To MAKE DH put the kids to bed tonght?

[MumblingAndBloodyRagDoll]

I simply can't bear it anymore. He has to take his turn.

We have 2 DDs and we both work. Full time. The DDs share a room and I do the whole story and getting ready thing...tonight I couldn/t face it and told hm and the that I wasn't doing it and Dh was.

He does do their baths etc but I do the rest and they are both kicking off up there and DH is bumbling about and not knowing what to do and they're being cheeky and trying all kinds of tricks.

The three year old is howling for me and the 7 year old is shrieking that she wants to read and not have lights off.

I am SICK of doing it evey night. I have to ead rumpteen stories and then sit and kiss DD2 for ages....it takes me about 45 minutes every night and I GIVE UP!¬
I DONT WANT TO READ FECKING MAISIE MOUSE AGAIN! EVER!!!!!

DH has been down once to say "DD1 wants to read her book....it's not fair that the light has to go off now."

I told him it IS fair as she's only 7 and has to get up in the morning! She can't wake up if she doesn't get at least 12 hours. HELP AIBU to stick to my guns or do I go up there and fix it all?

no you are not

you've got to get yourself somewhere where you can't hear them

preferably leave the house
do not go up

if you can hear them you just sit there going ' oh for FUCK'S SAKE just bloody get on with it'

YANBU. He should be able to put his own DCs to bed and the only way to get better at it is by practising. If you go and fix it he and they will never learn.

I can't stand doing two children together, I always end up frazzled and shouting. I would leave him to it tonight, as you'll only stomp up and shout 'see, can't you do anything?' and then think of some ways to make bedtimes easier later on. I usually let one fall asleep in another bed and then lift them in later. I would also limit the stories to one each. Full stop. And lights out at 8 or whenever you set so it's not a negotiation every night. This seems a lot easier than trying to get a three year old and a seven year old to bed at the same time point, they don't really have the same needs, I don't think.

Having said that, I've had times it has lurched out of control with coming down for water/food/to spoil my evening, so I'm not saying I always have it cracked!

yanbu
can you go out to a cafe or library? or fetch a takeaway?

have you succumbed?

Maybe sort out tonight, but next time explain clearly what's going to happen and then go out.
They'll soon develop their own ways of doing things. :)

They've only just begun to share so it's all a bit tits up....we need to ger the little one in first suppose.

Im just so knackered! Couln't face any of it.

Does DD1 not have enough pocket money for a torch?

YABU to wait.

ARRGGH YANBU

No sucumbation here seals ! (sure that's not a word!) I have a glass of wine & I never even drink!

Something has gone boing in me...rebel has appeared for first time in 7 years!

She has torch but she needs to be asleep by 8ish and she takes a while to chill....if I let her read now...she will stll take a while to fall asleep.

I need to get her a dim wall light methinks.

you did it

bedtime is just pants. 'quality time' it ain't.
it's a dog eat dog world up there

I think its only fair to give the bigger one some priviledge over the little one, and i think a little bedside reading light would be perfect. The little one could have a little radio. It might sound old fashioned, but before mine were old enough to read they'd listen to 'ballet music' aka classic fm, v quietly which would lul them to sleep.
Bedtime routine doesnt have to be a battle!

I do think it's reasonable for the seven year old to have some wind-down time, perhaps going to bed at 7 and lights out at 8, with a small light although if it's bright enough for reading, it may disturb the three year old.

Mine only share on hols and at grandparents (over a month of the year) and I let the younger go in the big bed (as easier to carry later), and do a late night weestop, carrying them in after the big one has gone to bed. That way you are dealing with the three year old stories whilst the seven year old is having a bit of big girl time on her own and it all stops by eight, which is as good as it ever gets in our house.

My ds has one of those nightlights that double as a torch, good for reading in bed without being too bright. Also agree with whoever said get the youngest one in bed first, much easier to do seperately.

YANBU. I know what you mean- some nights I just cannot be arsed to read whatever story and then give DD a backrub and do the whole night-night palaver thing. Sounds terrible to say- I love DD to bits but it's tedious as hell more often than not at the moment. And I hate it most when I've been up early with her and had her all day on my own, so by 8pm I am DONE.

DH NEVER volunteers and I don't push it because she's his DSD so ultimately I feel it's up to me. But his DS is on the way in about 6 weeks and oooooh, things are going to change. :O

One story. ONE! Only ever read one, 5 min cuddle after and then go. Sounds like you are playing along with their whims.

Agree with torch. Mine have those.

Bedtime is bedtime in my house. Not story time, singing time or anything else. Hug, kiss and off:o Sounds more clinical than it is, but we read at other times of the day and singing is a pretty constant thing for some obscure reason. Adopt the no-frills LMF method for two kids into bed in three minutes flat

I think I would have to have myself committed if I had to go through the whole 45 minute routine like that every night, so you are not unreasonable at all Mumbling

Rule one: take it in turns (dd loves us both to read to her, as we like to read different kinds of books)
Rule two: decide how many stories/pages you are going to read now and stick to it (I read 1 chapter to dd now, used to be 2 stories when they were short)
Rule three: if you hate reading a particular book, don't read it, get your dh to read it instead (I cannot read any Dr Seuss or Enid Blyton, they make me want to strangle things)
Rule four: enjoy, all too soon they grow up and don't want it anymore (though dd is nearly 10 and showing no signs of wanting us to stop)