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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think that if I want to send my DC to the outstanding school in the next village then I bloody well can??

61 replies

MumblingAndBloodyRagDoll · 11/11/2011 16:28

My local school is very full...its ok but not great and when it came time to send DD1 there, she couldn't get in anyway (BIG catchment)...we were offered a very bad alternative 3 miles away (we did visit and hated it) and so sent her to a private prep over the road....(struggled to pay for this and luckily got a bursary) and put her name down at the local school, plus 2 others in neighbouring villages both of which are less than 2 miles away.

We were offered a place for her this year at an outstanding school we were on the list for and we duly sent her and she has settled in very well. We also registered our youngest at the preschool which is linked.

We have met about 20 other people who live in our village that go to our new school in the neighbouring village...so it's not ALL local kids.

Waiting outside preschoool for DC2 today I mentioned something to one Mum about an event happening at the school and another Mum immediately butted in said, "Oh it's terrible...there are something like 20 siblings coming into reception this year...so locals with one child can't get in." to her friend loudly.

She was obviously having a go....I can't help that we couldn't get in more locally can I?? I totally ignored her and carried on my conversation whlst she informed all the new Mums local and not...that the places are given to siblings before locals.

We only live a mile and a half away ffs and there are no other schools nearby offering us a place! We couldn't afford prep any more even with a bursary...are we in the wrong? I had hoped there wouldn't be any ill feeling....

OP posts:

CardyMow · 11/11/2011 21:12

She would have HATED this years' Reception year at my DS's school then. Out of a year group of 60...45 were siblings. Which left only 15 places for anyone else! There are a LOT of people whose oldest dc are now having to travel through the middle of a town, up to 5 miles, to get their DC1 to school because of it!!

And I can see both sides POV - It is not possible to be on two places at once, no spaces in after-school club, both dc needing picked up at once - so impossible to cope with dc on different schools, BUT equally, it is unfair that people end up travelling 5+ miles to get their first dc into school.

KouklaMoo · 11/11/2011 21:18

Huntycat, no word of a lie, the school I referred to in my last post had 22 siblings one year, and an intake of 30. (sorry to do admission-top-trumps there). The LEA made the school increase the intake to 45 the next year because there were so many complaints. School was not happy.

CardyMow · 11/11/2011 22:06

It is a very rare school year that has so many siblings though. Apparently the next school year that will have anywhere near as many siblings will be the year DS3 starts Reception - but because the current bulge year will have left, the school will be able to take a year group of 90 again that year. And as far as the school can make out...there will be somewhere in the region of 62 siblings that year (!) - so it is sheer good luck that the bulge year will be leaving in the July, or even 2 siblings would not get in!

That's a funny query WRT admissions - if siblings is the highest priority, but there are more siblings than places in that school year - how do the LEA 'choose' which siblings get to attend the school and which don't? Is it done on distance from the school gates, or drawn out of a hat? I don't know because I have never come across that situation, but I would imagone it is possible.

Ghoulwithadragontattoo · 11/11/2011 22:28

It depends but usually the siblings would be ranked by distance.

Ghoulwithadragontattoo · 11/11/2011 22:32

KouklaMoo - 22/30 is a slightly lower ratio than 45/60 - Hunty would have (just) beaten your hand at Top Trumps!

MillyR · 11/11/2011 22:34

DS was denied a local school place because of siblings from out of catchment taking precedence. I have no car and it has been difficult, but I can't see what the solution is. I think it is pretty ridiculous that people go to schools other than their local primary because of tiny differences in league table position and fluctuations in reputations, but what can actually be done about it?

I can't see that it is your fault that your child couldn't attend their local school.

KouklaMoo · 11/11/2011 22:37

One of my darkest admission 'fears' is that there would be more siblings than places. In our school it would be decided on distance - ie the nearest siblings get in. Its never happened before here - but I can't imagine a situation where a whole school year was siblings only! The villagers would be up in arms.

KouklaMoo · 11/11/2011 22:39

Ghoul OMG - maths fail!

CardyMow · 11/11/2011 22:57

See, if it wasn't for the fact that the school will have the ABILITY to take a bulge class in Reception in the September 2014 intake - they would have more siblings than places as there are 62 siblings! And they are ALL within a mile and a half of the school!

Ghoulwithadragontattoo · 11/11/2011 22:59

CardyMow · 11/11/2011 23:00

And my DS3 won't even count as one of those siblings, as DS2 will start Y7 when DS3 starts Reception...there are at least 2/3 others who have had all of their older dc go through this school whose youngest dc may not get a place if the school doesn't take a bulge class. It's just sheer good luck that the school will be able to take 90 that year as DS2's bulge year of 90 will be leaving in the July!

workshy · 11/11/2011 23:11

ok currently feeling very lucky that there are 5 primary schools wihin easy walking distance of me -none of which are bad schools

people always moan about admissions policy

where I live it currently runs

'looked after children' (and yes there have been appeals on that basis)
siblings of children already in the area
distance

can't imagine sending my 2 to different schools, shool has a massive impact on children and I'm striving to give them the same oportunities in life and sending them to different schools doesn't support this

I can see the problem if your next nearest school is 5 miles away but if you say there are 2 neighbouring villages with schools less than 2 miles away, then I would pressume the same would be true for her?

besides which, schools haven't been allocated yet so why is she moaning????

HexagonalQueenOfTheSummer · 11/11/2011 23:18

I would have pulled her up on what she said. She was being blatently rude. I know school applications bring out the worst in lots of parents but it's certainly not your fault that you were allocated the school. If she has an issue she should be taking it up with the LEA, not making digs at you about it.

CustardCake · 11/11/2011 23:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KouklaMoo · 11/11/2011 23:35

Custard, the one thing we can't do before we get dd's sibling place is move house. Our LEA have a '2 mile rule' in place - if you move house and it's further than 2 miles from the school, you lose your sibling rights. Regardless of how near you are to the school to start with.

So, we live 5 miles from the school (we are a rural-ish area) we could potentially move nearer to the school and still lose dd's place. I used to wonder how the LEA could possibly enforce this, until one woman didn't get her place having moved house. So they do investigate sibling rights quite thoroughly here.

We won't be moving that's for sure!

KouklaMoo · 11/11/2011 23:36

Course, there's nothing stop parents from moving house once the sibling has started school.

Oggy · 11/11/2011 23:50

The whole siblings vs local kids thing is a bloody nightmare for everyone.

Of course it is daft and inconvenient for a local child to have to go miles for a school when s/he has one on her doorstep, however it is also daft and inconvenient (borderin gon impossible depending on school start and finish times) for a parent to get 2 kids to 2 different schools and collect them at the same time.

No one is more right than the other, it's impossible to please everyone on this.

Worth bearing in mind that schools that have this situation almost certainly depend upon the out of town children in order to stay open due to not enough local children each year and local parents should probably consider whether they would even have a local school without the support of out of towners using that school.

GrimmaTheNome · 11/11/2011 23:53

If you live in the countryside, a mile and a half is local.

CointreauVersial · 11/11/2011 23:58

Yeah, Grimma, I was just thinking that.

We are four miles away from our "local" school.

OP, just smile serenely and ignore.

flyingspaghettimonster · 12/11/2011 02:09

Village schools can be so petty and unpleasant anyhow... just ignore the busybody cowbag. I remember how myself and 4 other classmates were bullied and outcast by our teacher because we 'thought ourselves too good' for the local catchment secondary school, so had applied and been accepted to a school with a better reputation. For a whole year she actively encouraged the other kids to ignore us and segregated us in lessons. Village parents were also very cliquey and downright rude at times. Makes me so glad to have moved away from all that nastiness and that my own kids go to a school where drama is kept to a discreet minimum.

Original poster

MumblingAndBloodyRagDoll · 12/11/2011 09:47

Thanks Oggy and Grimma it does FEEL local iyswim....I walked back yesterday the "long" way through the fields and woods and it still took only half an hour going slow....the other way is by road and takes 7 minues. Thats hardly non-local is it? They all end up at the same High School anyway!

Sphagetti that teacher sounds awful! In general the other parents and villgers are lovely to me...no one else has said anything....

OP posts:

GrimmaTheNome · 12/11/2011 09:53

FSM, how awful - if she had an axe to grind, she shouldn't have taken it out on pupils.

Andrewofgg · 12/11/2011 11:25

Siblings-first is just common sense. It reduces school-running.

And I speak as one who went to single-sex schools and only had a sister, and myself only had a DS, so I have no axe to grind.

LeQueen · 12/11/2011 14:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

MumblingAndBloodyRagDoll · 12/11/2011 14:32

I don't feel guilty either LeQeen....I could have used the money I spent on Prep to move into the village but didn't feel the desperation...so we stayed put. We were happy to use the local school but that didn't happen.

As it stands it's not ALL perfect for us this way....we don't know hardly any local kids now....it's not a real hardship but it's certainly not ideal.

OP posts:

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