YOUR tea last night'. Oh, sorry DP, I could have sworn I saw you shovelling down a plateful as well, was I mistaken?

His other trick is to make an observation such as 'I should hoover tonight' and then promptly forget/not bother. I tried to leave it last time, I really did, but after two weeks our lovely cream carpet has disappeared under a thick coating of fluffy black dog hair so I dragged the Dyson around. Of course he came home as I was doing so and protested with 'I was going to do that!'.

YANBU! Am fuming on your behalf.

When I came home from hospital for DC3, DH was uncharacteristically helpful in the house and spent a day or two doing hoovering, washing and emptying the dishwasher. When he'd got fed up with the novelty, he again went back to sitting on his bum at the PC. When I said that the older 2 children needed tea, he went off on one saying "I've spent the last 2 days doing nothing but stuff for YOU, the least you can do is make your own children some tea". Needless to say I had rather a lot to say about that!!

He does that every so often, makes a nasty, sexist, sweeping statement, then spends the next few months trying to "make up" for saying it.

Hex

Good for you not letting him get away with that.

If there is washing to be done at weekends hardly any of it is mine but it's always, "Come on DC let's help Mummy with her washing" so I stand and stare at the lone pair of socks, hang them up, remind that I have bought, replaced, picked up all the other clothes, sorted them, ensured that washing powder has been bought, put them all in the machine in good time for work and schools and have also managed to wash curtains, towels, coats and other things. It is slowly sinking in.

Just do it all back to him, broken down into every tiny little chore just like he does. Especially when he tells you the 5 things he's done for you, tell him the 20 things that you have done for him

Hopefully he'll realise that anything he can do you can do better.

Once he is beginning to understand it's time to then point out that he's not doing it for you but for 'the family' as are you.

My dh is pretty good at doing things BUT only when the fact they need doing is either pointed out or it gets so bad that he has to say eat out of his hands because there are no clean dishes. Its not a huge problem to point things out for him to do although he does get a hopeful look as though he is expecting praise. I dont think he calls the chores mine he just says oh "i did the dishwasher" - followed by a hopeful look.

OP if you and he were in the process of splitting up he would soon change his tune. I bet you it would then be HIS bathroom and HIS floors.

He sounds like he needs a chufty badge

My DP does this ALL THE CHUFFING TIME. It drives me mental.

"Can I have MY computer back?!" - firstly, it isn't "yours" but "ours", and I've been on it for 5 minutes to check Mumsnet, whilst you've had it for 5 sodding hours playing Minecraft!

"When are you doing MY bedroom?" - when I have time, you selfish arse! And it's OURS! DO IT YOURSELF!