I am nearly 40, still young i know. my sex drive is on the decline. dh has never had a high drive. Also I am the only one getting up early with the kids, doing any childcare. On top of that we dont connect for weeks and weeks at a time.
After a night of drinks (4 wines), followed by a coffee, followed by my parents lingering on after babysitting for nearly an hour, we were finally alone by midnight. within minutes he asked for some nooky. I said that it was hard to jump straight in, that we needed to connect first (meaning a kiss and a cuddle, deep down i meant generally) . and he hasnt really spoken to me much since. he says he will never ask again. I hate that it is only ever on offer late at night after drinks, there is nothing energetic which appeals to me once the dc's are asleep. I dont think i have ever refused before, but i thinking hes reading way too much into it. like it is the end of something. should i have just got on with it? after all it doesnt happen much.