To think £150 is a LOT of money?

[SacreLao]

Right a Christmas thread.

I spend £150 each on my children (aged 7 and 9 years old) for Christmas, this to me is a lot of money, it has been slowly raised as they get older and things cost more.

My daughter (9 years old) is getting a netbook this year as she now does a lot of school work that involves using the internet.

I managed to pick one up second hand for £100 and was chatting to a friend saying I am now going to get her lots of small cheap presents to make it look a bit more in her pile of presents as so much of the budget has gone on one present.

She thought £150 was not enough for a 9 year old and that my daughter would not be happy with only having a few presents due to the expensive netbook whereas my 7 year old son will have a lot more presents as his are all cheaper (lego, action figures etc.)

AIBU to think that

a) £150 is a lot of money for a child and they don't need anymore than that?

b) A 9 year old is old enough to understand that some presents cost more money so they are bound to have less in volume?

Fair enough apocalypse. But do you think that you don't know any of them well enough to know that they would say 'but dear lord that is not enough!'.

And if they did say 'but my word that is wrong' would you then doubt in your own mind that you had made sensible decisions about your Christmas spending?

It's just this endless assessing and reassessing of how much altogether, how much on each, how much is too much, how much pils should spend...

I don't understand how so many people get into so many conversations about the nitty gritty of what they are spending.
That's all

YANBU on either count.

Amount of money spent is all relative, depends on family's income and outgoings, and whether dcs get things throughout year or only xmas and Birthdays.

What is your friend going to buy her DD next year??

Agree Pagwatch.

Surely that's part of being an adult? You assess your financial situation and your child's needs and spend accordingly?

All this my friend is saying it's not enough makes you sound about 13 yo.

Sorry OP...

You spend what you think is reasonable and you can afford. I don't understand spending x amount on each child - the overall feel of the presents should be equal not the amount, and if you're picking up stuff second hand it throws that equation anyway.

A three year old (for example) is very unlikely to want/need things that are as expensive as those an 8 year old wants/needs, and if you tried to match amounts you'd swamp the pre-schooler with more than it's bodyweight of brightly coloured plastic. And one year a child might need a new bike, the next it's sibling might need eg a notebook. The health and homework benefits make them more than just presents IMO, so I'd allow extra for them.

I saw the thread the other day about the Littlewoods advert and the poster being annoyed that it suggested Santra didn't bring all the presents. I was stunned. That advert really annoyed me. Not because of the Santa stuff, because it was a musical guilt trip designed to push mothers into spending money they don't have on presents because they can pay it back in installments. And IMO it was designed to tap into older children/teens pester power. That and the return of the Disney ad wankery when people are struggling to pay their billls is offensive. And I know we all have different incomes and outgoings, but is anyone unaffected by the way the economy is and rising fuel and food prices?

Santra is Santa's cousin.

£150 is a lot of money op and I think what you bought your DC sounds fine. We spend between £150-200 per child each year. DD is getting a new bed this year which we had thought would take a big chunk of the budget and DD was aware that she wouldn't be getting many other pressies. However we have managed to find one second hand for a fraction of what we were going to spend so I'm pleased we can treat DD to a bit more. DS is 4 and we can't even find £200 worth of stuff to get him so will prob be spending closer to £150 mark. We've always spent a bit more on them as we have sensible GPs who don't go overboard and everyone else doesn't really go to town on pressies either so it makes for a nice manageable amount on xmas day. DCs birthday budget has always been £50.

Completly soandsosmummy.

Last year DD got an Ipod Touch, chocolate, an outfit and a book, cost over £250.

DS1 got a DSi and game, outfit, a book, chocolate and Lego, cost under £200,

DS2 got a baby gym, and a pack of vests cost under £50.

DS2 got the biggest presents, DD got the most value, but none of them cared because they all got something they really wanted

That's the other thing Oneofthosedays, some people don't count things like beds as presents and some would count essential clothes as presents. As long as the children feel that they're being treated equally I don't think amounts matter.

I haven't got a budget, as such, but if I did £150 would be at the very tippety top of it.

I also never speak to friends about money

If that is your budget then there is nothing wrong with that x

Agree with the quality of presents, not quantity, nothing worse than having a load of tat thats never played with.
I would get your dd a printer and some paper as well OP- I picked a printer up for my dd for less than £25 in Arhos and its fab for what she needs it for.
It will "bulk out" the presents if thats what you are concious of, but also be practical

Where will it all end?

On a separate, but related issue, I went to Westfield last weekend (to Lakeland, so that's alright, before you say anything), and it actually made me feel a bit sick.

What's the point of all this stuff. Girls with bags and bags of Primark clothes, screaming children. Gloomy, hot, noisy. We should all just go for a walk outside

£150 is plenty. It's more than I spend on Christmas for both boys put together and while we're not exactly loaded, we're not strapped for cash, either. YANBU and your friend should MHOB.

To OP, thanks for asking the question, I still have no idea what is really appropriate.
But I'm getting there.

£150 is more than sufficient! I put £10 aside each month for the elder 2 (12 and 14) and £5 for the 4 year old (although this will be increased as he actually starts wanting/needing anything) - £120 each and £60 which I think is tons, given that they also get money and presents from other relatives.

Tell your friend that if she doesn't feel it's enough she can make up the difference - and while she's at it stick in something for you

Exactly Puffin, obviously if her bed broke we would have to buy a new one which wouldn't be a present. But as it's a 'fun' bed (high sleeper, she loves sleeping on top bunk when we go on holiday) she was really excited about it. My friend decorated both DCs rooms one year, and got all matching accessories etc for their main present, they were chuffed to bits. I'd far rather there be quality over quantity as I am a ruthless anti-clutterer and can't stand mounds of plastic or cheap shite (eyes up DDs bloody go go hamsters and stupid tunnels/rooms they endlessly roll round). I've just got to get over my must-spend-equal-amounts-on-the-children train of thought!

All the consumerism does make me nostalgic for the smell of chestnuts roasting and children finding coals to make the eyes of snowmen and hanging stockings with a present or two and a tangerine in the bottom. Not that I have experience of any of that. It's just that all the gluttony and waste has made me long for something simple and plain. I don't think it ever really existed. Christmas was always about excess (for those who could afford it), it's just that we have so much nowadays that it's hard to create that same sense of plenty without going nuts.

blooming heck is that what Christmas costs these days? I've always gone with approx £30 per person and as little as possible for baby and toddler. Suspect I'm in for a shock in a few years time!

£150 sounds plenty to me. I agree it's none of your friend's business either way though. If you feel happy that you've spent a sensible amount, and your DD is happy that she's got the present she wanted, why does anyone else's opinion matter?

You arent the only person not buying expensive techy gifts OP, I assure you!

My dc's (8 and 3) are getting lots of bits (dvds, books, puzzles) and 1 larger gift each.

I guess I have spent £100 on ds2 and a bit more on ds1 as what he wants is more expensive and at 3 ds2 will probably spend most of his time building a den out of the wrapping paper again