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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to feel bad that my children don't play out?

48 replies

jackiejones · 05/11/2011 12:56

I read on here all the time about mntter's children playing out and know lots of people in RL who's children 'playout'. My older two are 10 and 7, we live on a busy road. They would be fine with the road but there is actually no where for them to play, except for biking up and down the road (they soon get bored).

Are the destined to be obese? Am I going to be taking them out to the park etc for years to come?

OP posts:
BarbarianMum · 05/11/2011 13:03

They are not destined to be obese no, but I think it does put the onus on you do find them outlets for physical activity - taking them to the park, swimming, encouraging participation in sport etc.

How close is the nearest park? Ours is 1/2 mile off so only 10+ go down there with friends.

It's a pain, isn't it? Sad Our road is safe enough for playing out from 7/8 but mine are younger than that, so I am in your position too (though with a reprieve in sight).

Original poster
jackiejones · 05/11/2011 13:04

Parks probably only half a mile away but no one to go there with. I wouldn't let my 7 year old go anyway.

OP posts:
marriedinwhite · 05/11/2011 13:14

Mine never played out. They are not obese. We loved the park when they were little. You might have to join a sports club.

duckdodgers · 05/11/2011 13:14

I thankfully live in a street where it is normal to see children playing outside, and can let my DS whos 9 play outside, and has been doing for years now. Why cant you let your DC go to the park?

Original poster
jackiejones · 05/11/2011 13:33

I would let my 10 year old with somone else but not my 7 year old. the park is tucked away so wouldn't feel safe unless with someone. i think its too far for my 7 year old.

OP posts:
worraliberty · 05/11/2011 13:36

I agree with Barbarian the onus is definitely on you to make sure they exercise every day then.

And even if they do get bored going up and down the road on their bikes, you could encourage them to do so even for half an hour on the days you can't take them swimming and to the park etc.

duckdodgers · 05/11/2011 14:43

Thats a shame so I guess it means you have to take them then?

Original poster
jackiejones · 05/11/2011 14:54

Yes I take them sometimes. They have been swimming this morning with their dad. Older daughter does netball, rugby, horseriding. Younger one is very bouncy Hmm but thinking about it her clubs are more music based. yes I should shove them out the door encourage them to go biking.

OP posts:
thisisyesterday · 05/11/2011 14:57

do you have a garden?

FootprintsOnTheMoon · 05/11/2011 14:59

Do you run walk to school?

Original poster
jackiejones · 05/11/2011 14:59

Yes. They go out there sometimes, they again are not keen.

OP posts:
Original poster
jackiejones · 05/11/2011 15:00

No we don't walk to school at the moment because Im' lazy and its 20 mintues each way am planning to start.

OP posts:
AnotherEmptyNest · 05/11/2011 15:02

Are there any daytime (for the holidays) or evening clubs like Scouts or Cubs or Boys' / Girls' Brigade. They often have active things to do.

Is there a local community centre where there are things they could do?

Or are any neighbours' children in the same boat and you could liaise about a 'park run'.

Original poster
jackiejones · 05/11/2011 15:05

There aren't many children in the immediate area. However I will asking DD's friend's mum who lives a short walk away if we can arrange a park outing.

OP posts:
thisisyesterday · 05/11/2011 15:05

if you can fit a climbing frame/trampoline out there that might encourage them out more often? or football goals?

tbh though I don't think it hurts a child not to go out every single day as long as on the other days they are getting plenty of exercise.

tobyrat · 05/11/2011 15:06

A garden is perfectly fine for playing out.

Also my children make a good job of running around indoors! (we don't have much furniture)

thisisyesterday · 05/11/2011 15:07

walking to school is a good idea. or cycling if it's safe, that would get you there quicker too

Original poster
jackiejones · 05/11/2011 15:07

We have a huge trampoline, what else can i get for a 7 and 10 year old? Climbing frame?

OP posts:
noonar · 05/11/2011 15:08

we used to live on a really busy road.
we now live in a cul de sac.
our quality of life is v different in terms of dc playing out and sense of community, as the geography is more conducive to neighbours loitering 'out front'. its one of the reasons we moved, tbh, so i do sympathise.

are you renting?

your dc will be fine, you just have to try a bit harder, which you seem to be doing Smile

my dc, on the other hand, cannot walk to school alone due to distance from school. in fact, we usually drive. but then they do play out a lot. so... in my exp, there are often pros/ cons with different locations.

Original poster
jackiejones · 05/11/2011 15:09

Yes were renting. Yep must try harder I think. Smile

OP posts:
worraliberty · 05/11/2011 15:15

The thing is, I think some parents don't actually realise just how much energy kids should be burning.

Although my boys are active and they play out, whenever we go on a caravan holiday for example, they just don't stop moving all day when they have a bit more freedom. This makes me realise just how much energy they'd burn at home if they had the same sort of freedom.

Long walks, playing on the beach all day, trip to the pier, walk back to the caravan, playing hide n seek round the vans (while I rest!) and then they still want a swim before we go out for the evening.

Looking back on my childhood (I'm 42) I went straight to the park on my bike every day after school or played in the street/garden. Every weekend and all holidays, were spent outdoors.

I'm quite sure my mum was worried about strangers/cars/gangs in the park and all the things we worry about now....except there were no mobile phones in those days.

I really think some kids don't get enough exercise nowadays and as parents, if we decide to curtail their freedom...we should definitely be taking them to the park/pool/even sitting out in the street watching them play in the winter if they're not allowed out alone.

worraliberty · 05/11/2011 15:16

Even the walk to school OP...you say it's only 20 mins either way and yet you don't walk them.

Why? Shock

My Primary school was way further than that and my Mum didn't have the luxury of a car (thankfully)

Original poster
jackiejones · 05/11/2011 15:19

As I said worra because I' lazy but am intending to try and do it. 3 kids getting out the door 20 mintues earlier, one climbing out of her buggy is also putting me off.

OP posts:
thisisyesterday · 05/11/2011 15:21

to be fair we don';t know what the OP's route to school is like.
my friend only lives about 15-20 mins away from school, but lives on an incredibly busy road with a 40mph speed limit and no pavement so she simply can't safely get her 3 kids to school and has to drive :(

plus the OP may work and drop the kids off on her way?

there are loads of reasons why people don;t do school runs even though they are short

thisisyesterday · 05/11/2011 15:22

or she might just be lazy! lol x-poted OP!