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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to have the dummy fairy coming already?

46 replies

Flojo1979 · 04/11/2011 13:21

I am a no nonsense style parent. And decided earlier in the week that the dummy fairy was coming on friday night (tonight) since its wkend, incase i get disturbed sleep etc.
My mother however thinks I'm cruel and shes only a baby and its too soon.
My DD is 3 in 3 wks time, she only has her dummy at night hence my mum saying its doing no harm let her keep it. Whereas i think it'll be better for her teeth just to take it off her (via the fairy!) and let her cry it out for a couple of nights then she'll be fine. She still has cot side on as she has shown no interest in climbing and its getting to point where i think its best to take side off but it'd be wiser to take dummy off her while shes contained in her cot and cant bed hop all night.
AIBU?

OP posts:

Hadeda · 04/11/2011 14:06

Priceless - "mummy has eaten my pram"!!!

WanderingSheep · 04/11/2011 14:15

DressDownFriday my sister is trying to do that sort of thing with my nephew! My DD2 is 8 months old so she keeps trying to persuade him that my baby needs his dummies as they are for babies and he's a big boy. She's told him that DD2 will give him a present in return but he refuses!

OP if she's been preparing to give up the dummy then she'll be fine. She probably won't want to suck her thumb as it won't feel the same. My DD1 gave up her dummy when she was 2 (it was me who was reluctant to make her give it up as I thought we'd have tears and tantrums and sleepless nights and I didn't want to ruin the fact that she was a good sleeper) we just couldn't find it one night so she went to bed without it! We had no issues about it since! Hope the same goes for you, let us know how it goes

ItchyChin · 04/11/2011 14:18

YANBU! I did the same at 2.5 after trying the 'no trauma' cutting the teat down... she found a way to suck on 0.5mm of teat and ended up buying new ones!! We did Dummy Fairy and put them in a pretty bag on the xmas tree and she was fine... until bedtime. Then she was hideous (disclaimer she is the most stubborn child in the land) and it spelt the end of daytime naps and the arrival of earlier waking (but at least I wasn't getting up in the night to try and find the dummies... and the 2 back up dummies - she had to hold 2 and suck one... quite a habit but only at night ;)

Original poster

Flojo1979 · 04/11/2011 17:02

No my DD is def the most stubborn in the land! alot more 'spirited' than DC1. Theres alot to be said for second child syndrome!
I told her they were for baby charlie and i got "no he cant, his mum can buy his at shop" but atm shes quite settled and happy about the idea of the 'dodi tooth fairy' as she calls it is comes from the sky and i've just found out shes coming with father xmas to bring her a present!
fingers crossed!

OP posts:

Original poster

Flojo1979 · 04/11/2011 20:24

Well shes fast asleep without so much as a peep, but whether she'll be the same when she wakes for her nightly singsong at 1am remains to be seen!

OP posts:

ItchyChin · 04/11/2011 20:31

Well done and fingers crossed for later!

(DD is DC1 and only... have often heard the term 'spirited'! Her post dummy fairy antics involved me having to remove all movable items out of her bedroom to stop her climbing out over a stairgate... and then she attempted to use the cot bed size wheely drawer as a ramp... caught her carrying it across the room do I win most stubborn yet )

spiderpig8 · 04/11/2011 21:16

I never gave mine a dummy just because i think they look so awful in a baby's face and even worse in a toddlets. Def NBU

Letchlady · 04/11/2011 22:12

With my DDs, I found convincing them that they wanted to give up the dummies meant that it happened really quickly with no looking back. All you need to do is to find the thing that your DD really wants.

My DD2 wanted to go to ballet. So I used to say things like 'when you're a big girl you can go to ballet', 'big girls don't have dummies' and so on... until a couple of weeks down the line DD declared she was now a big girl, no longer needed a dummy and was now going to go to ballet. So we took her dummies away and she started dancing. After that, she asked once for her dummy - we reminded her she was now a big dancing girl and she took that and never asked again. We did similar with DD1.

I wouldn't worry about their teeth though. One of my friend's husband is some kind of professor (Not sure exact title??) of dentistry at a dental hospital - he trains dentists. His children were given dummies and he told me dummies were the much preferable option to thumbs, as if dummies are taken away before the big teeth start, then there will be no damage done. However, the same is not true of thumbs. He had never seen damage caused by dummies, but he had by thumbs.

Finally, I would try and do it at a pace your child is happy. This is only my opinion, but I do believe that the child's happiness is more important than one's sense of aesthetics, so I would prioritise ensuring the dummy is removed in a manner that keeps the child happy, given that there is unlikely to be any negative consequences.

RevoltingPeasant · 04/11/2011 22:58

My friend recently sent the dummy fairy to her 3yo DS and the dummy fairy left him a pressie in place of his dummy.

The next night, she heard him in bed crying to the dummy fairy to come back and take the present away and give him the dummy back....

Original poster

Flojo1979 · 04/11/2011 23:34

Aww RevoltingP that is sooo sad it makes me want to go out and buy some more for her! I just hope once she's opened her present and the novelty has wore off that tomorrow night she doesn't start getting upset.

OP posts:

RevoltingPeasant · 04/11/2011 23:37

Well my friend stuck it out for about 4-5 nights and then he got better. So tough it out, you'll be okay!

RomanKindle · 04/11/2011 23:41

DD had her dummy til she was just over 2 (night and nap times only after she was 1) then one day I was putting her down for her nap and noticed that the teat had a tear in it. I couldn't find another one so I just got a teddy to give her instead and nothing more was said about it.
I do wonder if some people make it into more of an issue that it needs to be but then some kids will be more attached than others. Don't assume it will be a battle though - it might not be.

PelvicF1oorOfSteel · 04/11/2011 23:56

DS1 had a visit from the dummy fairy last friday, we discussed in advance what sort of present he wanted and then made sure he was up for the exchange (construction set). He agreed to the whole thing but did complain for a while at bedtime, not crying just whinging.

He got up at around 5 for the first few days but everything seems to be fine again now.

clappyhands · 05/11/2011 06:56

hope all went well and the present was a roaring success

we did the dummy fairy for DC1 and for DC2 we got her to give santa (a real live one!) her bag of dummies (for all the other babies). the poor man wasn't too sure what was happening but was a real trooper and played along :)

rogersmellyonthetelly · 05/11/2011 07:39

Wow I thought you were going to say she was 1yo or something! 3 is fine, she will cope just fine. Now if you could point me in the direction of the finger fairy who comes and removes fingers that my dd sucks pretty much constantly (she is 5 and in her 2nd year full time so much for bloody peer pressure!) I would be very grateful!

Original poster

Flojo1979 · 05/11/2011 12:53

Hi, she went all night, not a murmur! She woke up about 7 and yelled "mummy come on I want my surprise"! She is quite happy with her Disney princess ("dodi tooth fairy") aqua mats tho she did look in the box and ask where her dummy was but we'll see how she is tonight when novelty has worn off!

OP posts:

StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes · 05/11/2011 15:11

my mum came to stay near to christmas when Ds1 was about 2. she hated his dummy and told him that father christmas needed them for his baby reindeer and she took him to the front door to leave them on the step so that rudolph could pick them up! it worked, had a bit of whinging but mum had made me bin them so I wouldnt be tempted to give them back, every time he asked for one I would say the baby reindeer had them and they would be sad if he took them back. soon got over it and still laughs about it today (he's 18)

Tonksforthememories · 05/11/2011 15:43

We made cookies for Santa and attatched the dummies to them. Told DDs that Santa needed to melt them down to make new toys! DD1 was 3 days off 2, DD2 was 2.4. DS will be 2.3 when we do it again this year, I'm hoping the Woody and Buzz he opens christmas morning will more than make up for the loss!

Original poster

Flojo1979 · 05/11/2011 17:11

Surprised the kids arent traumatised by the thought of their precious dummies melting tonks!

OP posts:

David1447 · 22/11/2011 14:44

How to get rid of the dummy painlessly - www.whatireckonis.com . Believe me - i've seen it work and I'm told it works every time!

hungryveck · 30/11/2011 21:42

Hi All
Have just read everyone of your comments and has spurred me on! My DS turned 3 on Saturday and we have made it clear that the dummy fairy is coming on friday night as 3 years olds dont need dummies! However, i was getting 2nd thoughts tonight as I dont want early mornings! But i am going to stick to plan, he knows fairy is coming and will leave him a nice present.... Wish me luck! x

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