AIBU to think that we are a nation of low intolerance

[scuzy]

reading threads here and in general on boards i am "furious and shocked" ... ok maybe not that but am tired of reading people's intolerance of complete strangers ... such as complaining of basic manners to eating habits to asking simple polite favours to lift/door etiquette etc.... i mean if you are polite and teach your kids same then thats your job done! why lose sleep or get so angry at the way some random stranger behaves that doesnt impact your life. so the guy ahead of you didnt hold the door, so the person next to you eats with their mouth open, so someone pushed their way infront of you onto bus, so someone with no kids parked in a P&C space. its on them! its life! its not worth the energy and upset. life is short use their ignorance to know your a better person.

sigh

Erm if we're "low intolerance", then we are tolerant?

Oh and, YANBU

yes your right ... typo .... meant high intolerance. my bad!

Lol!!

Because, unfortunately, the majority of people nowadays don't teach their children basic manners. The amount of times I've seen a child biting, kicking, having a tantrum, swearing etc. and the parents have just sat by and done nothing or justified it with "kids will be kids". I may only be 21, but I was never like that as a child and if I were to ever misbehave in such a manner my Nan would make sure I never did it again!

One memorable occasion was when I was on work experience, and one little boy of 6 attacked a boy of 5. It was entirely unprovoked and completely vicious. He even picked up a chair and hit the poor boy with it. When I asked him why he told me what his father had told him. Which was if the child didn't like anyone, or thought they were beneath him, he could do whatever he liked and if they didn't like it they could shut the f**k up.

I was agog. And then when the father turned up and basically told me exactly the same thing - that I was not to discipline his son for "doing what comes naturally" - I almost cried with disbelief. Absolutely shocking.

And yes, that's true. However I'm sure I'll get the sceptics whining about how it couldn't possibly be accurate and how I'm just making it all up for effect.

But anyway - people seem to not want the responsibility of teaching their children in the proper manner, either because it's too difficult or because they are instilling the wrong type of value. And when those children grow up, they'll do exactly the same to their children. It's a vicious circle but it's not one we can do much about.

Oh, and YANBU.

StealthPenguin while i see your point I dont mean this thread to be aimed at just kids. i think people today are more concerned with what the neighbour is doing or complete strangers they forget about home. i mean if people looked after themselves and their own family and home more then being judgemental and commenting and watching strangers i reckon the world would definately be a better place.

I know, I kind of went off on a slant.... sorry about that

But, generally speaking, the point still sort of stands. If people don't teach their children good values, then they'll grow up to be fucking despicable adults. And then they'll procreate, and churn out fucking despicable children. And so the loop continues...

And with everyone being concerned about everyone else - that's just human nature! People want to know what others are doing as a natural curiosity. And if someone is, for example, walking down the street screaming obscenities into a mobile phone like you, you complete tosser from next door who then acknowledged me and my child with a "he's a fucking gorgeous baby. How'd you manage that out your cunt?" then it's very hard to ignore them.

I disagree. Reading the Mumsnet boards gives you a rather skewed perspective. A lot of people come on here to complain but very rarely will anyone post a thread praising good manners or whatever. People come on here to vent!

As for the 'people nowadays' not teaching their children manners, do you think there was a golden age of manners? The satirist Juvenal who lived during the first century (I think!) wrote about how young people nowadays had no respect, politicians were more dishonest etc etc. Be careful otherwise you'll end up being one of those irritating people who say 'oooh in my day'! :)

the thing is, we're not of low tolerance, but we like to complain about stuff.

that's a completely different thing.

So, we complain behind closed doors, but we generally live and let live.

Having lived in over 15 locations around the UK, I would say it very much depends on where you live and the specific area.
I now live in a place of high tolerance and where eccentricity is accepted with few negative remarks either about dress, job perspectives or lifestyle choices.
Had either of my children lived in some of the other areas I survived in as a child, they would probably have been bullied and attacked. Which is one of the reasons I really like where I live now. They have a level of freedom that they cherish.
UK as a whole is a tolerant society and usually accommodates difference well in relation to many other countries' attitudes.

We are indeed a society of grumblers and complainers rather than mob riots and necklacing.

I agree with Down that UK is tolerant towards difference.

But you are right about the small things. I think British people don't like confrontation, so they end up 'boiling' inside them. In my home country you just say 'oi hold the door/lift'. I cant imagine a Spanish person 'fuming' after the event and writting about this on forums days after.

Some people pay too much attention to detail and sweat the small things.

It's good to have a good old moan sometimes though.
That's what AIBU is for surely.
And noisy eaters really irritate me